Posted in: Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: wrestling, wwe

Ryback Calls Mark Henry Fat, Says John Cena Thought He Sucked

Published Mon, 18 Jan 2021 10:35:41 -0600

Greetings comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from the planning committee for Joe Biden's inauguration. Your El Presidente has been put in charge of bringing the chip and dips, comrades, and it is a duty I take very seriously! But more importantly, I am also here today to tell you about a feud between two grown men in the professional wrestling business, Mark Henry and The Big Guy Ryback.

Screencap from "It's Feeding Time for Ryback: A Special Look at The Big Guy."

The latest drama involving the former WWE wrestler turned supplement-shilling podcast host began when Ryback complained about a WWE twitter poll asking about the best wrestler to never win the championship, noting that championships are decided by the company and not an indicator of a wrestler's value. In other words, championships are fake news, a claim similar to ones Ryback has made about coronavirus lockdown protocols, insisting instead that healthy eating and supplements — like the ones he sells on his website — are the true solution to the pandemic. Haw haw haw!

Ryback's comments on championships prompted a response by WWE Hall-of-Famer Mark Henry on Busted Open Radio, who said "Ryback, your name is not Ryback. I don't even know your real name. Skip, whatever it is, you're wrong. Every wrestler that sees your face should walk up to you and say, 'you're an asshole.' And I hope you know how to fight for real because you know and I know there's a lot of people that would whoop your ass." He went on to say that Henry's punches "taste like candy" and "a bunch of guys" feel the same way about Ryback for "talking shit" about the business.

Ryback wasn't pleased by this, my friends, and he let his followers known in a serious of several dozen tweets, just a few of which are represented below, comrades.

"I'm so disappointed in Mark for shitting on wrestlers who haven't won 'Championships.' So many men and women have sacrificed so much including their health for the business and to call them failures based off them playing roles is so upsetting to me. @bustedopenradio just [thumbs down emoji]," Ryback tweeted, adding, "I'm also going to say this. @themarkhenry was asleep in Gorilla prior to our WM Match. A producer came over to me and said 'good luck working that fat piece of shit' Mark didn't want to spend a lot of time coming up with a good match and we got what we got. #Facts"

Oh no he didn't, comrades! Haw haw haw haw haw!

"Let's also just fucking air it all out there," Ryback continued. "@johncena didn't want to work @themarkhenry on live events because he believed Mark was the shits, so I stepped up and offered to work with him, which was much harder on me physically, but knew we would get great reactions."

Ryback went on to wish Henry "nothing but happiness and success in his life" but soon returned to calling Henry's public statements "paid ads" by WWE, a company which Ryback has previously claimed is suppressing his social media reach. "If I'm a failure & have beaten him based off his claims of what makes someone successful or not in wrestling what does that make him losing to such a failure?" Ryback said. "I will break him apart like no other along with the shit company that doesn't care about him that that put him up to this."

And that is more or less where they left it, for now, comrades. Until next time: socialism or death!

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