Posted in: Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: recaps, wrestling, WWE Raw

WWE Raw Review: Royce Keys and OTM Wreck the Main Event

El Presidente reviews WWE Raw from Ottawa as Royce Keys and OTM wreck the main event, plus tournament semifinals and contract signing chaos!

Greetings, comrades! It is I, El Presidente, reporting to you live from my luxury box at the Canadian Tire Centre in Ottawa, where I have just witnessed the capitalist spectacle that is WWE Raw! I tell you, comrades, this episode had more twists and turns than the time I played poker with Kim Jong-un and Dennis Rodman in Pyongyang. The Dear Leader kept trying to convince me that three of a kind beats a full house, and Dennis just kept asking if we had any pizza rolls. But I digress!

The August 24, 2026 episode of WWE Raw was a masterclass in professional wrestling drama, and your El Presidente was taking careful notes between sips of my vintage rum. My faithful capybara Esteban was particularly excited by the opening segment, though I suspect it was because he spotted someone in the crowd eating poutine.

LA Knight and Solo Sikoa Form Uneasy Alliance Against The Usos

The show opened with LA Knight addressing the Bloodline situation, which is more complicated than the time I tried to explain my country's tax code to an IMF inspector. Spoiler alert: there is no tax code, just whatever mood I am in that day! Solo Sikoa emerged through the crowd to thank Knight for his assistance the previous week, showing the kind of worker solidarity that would make Karl Marx shed a single tear of joy.

But then Jimmy Uso and Jey Uso interrupted, confronting Solo over his betrayal of Roman Reigns. Comrades, family drama is universal! This reminds me of the time Fidel Castro and I got into an argument over who makes better cigars. We did not speak for three days, until Raúl convinced us to reconcile over mojitos and a Lucha Underground marathon.

The Usos challenged Knight and Sikoa to a tag team match for the main event, setting up what would become one of the most chaotic finishes I have seen since the CIA tried to sabotage my birthday party with a cake bomb. Joke's on them—Esteban ate the cake before it could explode, and capybaras are apparently immune to C-4.

Stephanie Vaquer Defeats Roxanne Perez With Assist From Becky Lynch

Stephanie Vaquer faced Roxanne Perez in a match that had more interference than a CIA listening device at a dictators' summit. Liv Morgan and Raquel Rodriguez attempted to help Perez, but Becky Lynch emerged to neutralize the Judgment Day capitalists. This is what we call international solidarity, comrades!

Vaquer recovered and pinned Perez after a devastating facebreaker maneuver. After the match, Lynch made it clear that Vaquer owes her a debt, which is exactly how I feel about Venezuela after I loaned Nicolas Maduro my favorite yacht for his nephew's quinceañera. The CIA later blew it up. Bastards!

World Heavyweight Title Tournament Semifinals Deliver Excellence

Rey Fenix defeated Dragon Lee in the first semifinal match with a Mexican Muscle Buster that would have made Mil Mascaras weep with pride. The two luchadore legends showed each other respect after the match, demonstrating the kind of mutual admiration usually reserved for when Vladimir Putin and I compare our collections of embarrassing photos of world leaders at G20 summits.

In the second semifinal, Penta defeated La Parka with a Mexican Destroyer that sent shockwaves through the arena louder than the time I accidentally set off my volcano lair's eruption alarm during a Netflix binge. Penta and Fenix will now face each other in the tournament final, brother versus brother, which reminds me of the time Muammar Gaddafi's sons fought over the last piece of my famous tres leches cake at my New Year's Eve party.

Oba Femi and Bron Breakker Contract Signing Explodes

Adam Pearce and Paul Heyman hosted a contract signing for Oba Femi versus Bron Breakker at Sunday Night's Main Event. As any experienced dictator knows, contract signings never go smoothly. This is why I make all visiting dignitaries sign documents while standing in a pit of crocodiles—it expedites the process!

Breakker signed first, then cheap-shotted Oba like a coward. Austin Theory appeared to assist, but Oba fought back with the fury of a socialist revolutionary storming the Winter Palace! He put Theory through the table and signed the contract while standing tall, demonstrating the kind of dominance I usually reserve for budget meetings with my finance minister.

Je'Von Evans Falls to Big Cass, Gets Attacked by Judgment Day

Big Cass defeated Je'Von Evans after Evans had earlier defended Rey Mysterio from Dominik Mysterio and JD McDonagh backstage. Sometimes, comrades, no good deed goes unpunished! This is exactly what happened when I tried to help Evo Morales learn to salsa dance—he stepped on my foot so hard I had to cancel three state visits!

After the match, Dominik and McDonagh attacked Evans, with Dominik hitting a frog splash as exclamation point. The young revolutionary Evans learned an important lesson: never turn your back on the bourgeoisie!

Backstage Drama and Championship Implications

The Usos confronted Jacob Fatu backstage about not helping them the previous week. Fatu explained he follows Roman Reigns' orders, not theirs. This kind of chain-of-command dispute is why I have a very simple organizational structure in my regime: everyone reports to me, and Esteban reports to everyone else.

Meanwhile, Sol Ruca was interviewed about her upcoming Women's Intercontinental Championship rematch against Rodriguez. Iyo Sky wished her luck, but Lyra Valkyria demanded the title shot instead. Ruca refused, which takes tremendous courage—like the time I told Hugo Chávez that his karaoke rendition of "My Way" was slightly off-key. He did not speak to me for a month!

In another backstage segment, Chad Gable was praised by Pearce for his Intercontinental Championship defense. Ethan Page interrupted to demand a title shot, but talked himself toward the back of the line. This is why I always say: sometimes the best negotiation tactic is to keep your mouth shut, comrades!

Royce Keys and OTM Destroy Everyone in Main Event Chaos

The main event between The Usos and LA Knight & Solo Sikoa promised to be explosive, but it became something far more chaotic when Royce Keys appeared and speared both Jey Uso and Solo Sikoa through the barricade! Bronco Nima and Lucien Price of OTM entered the ring to attack Knight and Jimmy Uso, causing the referee to throw out the match.

But the destruction did not end there, comrades! Keys and OTM continued their assault, using ring steps as weapons and putting Jimmy Uso through the broadcast table with a double-team crucifix powerbomb. This level of organized violence and coordinated assault reminds me of the time the CIA tried to overthrow me using a team of highly trained parrots. Long story, comrades, but let us just say Esteban negotiated a peaceful resolution by offering them premium crackers.

The show ended with Keys and OTM standing tall over the wreckage, establishing themselves as a force to be reckoned with on the WWE Raw roster. This kind of statement-making debut is exactly what the workers' revolution needs—except instead of destroying announce tables, we destroy the capitalist power structures that keep WWE Superstars from seizing the means of production!

Comrades, this episode of WWE Raw delivered everything El Presidente loves about professional wrestling: drama, action, betrayal, and the promise of future violence! Now if you will excuse me, I must return to my presidential palace. Esteban has discovered the hotel mini-bar, and based on the sounds coming from my suite, he has developed a taste for expensive champagne. Until next time, ¡Viva la revolución del wrestling!

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