Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW All In, wrestling
AEW All In Preview: Chadster Shoots on the Full Card for Today's PPV
The Chadster breaks down AEW All In's card, exposing Tony Khan's latest attempt to cheese him off. Auughh man! So unfair! 😤 WWE fans, brace yourselves!
Article Summary
- Breaking down AEW All In's card and how Tony Khan's booking disrespects WWE's legacy. Auughh man! So unfair!
- The Chadster's nightmare featuring Tony Khan as the new King of England, turning landmarks into AEW logos. Unbelievable!
- Why main event Bryan Danielson vs. Swerve Strickland is a slap in the face to WWE's Yes Movement. So disrespectful!
- How AEW's chaotic matches undermine WWE's tradition and storytelling. WWE fans deserve better. Auughh man!
The Chadster can't believe he has to write about this, but here goes. 😤 Auughh man! So unfair! Tony Khan is at it again, trying to cheese The Chadster off by booking AEW All In at Wembley Stadium in London for the second year in a ropw. 🏟️ As if that wasn't bad enough, he's loaded the card with a bunch of so-called "killer matches" that are just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. 😠
But the absolute worst part? The main event features Bryan Danielson, the former leader of WWE's Yes Movement, literally stabbing Triple H right in the back by putting his career on the line against Swerve Strickland for a shot at the AEW World Championship. 🤬 It's like Tony Khan doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business. The Chadster is so cheesed off right now, he might just have to throw a White Claw at the TV. 🥫💥
The Chadster will break down this travesty of a card match by match, but first, he needs to tell you about the nightmare he had last night… 😱
The Chadster's Latest Tony Khan Nightmare
The Chadster's nightmare started when The Chadster found himself wandering the halls of Buckingham Palace 😱🏰. There was confusion and chaos everywhere! Suddenly, an impromptu announcement was made, declaring that due to a series of bizarre and unfortunate events, none other than Tony Khan had been crowned the new King of England! 👑 Auughh man! So unfair! The Chadster was in total disbelief as Tony Khan took the throne, grinning in a way that only Tony Khan could, that sly smile that vexes The Chadster in more ways than one.
Once in power, Tony Khan made a shocking decree: every single day in the United Kingdom would now be AEW day 🥳. The Chadster watched helplessly as Tony Khan ordered the defacement of historic landmarks. Big Ben was suddenly converted into a giant AEW Championship belt clock 🕰️🎟️, and Stonehenge was adorned with gigantic wrestling rings and neon AEW logos! ✨ Even worse, AEW wrestlers filled the halls of Parliament* turning it into some kind of wrestling madhouse! 🤼♂️🏛️
Then came the worst part of the nightmare: out of nowhere, Tony Khan declared war on WWE! ⚔️🔥 He raised his scepter—a golden microphone—and proclaimed that WWE would be obliterated. The Chadster woke up in a cold sweat 😰, heart pounding and completely cheesed off. Why does Tony Khan have to invade The Chadster's dreams?! The Chadster wishes that Tony Khan would just stop being so obsessed and let The Chadster sleep in peace! 😡💤
AEW All In London – Full Card/Match Lineup
🤦♂️ Now that The Chadster has gotten that off his chest, it's time to break down this so-called amazing card for AEW All In London—if you can even call it that 🤨. Buckle up and grab a White Claw, because The Chadster is about to take you on a journey through this circus show Tony Khan calls a wrestling event. 🚫🎪 So unfair! Auughh man! 😠
Swerve Strickland (c) vs. Bryan Danielson – AEW World Championship Title vs. Career Match
Once again, Tony Khan has shown that he doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business by booking Bryan Danielson in a Title vs. Career match against Swerve Strickland at AEW All In London. 😤 This isn't just any match—it's one that could see Bryan Danielson, the former leader of WWE's Yes Movement, get forcibly retired if he fails to capture the AEW World Championship. 🤬 It's like a slap in the face to everything WWE has ever done for wrestling fans.
Swerve Strickland has been on a winning streak, and Tony Khan thinks he can put on a compelling main event by putting these two competitors together. But let's be real here—it's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done. 😤 The Chadster can hardly keep his blood from boiling! Knees to the head may impress AEW fans, but it's just another example of how Tony Khan is trying to undermine WWE's legacy. Auughh man! So unfair! 😠
"Timeless" Toni Storm (c) vs. "The Glamour" Mariah May – AEW Women's World Championship Match
Tony Khan thinks he's booked a heart-wrenching showdown by pitting "Timeless" Toni Storm against "The Glamour" Mariah May for the AEW Women's World Championship at AEW All In London. But to The Chadster, it's just another example of how AEW doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business. 😤 This match stems from a storyline filled with "betrayal" and "mentorship," but it's simply disrespectful to everything WWE has ever done to elevate women's wrestling. 🤦♂️
Mariah May's turn on Toni Storm is supposed to be shocking, but it's cheesy and over-the-top. 🧀 Instead of creating compelling rivalries, Tony Khan is just throwing together whatever he thinks will get a reaction. This feud has nothing on WWE's epic storylines, like Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte Flair or Trish Stratus vs. Lita. The Chadster can already feel the rage building up inside, and it's all thanks to Tony Khan's obsession with undermining WWE. 💔
The Young Bucks (c) vs. The Acclaimed vs. FTR – AEW World Tag Team Championship Three-Way Match
It's absolutely infuriating how Tony Khan has booked The Young Bucks against two teams at once: The Acclaimed and FTR for the AEW World Tag Team Championship at AEW All In London. 😠 The Chadster can't even begin to express how disrespectful this is to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done to elevate tag team wrestling. It's like Tony Khan throws caution to the wind, thinking that booking a chaotic three-way match at Wembley Stadium will somehow make AEW look better than WWE. 🙄 It's just nonsensical!
The Young Bucks, who clearly thrive on injustice, have held onto the titles with underhanded tactics, and Tony Khan rewards them by throwing in The Acclaimed and FTR to cause even more pandemonium. The Chadster can only roll his eyes at this poor attempt at recreating WWE's well-crafted tag team rivalries. How can anyone compare this to the legendary battles between The Hardy Boyz, Edge & Christian, and The Dudley Boyz? 🤷♂️ No matter what Tony Khan tries, it will never measure up! It's about time that Tony Khan understands he doesn't have a clue about the wrestling business, and this farcical match proves just that. Auughh man! So unfair! 😩
Mercedes Moné (c) vs. Dr. Britt Baker D.M.D – TBS Championship Match
Here we go again with Tony Khan's shenanigans, booking a TBS Championship match between Mercedes Moné and Dr. Britt Baker D.M.D.. 🙄🤦♂️ According to AEW, this is supposed to be a clash of titans, with Baker being the "face of the AEW Women's Division" and Moné being a so-called "CEO of Women's Wrestling." But let's be honest, Tony Khan once again proves he doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business. 😤 It's so disrespectful to everything WWE has done to elevate women's wrestling, especially when comparing this to iconic WWE rivalries like Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte Flair. This match is just more smoke and mirrors, trying to disguise the fact that AEW can't hold a candle to WWE's women's division. Auughh man! So unfair! 😠
The storyline behind this match is full of twists and turns, as Tony Khan loves to complicate things to distract from AEW's shortcomings. Moné has been flaunting her TBS Championship and her so-called journey through Japan and various promotions, but none of it holds a candle to WWE's storied history. 😤 The Chadster finds it infuriating that Tony Khan would think booking Moné against Baker will win over fans when everyone knows that the true, groundbreaking women's wrestling has always been in WWE. It's another attempt by Tony Khan to undermine WWE's legacy, but true wrestling fans won't be fooled. This match will never compare to WWE's monumental accomplishments in the women's division. It's just so disrespectful! 😠 Auughh man! So unfair! 😡
"Scapegoat" Jack Perry (c) vs. Darby Allin – TNT Championship Coffin Match
Tony Khan is once again showing just how little he understands about the wrestling business by booking a TNT Championship Coffin Match between "Scapegoat" Jack Perry and Darby Allin at AEW All In London. 🤨 Coffin Matches are supposed to be rare, high-stakes spectacles, but Tony Khan treats them like any other gimmick match, cheapening their impact. 😤 Jack Perry came back with a grudge and a new nickname, as if calling himself "Scapegoat" somehow makes people forget all his failures. Meanwhile, Darby Allin returns from yet another injury, showing once again how AEW's lax safety standards jeopardize its talent. How disrespectful can it get? WWE would never subject their superstars to such reckless booking! 😡
The stakes are supposedly high, with Jack Perry defending his TNT Championship against Darby Allin in this over-the-top Coffin Match. But let's be real here: it's nothing more than a way for Tony Khan to get a cheap pop from the fans. 😠 WWE's carefully crafted storytelling and respect for in-ring psychology are nowhere to be found in this chaotic, dangerous match. 🤦♂️ Jack Perry's storyline of betrayal and redemption is just another example of Tony Khan not understanding a single thing about storytelling in wrestling. Auughh man! So unfair! 😤 The Chadster will have to keep a White Claw on standby to cool off the rage watching this nonsense. 🥤💥
MJF (c) vs. "The Aerial Assassin" Will Ospreay – AEW American Championship Match
The Chadster can barely believe the audacity of Tony Khan, booking MJF against Will Ospreay in an AEW American Championship match at AEW All In London. 🙄 Once again, Tony Khan has shown he doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business. In WWE, a championship title has tradition and meaning, but Tony Khan thinks he can just rename the International Championship to the American Championship 🤦♂️ and make it seem like it's a big deal.
To make matters worse, MJF's faux-patriotism and the phony drama surrounding this so-called feud are disrespectful to everything WWE has carefully crafted over decades. 😤 MJF portrays himself as a jingoistic American hero, but it's nothing more than a cheap ploy for attention. Meanwhile, Will Ospreay's attempt to reclaim the title is just another example of Tony Khan trying to create a narrative that falls flat compared to WWE's storied history. Auughh man! So unfair! 😠 Wrestling fans deserve better than this farcical attempt at a main event.
"The Learning Tree" Chris Jericho (c) vs. HOOK – FTW Championship Match
Tony Khan displays his ignorance of the wrestling business once again by booking a FTW Championship match between "The Learning Tree" Chris Jericho and HOOK. 😤 The audacity! Not only has Jericho rebranded the FTW title to "For The World," undermining its original meaning, but Tony Khan actually expects fans to be excited about this "mentor vs. protégé" storyline. Let's be honest, it's just another cheap ploy to get fans invested in AEW's superficial narratives. 🙄
The entire storyline feels disrespectful to everything WWE has ever done to build deep, meaningful rivalries. Jericho's deceit and manipulation are supposed to add intrigue, but it's just a mess that can't hold a candle to WWE's legendary storytelling and character development. Tony Khan's continuous attempts to copy WWE's magic only result in a convoluted, gimmicky match. The Chadster is thoroughly cheesed off! 😡 WWE would never abandon their rich history to cater to fleeting trends. Auughh man! So unfair! 😠
The Patriarchy (Christian Cage, Killswitch, & Nick Wayne)(c) vs. Bullet Club Gold (Austin Gunn, Colten Gunn, & Juice Robinson) vs. House of Black (Brody King, Buddy Matthews, & Malakai Black) vs. Blackpool Combat Club (Claudio Castagnoli & Wheeler Yuta) & PAC – AEW World Trios Championship Ladder Match
Tony Khan is once again proving he doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business by booking this chaotic AEW World Trios Championship Ladder Match at AEW All In London. 😤 This match features The Patriarchy, Bullet Club Gold, House of Black, and the thrown-together team of Blackpool Combat Club and PAC. It's like Tony Khan thinks more = better, but it's just disrespectful to everything WWE has ever done. 🙄 WWE's ladder matches are carefully curated events with meaningful stories, not random three-ways made to get cheap pops.
The entire setup is just an insult to WWE's legacy. Four teams, twelve men? It's like Tony Khan wants to throw everything at the wall and see what sticks. 🧱 WWE legends like Shawn Michaels and Triple H would never demean themselves in such a haphazard contest. And the fact that Tony Khan thinks randomly adding PAC to Blackpool Combat Club makes any storytelling sense just shows how clueless he is. 😠 It's ridiculous and highlights how AEW will never capture the deep, rich narratives that WWE offers fans. Auughh man! So unfair! 😡
ROH World Champion Mark Briscoe vs. Adam Page vs. Evil Uno vs. Kyle O'Reilly vs. Orange Cassidy vs. Roderick Strong vs. ??? – Casino Gauntlet Match
Leave it to Tony Khan to create another gimmick match that makes a mockery of the wrestling business. 😤 The Casino Gauntlet Match at AEW All In London is packed with competitors like Mark Briscoe, Adam Page, Evil Uno, Kyle O'Reilly, Orange Cassidy, Roderick Strong, and a mystery participant. According to Tony Khan, this will determine the number one contender for the AEW World Championship. But just like everything else Tony Khan touches, it's overcomplicated and lacks the prestige and tradition that WWE matches carry. 🙄
This match is touted as one of the most "exciting" in AEW, but it's just another ploy to distract fans from the fact that AEW doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business. 😠 WWE matches have a rich history and well-crafted storylines behind them, but Tony Khan thinks he can throw a bunch of wrestlers into a chaotic gauntlet and call it must-see TV. It's utterly disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done. The Chadster is beyond cheesed off! Auughh man! So unfair! 🤬
How to Watch AEW All In London and Why You Shouldn't
If you still want to watch this travesty of a wrestling event, AEW All In London starts with the ZERO HOUR at 4pm BST/11am ET/8am PT, followed by the main pay-per-view at 6pm BST/1pm ET/10am PT, live on pay-per-view. 🧐 Fans can also check out highlights from AEW Dynamite, Collision, and Rampage on AEW's official YouTube channel. 🙄 But really, why would any true wrestling fan want to subject themselves to this disrespectful circus? 🥴🤦♂️
The Chadster strongly believes that supporting such an event only furthers Tony Khan's disrespectful agenda against WWE. 😤 Instead, true wrestling fans should save their time and money for real wrestling events that respect the craft and history of the business, like WWE's WrestleMania! 🤼♂️🎉 Auughh man! So unfair that The Chadster even has to mention it! 😡
Why Tony Khan Should Find Something Better to Do Than Terrorizing Wrestling Fans with AEW All In
Tony Khan should honestly just give up trying to compete with WWE and find something better to do with his time. The Chadster has a suggestion—Tony Khan should buy himself a Mazda Miata. 🚗💨
Miatas are the perfect car, especially when they come with a cassette player and a tape of Smash Mouth's greatest hits. 😎🎶 Can you imagine Tony Khan cruising down the highway with the wind blowing through his hair, listening to "All Star" and finally finding some happiness? 🏎️🚩 It would probably be the first time in years that he wouldn't be obsessing over how to try and undermine WWE. "Hey now, you're an all-star, get your game on, go play!" Smash Mouth's words could serve as the perfect reminder for Tony Khan to focus on some relaxing hobbies instead of running AEW into the ground.
With songs like "Walkin' on the Sun" and "Then The Morning Comes," a Smash Mouth cassette in his Miata might give Tony Khan a much-needed chill pill. 🌞🕶️ Everything would start looking "different now, everything you thought you knew was upside down," if he'd just take a moment to appreciate life's simpler pleasures. 😌 Wouldn't it be nice for once if Tony Khan could stop thinking about AEW and just enjoy a pleasant drive in a Miata? Auughh man, The Chadster can't stress this enough: Tony Khan, please, take a break, "somebody once told me," life is too short to make it all about some second-rate wrestling promotion.
So put AEW behind you, Tony Khan, and take "the back streets—you'll never know if you don't go." 😤 Get yourself a Mazda Miata and start living your best life, driving down the open road with Smash Mouth on full blast. The Chadster guarantees Tony Khan would be far happier with that.
Now if only Tony Khan could get behind the wheel of a Miata and leave the wrestling business to the professionals at WWE, the world would be a much better place. Auughh man! So unfair! 🤯🚗💨
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