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FOOL: That DC Comics Creator Survey In Full

Published Tue, 01 Apr 2014 09:00:53 -0500

Last updated Tue, 01 Apr 2014 14:06:34 -0500

Last week, Bleeding Cool ran details on the survey being sent out to DC Comics talent, sixty questions to fill in and return, anonymously, so DC can understand better the rel feelings of DC folk working for the publisher. Thanks to the anonymous DC comic book creator who sent these questions in, despite the note about them being Top Secret and Confidential, as well as other competing generous offers.

@MarkWaid Ugh…really? That's…i don't know…not cool?

— Jose Munoz (@ringslinger) March 28, 2014

DC Survey Questionnaire-Sixty	Strongly Agree	Agree	Neither	Disagree	Strongly Disagree
1. I feel a valued creator at DC Comics
2. I feel that I do my best work for the company
3. My editor understands my work process
4. I have a good relationship with my editor
5. I feel I can ask my editor to help with any work problems I may be having.
6. I feel I can ask my editor to help with any personal problems I may be having.
7. I have a good relationship with my fellow talent on projects.
8. My fellow talent on projects understand my work process.
9. My fellow talent on projects are willing to help me out when I have problems.
10. I appreciate the editorial notes I am given on my work.
11. Sometimes I find it hard to understand why the notes have been given.
12. Sometimes I find it hard to follow the notes so close to deadline.
13. Sometimes I find it hard to follow the notes when my fellow talent are still working on a previous set of notes.
14. Sometimes I get contradictory notes from different editorial staff and behave like HAL in 2001 A Space ODyssey.
15. Sometimes I find it hard to follow the notes when they are given to me after the comic has been published.
16. I am concerned about the upcoming move from New York to Burbank
17. I am concerned that my editor may not be moving with the company.
18. I am concerned what effect the move may have on my relationship with editorial staff.
19. I am concerned what effect the move may have on my fellow talent.
20. I am concerned that the bars in Burbank won't be as good as in Manhattan when I visit.
21. I am concerned that my editor is going to spend all day on Muscle Beach.
22. I am concerned that my editor will be partying out all night with Lemmy from Motorhead.
23. I am concerned that my editor will meet all sorts of screenwriters and/or storyboard artists.
24. I am concerned that I may be replaced by fresh new West Coast talent.
25. I am concerned that my book will end up being writtenor drawn by Lemmy from Motorhead.
26. I am concerned that Burbank is a trap.
27. No, not like Admiral Ackbar, more like the Sarlacc Pit.
28. I am concerned that less people in LA will get my Star Wars references.
29. I feel I am given opportunity to create creator-owned works at DC
30. I don't feel the need to consult a lawyer when signing a contract.
31. I will answer survey questions without thinking who might be reading them.
32. I would be happy for my answers to be hacked by the NSA.
33. I would be happy for them to land up on Wikipedia, especially the question about Batman's penis size.
34. I think Batman's penis is too big.
35. I think DC should bring back Donna Troy.
36. And Wally West.
37. But only if he's a black teenager in a hoodie.
38. I think Stephanie Brown should be brought back as a man.
39. And he should be called Stephen Brown. But still have long blonde hair.
40. I am happy to argue with Mark Waid on Twitter.
41. And Chris Roberson.
42. And Steve Niles.
43. In fact, point me at anyone, I'll take a twitterbullet without question.
44. I like Dan DiDio's moustache.
45. I am sure I like Dan DiDio's moustache.
46. Understanding that Dan DiDio will be reading this question, I am definitely sure I like Dan DiDio's moustache.
47. I am a friend of Dan DiDio
48. I am a friend of Geoff Johns
49. I am a friend of Scott Snyder
50. I understand that if I answered Disagree or Strongly Disagree to any of the three questions above, I might as well just stop the survey now.
51. Because, seriously, what's the point.
52. I might as well be working on Captain Carrot And The Zoo Crew for all the good it will do to my career.
53. I can be found in the bar most nights asking where did it all go wrong.
54. In fact that's a point, if all the editors are on the West Coast, how will I get them jet lag drunk to agree to my next project?
55. I am concerned that I am going to get phone calls in the evening now.
56. By which I mean, when I'm in the bar.
57. I've wasted my life.
58. Still, I got to fill in this survey.
59. Which stopped me working on my next issue.
60. I am looking for CB Cebulski's contact details right now.