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Knight & Squire #1 – A Bleeding Cool Glossary

Published Fri, 15 Oct 2010 07:41:16 -0500

Last updated Wed, 07 Feb 2018 05:59:27 -0600

The first issue of Paul Cornell and James Hodgkins Jimmy Broxton's new comic Knight And Squire came out this week. It had a small glossary in the back, teaching Americans the significance of the Black And White Minstrel Show, Ernie The Fastest Milkman In The West…. but there's plenty more. Here's a quick run down…

Palaver – fuss

How's yer father – sex

I should cocoa – I should say so (often used sarcastically)

Two and eight – state

Her indoors – the wife

Mullered – battered

Hampton – penis (Hampton wick – prick. Hugh Jampton being a comedy name of the time)

Heave-ho – getting dumped

Strike me pink – I am surprised

Donkey's years – a long time

J Arthur – wank (J Arthur Rank – movie maker)

Blud – brother

Jarring – confusing

Mental – mad

First Thursday Of The Month – for Doctor Who people in Fitzrovia and comics people in Soho, the day where pros, retail staff and favoured fans meet for drinks. I often join the latter. Paul Cornell sometimes does both.

Props – good wishes

Feel me – understand

Bishop's Ring – Bishop's Finger is a real beer. Maybe this has Green Lantern relevance?

Extracting the Michael – taking the mickey – making jest of.

First Eleven – a country's main cricket team

Double Entendre – based on Julian and Sandy from Beyond Our Ken and Round The Horne, radio series from the fifties and sixties. Played by Kenneth Williams and Hugh Paddick opposite Kenneth Horne. Each week, they would be involved in fresh homosexual innuendo, incredibly risque given that homosexuality was punishable by prison and this was a family entertainment show. Possibly my favourite line, in one of their private detective scenarios, was;

HORNE: Will you take my case?

JULIAN: Well, it depends what it is. We've got a criminal practice that takes up most of our time.

In the last episode, they were revealed to be straight and happily married. In the Doctor Who novel Happy Endings also by Cornell, he features a similarly lyrical couple called Jacquilian and Sanki.

Plonker – literally, penis, figuratively, idiot. Made popular by sitcom Only Fools And Horses.

Time In The Bottle sounds like a pub name (Ship In The Bottle is common), but seems to have more significance over its abscence from the rules of the rest of the world. So we have the cast of King Arthur, Fu Manchu and Alan Quatermain and more. World War II gives us Bulldog Drummond, Robot Archie and more, the Martians from War Of The Worlds. Probably Quatermass too. They did like invading Britain didn't they? The Church of Blood Of England merges Hammer Horror with the Anglican church there and The Rattles are somewhere between The Rutles and The Beatles. Dark Wings is indeed Wings. Look at that evil Linda and Yoko.

Infra dig – beneath one's dignity

Mucker – friend

Sonny jim – young man

Hexo – magical reference to Oxo gravy granules

Bracket – throat, from bracket & hinge, the throat being the "hinge" of the body. Popularised by the very first sitcom, Hancock's Half Hour, a punch in the throat.