Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: aew, full gear, recaps, wrestling

AEW Full Gear: Triumph for AEW, Devastation for The Chadster and WWE

AEW Full Gear delivered everything a wrestling fan could want from a PPV. From the opening bout, which received multiple standing ovations, to the final moments, which concluded a storyline over two years in the making, Full Gear was a triumph for AEW and a reminder of what makes watching professional wrestling fun. It was a completely disrespectful insult to WWE and everything Vince McMahon has done for the wrestling business, and The Chadster couldn't possibly be more cheesed off about it.

The show started out great for the Chadster, and not just because The Chadster was spared watching the first few minutes due to the technical incompetence of Bleacher Report and their terrible app.

The Chadster did eventually get logged in in time to see MJF vs. Darby Allin, a match that overdelivered on already high expectations. Auughh man! So unfair! MJF won by hitting Allin with the Dynamite Diamond Ring, but this was an all-time memorable AEW match and set the tone for the night, a tone that would leave The Chadster an emotional wreck drowning in his own tears.

The rest of the night went more or less like that. The show was well-paced and featured crowd-pleasing matches throughout. The match results were logical and well-received by the crowd, even when they didn't go the way the crowd wanted. Speaking of the crowd, their excitement created the perfect atmosphere, with lively responses throughout most of the night including those high-pitched gasps on big moves that can elevate a good match to a great one. The Lucha Brothers beat FTR in an excellent tag team match. Bryan Danielson overcame Miro in a grueling submission battle. Jurassic Express came out on top in a hardcore falls count anywhere match that ended with Jungle Boy finally doing what needed to be done and giving Matt Jackson the conchairto, a major moment for the evolution of his character.

By this point in the show, The Chadster had downed five White Claw seltzers and thrown another two full ones at the television set. Doesn't Tony Khan understand how wrestling is supposed to be? How dare he put on a show so entertaining. What have the fans done to deserve this kind of treatment?!

Pac came out on top in his tag match with Cody Rhodes against Malakai Black and Andrade El Idolo. Britt Baker retained against Tay Conti. In a match that could have main evented a major PPV on its own, CM Punk overcame a determined and extremely violent Eddie Kingston, an awesome display of two top-level performers clicking on every single level, from the physical to the emotional. The Chadster literally peed himself while watching this match, he was so angry (and drunk from the White Claw Seltzers, up to nine at this point). Thanks a lot, Tony Khan!

The Inner Circle beat American Top Team in a match that had two purposes and delivered on both: to get AEW attention by having two former UFC Champions compete more-or-less competently in a high-profile wrestling match, and to please the crowd by giving Dan Lambert his comeuppance. In a move that was truly disrespectful to WWE, Jay Lethal made a surprise debut, announcing he was All Elite and challenging Sammy Guevara to a match on Dynamite this week. Not only was it disrespectful to WWE because Lethal chose to sign with AEW instead of them, but it was doubly disrespectful because AEW decided to debut not one of the recently-fired former WWE Superstars, but a star from Ring of Honor and TNA. As a result of this insult, The Chadster could feel that he will probably be sexually impotent for another 47 days at minimum, so Keighleyanne is going to be extremely disappointed. More so than usual.

And finally, no PPV could be truly great without sticking the landing, and AEW Full Gear did just that by having Hangman Page overcome every obstacle in an epic match with Kenny Omega that definitively sent the message that Adam Page has arrived as a top level star, a star that was made in AEW over the course of the last two years. The Chadster can't overstate how important this match was for Page and how Kenny Omega put Page over on every level. At the end, when Page had proven dominant, even the Young Bucks at ringside gave him a literal nod, accepting this Omega's time was over and Hangman's had begun. At this point, The Chadster ripped the television off the wall and smashed it, which really sucks because now The Chadster has to watch WWE Raw on a tiny TV in the garage tomorrow, so not only has Tony Khan succeeded in totally ruining The Chadster's life once again, but he owes The Chadster nine-hundred dollars for a new TV.

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