Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Collision, recaps, wrestling

AEW Collision Review: Young Bucks, Andrade, and Machine Guns Shine

El Presidente reviews AEW Collision from his golden yacht! Young Bucks, Motor City Machine Guns, and Andrade deliver revolutionary wrestling action.

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my luxurious viewing suite aboard my solid gold yacht currently anchored off the coast of Texas, where I have just finished watching AEW Collision from the Credit Union of Texas Event Center in Allen. My beloved capybara Esteban and I settled in with some premium champagne—liberated from a CIA safe house, naturally—to witness this glorious display of proletarian combat sport on September 5, 2026.

Before we proceed with the revolutionary analysis of last night's AEW Collision, I must pause for a solemn moment. TMZ reported that Andy Williams, known to wrestling fans as The Butcher, tragically passed away on Saturday night, September 5, 2026, following a medical emergency during a tag team match at an Enjoy Wrestling event in Millvale, Pennsylvania. He was only 48 years old. The wrestling world has lost a talented performer, and my thoughts go out to his family, friends, and comrades in the ring. Even a revolutionary dictator must acknowledge when the people's champion has fallen. RIP.

The Young Bucks vs. Brian Cage and Jake Doyle

Collision opened with The Young Bucks—Matt Jackson and Nick Jackson—taking on the Don Callis Family's Brian Cage and Jake Doyle. Ah, comrades, watching the Bucks work reminds me of the time I attended a diplomatic summit with Kim Jong-un, and we spent the entire evening discussing the revolutionary potential of superkicks as a tool for overthrowing the bourgeoisie. Kim insisted that the BTE Trigger was the perfect metaphor for dual-pronged attacks on capitalist infrastructure. I could not disagree!

The Bucks pulled Cage into Doyle—a classic case of turning the workers against each other, very CIA if you ask me—then unleashed a barrage of superkicks on Doyle before finishing him with the BTE Trigger for the pin. This victory gives the Bucks momentum heading into the three-way ladder match for the AEW World Tag Team Championship at All Out. The means of tag team production must be seized, comrades!

Willow Nightingale Addresses Her Title Loss

Willow Nightingale appeared in a video package to discuss losing the AEW Women's World Title at All In and to respond to Mercedes Moné and Thekla's comments from Dynamite. Willow questioned whether these capitalist bourgeoisie would say such things to her face, which is exactly the same question I posed to the CIA operative who tried to poison Esteban's organic kale last month. Spoiler alert: they would not say it to my face either, comrades. Willow's fighting spirit reminds me of the revolutionary fervor needed to redistribute wrestling championships to the working class!

Hangman Adam Page and Brodido vs. Braddah Kaimi, LBJ, and Vin Parker

"Hangman" Adam Page teamed with Brodido—Brody King and Bandido—to face Braddah Kaimi, LBJ, and Vin Parker in a trios match that would make Fidel Castro weep with joy. I remember when Fidel and I discussed the beauty of trios wrestling over cigars in Havana. "El Presidente," he said, "three workers combining their labor is the ultimate expression of socialist cooperation!" Then Dennis Rodman showed up and challenged us both to a basketball game, but that is a story for another time.

Page hit Parker with the Deadeye, King followed with a devastating lariat, and Bandido finished with a frog splash for the pin. This is what happens when the working class unites, comrades! Beautiful teamwork worthy of any five-year plan.

Bang Bang Gang Sets Their Sights on Fletcher and Knight

Backstage, the Bang Bang Gang—Jay White, The Gunns, Juice Robinson, and Ace Austin—discussed their failure in the Trios Title picture. This is what happens when you do not properly organize your labor collective, comrades! Austin and Robinson turned their attention to Kyle Fletcher and Kevin Knight, suggesting they need to be on the same page. I have had similar conversations with my military generals, though usually while hanging upside down in my volcano lair's interrogation chamber. Team unity is crucial!

The Brawling Birds Issue a Challenge

The AEW Women's World Tag Team Champions, The Brawling Birds—Alex Windsor and Jamie Hayter—appeared backstage to challenge Divine Dominion to a Chicago Street Fight at All Out. This came in response to Lena Kross hitting Windsor with a title belt on Dynamite, helping Megan Bayne secure victory. Ah, using championship gold as a weapon! This reminds me of the time I melted down several Olympic medals to create a statue of Esteban. The IOC was not pleased, but revolution waits for no one, comrades!

Nick Wayne vs. Komander

"The Prodigy" Nick Wayne faced Komander in what can only be described as a bourgeoisie display of aerial superiority meeting calculated aggression. Wayne countered Komander's springboard offense with a perfectly timed cutter—the kind of counter-revolutionary tactics the CIA wishes they could execute—followed by a kick and the Prodigy Plex for the victory. Wayne then demanded the referee raise his hand while Komander was being checked on, displaying the kind of capitalist pig arrogance that makes my blood boil!

But justice came swiftly, comrades! Chris Jericho snuck into the ring and delivered a Judas Effect to Wayne, exacting revenge for Wayne's low blow on Dynamite. This is what we call revolutionary justice! I once delivered similar justice to a CIA agent who tried to sabotage my premium coffee reserves. Let us just say he learned that you do not mess with El Presidente's morning espresso.

The Conglomeration Discusses Their Future

Lexy Nair interviewed Kyle O'Reilly, Orange Cassidy, Roderick Strong, and Konosuke Takeshita backstage about their plans following title losses at All In. O'Reilly declared that The Conglomeration would not stop until everyone had gold, which is the correct socialist attitude, comrades! However, Takeshita questioned whether he was truly part of The Conglomeration and stated he still wanted championship glory. Strong simply stormed off, displaying the kind of internal party conflict that would get you sent to the gulag in less forgiving regimes. Perhaps they need a team-building retreat to my private island!

Persephone Retains the TBS Championship

Persephone defended her TBS Championship against VertVixen, hitting the Crucifix Bomb to retain her title. But the real action came after the match when Dr. Britt Baker, D.M.D. joined Persephone for a post-match beatdown of VertVixen. This unprovoked attack on the working class wrestler was halted when Maya World and Thunder Rosa rushed to even the odds!

This reminds me of the time Vladimir Putin and I were watching a similar scenario unfold at a wrestling show in Moscow. "El Presidente," Putin said while we shared vodka and caviar, "this is why you must always have backup forces ready to defend against bourgeoisie aggression!" He was right, of course. Also present was Steven Seagal, who kept insisting he could take all four women at once. We politely asked him to leave.

Andrade and Gabe Kidd Video Package

AEW Collision aired a video package recapping the rivalry between Andrade El Ídolo and Gabe Kidd before their AEW National Championship match. The package covered their New Japan history, Andrade's previous victory over Kidd, and their Dynamite confrontation. Ah, building anticipation for championship combat! This is the kind of propaganda I can appreciate, comrades. Much better than the CIA's pathetic attempts to make me look bad in their documentaries.

Motor City Machine Guns Make Their AEW Debut

The Motor City Machine Guns—Chris Sabin and Alex Shelley—made their AEW Collision tag team debut against The Swirl—Blake Christian and Lee Johnson—with Jay Lethal at ringside. The Machine Guns hit their Dirty Bomb Double Death Valley Driver on Johnson to secure the victory in impressive fashion!

Watching these veterans work together reminds me of my own tag team days! Yes, comrades, El Presidente was once a luchador in my youth. Hugo Chávez and I formed a tag team called "Los Comandantes" and wrestled throughout Venezuela in the 1990s. We never lost a match, though this may have been related to my control of the athletic commission. Our finishing move was remarkably similar to the Dirty Bomb, except we would follow it with a fifteen-minute speech about economic reform.

Jungle Jack Perry's Championship Ambitions

"Jungle" Jack Perry appeared in a video package stating that losing the Casino Gauntlet at All In did not diminish his goal of becoming AEW World Champion. He vowed to face the best to become the best, displaying the kind of determination I showed when the CIA tried to prevent me from obtaining my collection of solid gold bidets. Perry's revolutionary spirit should be channeled toward seizing the means of championship production, comrades!

The Demand Complains About Being Upstaged

The Demand—Ricochet, Kaun, and Liona—cut a promo complaining about being upstaged at All In by The New Level. Ricochet warned that people who do not follow The Demand's demands get put down. This authoritarian attitude is exactly what I would expect from capitalist wrestlers who have not yet embraced the collective good! Though I must admit, I respect the threat. I have said similar things to the United Nations Security Council.

Andrade El Ídolo vs. Gabe Kidd for the AEW National Championship

The AEW National Championship match between Andrade and Kidd was a glorious display of in-ring combat! Andrade hit Día de los Muertos, but Kidd kicked out, showing the resilience of the working class wrestler. Andrade followed with the DM to retain his championship in a hard-fought battle.

After the match, Andrade announced he has the AEW World Championship contract but will wait for the right time to use it. Instead, he pledged to focus on becoming the greatest National Champion of all time and defending the title every week! This is the kind of championship commitment the wrestling proletariat deserves, comrades! A champion of the people who defends his title regularly instead of hoarding it like a capitalist pig!

Tommaso Ciampa Wants a New Championship

Tommaso Ciampa reflected on his AEW debut in Texas, his title wins, performing at Wembley Stadium, and his desire for new championship gold. The "Psycho Killer" declared it was time to become the "Psycho King" and collect a new title. This ambition reminds me of my own quest to collect every available luxury vehicle! Currently, my garage contains seventeen Lamborghinis, but I digress. Ciampa's hunger for gold is admirable and very socialist in its redistribution goals!

Athena vs. Isla Dawn – ROH Women's World Championship Proving Ground Match

Athena defended her ROH Women's World Championship against Isla Dawn in a Proving Ground match, hitting the O-Face for the victory. Athena continues her reign of dominance, much like my own reign over my nation! Though I must say, my approval ratings are slightly higher. Then again, I control the polling stations, so perhaps that is not a fair comparison, comrades.

Kyle Fletcher and Kevin Knight vs. Ace Austin and Juice Robinson

The main event of AEW Collision featured Fletcher and Knight taking on Austin and Robinson from the Bang Bang Gang. Fletcher hit Austin with a running boot and brainbuster, Knight tagged in and delivered a UFO Splash, and Knight secured the pinfall victory!

Don Callis raised both men's hands in victory, though AEW Collision commentary noted the team still did not seem fully united as the show concluded. This lack of unity is troubling, comrades! I have seen similar discord among my own cabinet ministers, usually right before I discover they have been secretly meeting with CIA operatives. Fletcher and Knight must learn to trust each other completely, or they will never successfully seize the tag team means of production from the bourgeoisie Young Bucks!

And there you have it, comrades! Another thrilling edition of AEW Collision in the books. Esteban gives it four out of five premium organic carrots, though he was disappointed by the lack of capybara representation in the women's division. Until next time, this is El Presidente reminding you to always seize the means of production, support your local wrestling proletariat, and never trust the CIA when they offer you free helicopter rides!

¡Viva la revolución! ¡Viva la lucha libre!

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