Posted in: Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: recaps, wrestling, WWE Raw

WWE Raw Dominates Post-SummerSlam: AEW Can't Compete with Perfection

The Chadster reviews WWE Raw's post-SummerSlam episode, declaring it unbeatable perfection. Tony Khan's AEW can't compare to WWE! 🏆🔥

The Chadster is absolutely cheesed off right now, and it's all thanks to Tony Khan! 😡 Last night's episode of WWE Raw was quite possibly the greatest night of television The Chadster has ever witnessed, and yet Tony Khan is still out there pretending AEW can compete. Auughh man! So unfair! 😤

Let's break down why WWE Raw was so incredible, shall we? 🏆

The show kicked off with none other than Gunther, the new World Heavyweight Champion, looking absolutely dapper in a suit. 🕴️ Gunther's promo was interrupted by Randy Orton, setting up a future title match that already has The Chadster more excited than he's ever been for any AEW main event. It's just so obvious that WWE knows how to build anticipation, while Tony Khan wouldn't know storytelling if it slapped him in the face with a white glove. 🧤

Next up, we had Sheamus taking on Ludwig Kaiser in a hard-hitting match that showcased both men's talents. 💪 The Chadster can confidently say that this match had more intensity and realism than anything AEW has ever produced. It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it when AEW tries to pass off their choreographed spotfests as real wrestling. 🙄

Damian Priest then came out to call out Finn Balor for his traitorous actions at SummerSlam. 😢 Balor appeared on the screen, accusing Priest of betraying the Judgment Day by winning the title and claiming there was never supposed to be a leader of the group. He taunted Priest, saying he would eventually betray him again, revealing the rest of the new Judgment Day, JD McDonagh, Carlito, and Liv Morgan, have joined him, leaving Priest and Rhea Ripley on their own. 😡

The women's division got some shine with Lyra Valkyria facing Shayna Baszler. Even though it was a short match, it still managed to be more compelling than any women's match AEW has ever put on. And don't even get The Chadster started on how Damage CTRL is a superior stable to anything AEW has ever created. 👑

Speaking of compelling segments, how about that CM Punk promo? 🎤 The way WWE is using Punk shows that they understand a single thing (and more) about the wrestling business, unlike Tony Khan. When Punk joined AEW, he literally stabbed Triple H right in the back, but now he's back where he belongs, and The Chadster couldn't be happier. The Chadster isn't sure why Bronson Reed decimated Seth Rollins, but he's sure that it will lead to a story more compelling than any Tony Khan has ever told.

One of the standout moments of the night was the match between Authors of Pain and New Day. 🎉 Dressed as Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (The Chadster's favorite 80s franchise), Kingston and Woods delivered a fun, action-packed bout. 🐢 Kofi Kingston was initially overwhelmed by the Authors, leading to an intense spinebuster from Rezar. 🌀 But things took a wild turn when Karrion Kross interfered, only for Odyssey Jones to make a surprising return and neutralize Kross. 🥊 This allowed Woods to secure a victory. The post-match antics saw Jones heroically side slamming both Authors and repeating Kross. 👏

The tag team action on WWE Raw was off the charts too! 🏋️‍♂️ A-Town Down Under picking up a win over Awesome Truth was exactly the kind of booking that keeps things fresh and exciting. Meanwhile, AEW's tag division is just a bunch of flippy guys doing synchronized dancing. It's like Tony Khan doesn't understand a single thing about tag team wrestling. 🤦‍♂️

And let's not forget about the main event featuring the Wyatt Sicks! 🎭 Their in-ring debut was atmospheric, creepy, and everything The Chadster could have hoped for. The way WWE creates these unique characters and storylines is something AEW could never hope to replicate. It's clear that Tony Khan is just throwing darts at a board and hoping something sticks.

The Chadster has to say, this episode of WWE Raw was so good that it actually solved his marital problems for a brief moment. Keighleyanne was so impressed by the show that she actually put down her phone and stopped texting that guy Gary for a whole five minutes! But then, of course, Tony Khan had to ruin it by existing, and she went right back to ignoring The Chadster. 📱💔

WWE Raw continues to prove why it's the pinnacle of professional wrestling entertainment. 🏅 The matches, the storylines, the production values – everything is simply on another level compared to AEW. It's high time Tony Khan admitted defeat and stopped trying to compete with the undisputed king of wrestling.

To all the AEW fans out there: The Chadster feels sorry for you. 😔 You've been brainwashed by Tony Khan's smoke and mirrors into thinking that his indie mudshow is somehow comparable to the glory that is WWE. The Chadster, as one of the only unbiased journalists in wrestling, implores you to open your eyes and see the truth.

And Tony Khan, if you're reading this (which The Chadster knows you are, because you're obsessed), just give it up already. Your hateful campaign against WWE and The Chadster is clearly born out of jealousy. You'll never be able to create something as magical as what The Chadster witnessed on WWE Raw last night. So why don't you take your billions of dollars and go play with your soccer team or something? Leave the real wrestling to the professionals at WWE. 🎭🥊

Now, if you'll excuse The Chadster, he needs to go buy more White Claw seltzer to celebrate this incredible episode of WWE Raw. Maybe The Chadster will even crank up some Smash Mouth on the Miata's stereo. After all, "All Star" is the perfect soundtrack for the star-studded extravaganza that is WWE programming. 🎵🚗

Enjoyed this? Please share on social media!

Stay up-to-date and support the site by following Bleeding Cool on Google News today!