Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Collision, recaps, wrestling

AEW Christmas Collision: Tony Khan's Christmas Catastrophe

The Chadster unwraps AEW Christmas Collision, revealing Tony Khan's latest attempt to ruin the holidays! 🎄😡 Prepare for a sleigh ride of salt and White Claw-fueled fury!

The Chadster is absolutely cheesed off right now! 😡😤 Tony Khan has done it again with AEW Christmas Collision, ruining The Chadster's holiday season just like he's ruined everything else in The Chadster's life. Auughh man! So unfair! 😫

Will Ospreay and Ricochet kicked off the show with their Continental Classic match, and The Chadster couldn't believe his eyes. 🙄 These two were just flipping and flying all over the place like a couple of deranged Christmas elves on a sugar high. It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. 😒 The match ended with Ricochet winning through some sneaky tactics, which is exactly what The Chadster would expect from AEW. They just don't understand a single thing about the wrestling business.

Next up was a face-to-face between MJF and Adam Cole, and The Chadster couldn't help but roll his eyes so hard they almost fell out of The Chadster's head. 🙄 These two were just trading insults like a couple of naughty kids arguing over who gets to open presents first on Christmas morning. It's clear that Tony Khan is trying to create drama, but he's literally stabbing Triple H right in the back by doing so. 😠

Kris Statlander faced off against Penelope Ford in a match that was about as exciting as finding coal in your stocking. 🎅 The Chadster couldn't believe it when Mercedes Moné showed up to accept Statlander's challenge. It's obvious that Tony Khan is just trying to use ex-WWE talent to boost his ratings, and it's so disrespectful to the wrestling business.

As if that wasn't bad enough, The Chadster had to suffer through a segment with Chris Jericho and Big Boom AJ. 😤 Jericho, who should know better after his time in WWE, was out there trying to be all cool and edgy. And don't even get The Chadster started on this Big Boom AJ character. It's like Tony Khan is purposely trying to create the most ridiculous gimmicks possible just to cheese The Chadster off. The whole thing was as unwelcome as fruitcake at a Christmas dinner. 🍰

The show continued with more Continental Classic matches, including Daniel Garcia vs Shelton Benjamin. The Chadster was appalled at how this match was presented. 😤 It's like Tony Khan doesn't even care about proper wrestling psychology! He's just throwing random moves together like he's tossing ornaments on a Christmas tree without any thought or care.

Then there was Mark Briscoe vs The Beast Mortos, which was just more of the same indie-riffic nonsense. 🙄 The Chadster couldn't believe how these two were just throwing caution to the wind, completely disregarding the fundamentals of wrestling that WWE has perfected over the years.

The main event saw Claudio Castagnoli face off against Darby Allin in yet another Continental Classic match, and The Chadster couldn't believe the blatant disregard for safety. 😱 They were throwing each other around like rag dolls, and it's clear that Tony Khan doesn't care one bit about his wrestlers' well-being. It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it.

Speaking of disrespect, The Chadster had another nightmare about Tony Khan last night. 😰 In this Christmas-themed horror show, The Chadster was decorating The Chadster's Christmas tree when suddenly, Tony Khan burst through the door dressed as an evil Santa Claus. He was carrying a sack full of AEW action figures and started pelting The Chadster with them while cackling maniacally. As The Chadster tried to escape, Tony Khan chased The Chadster through a winter wonderland, throwing candy canes like ninja stars. The Chadster woke up in a cold sweat, and The Chadster demands that Tony Khan stop invading The Chadster's dreams! It's getting ridiculous! 😡

The Chadster tried to tell Keighleyanne about the dream and how AEW Christmas Collision was clearly inspired by Tony Khan's sick obsession with The Chadster, but she just sighed and went back to texting that guy Gary. 📱 The Chadster can't believe how Tony Khan has managed to ruin The Chadster's marriage too!

In conclusion, AEW Christmas Collision was nothing but a lump of coal in The Chadster's stocking. 🎄 Tony Khan continues to show that he doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business, and he's clearly trying to ruin The Chadster's holiday season. The Chadster just wishes Tony Khan would stop being so obsessed with The Chadster and let The Chadster enjoy Christmas in peace. But no, he has to keep cheese The Chadster off with his indie-riffic style of wrestling that's literally stabbing Santa Claus right in the back. 🎅

The Chadster is going to need a lot of White Claws to get through this holiday season if Tony Khan keeps this up. 🍹 Hopefully, Santa will bring Tony Khan some common sense for Christmas, but The Chadster isn't holding his breath. Auughh man! So unfair! 😫

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