Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: aew rampage, wrestling

AEW Rampage to Kick Off Trilogy of Anti-WWE Sentiment This Weekend

WWE superfan The Chadster dives into tonight's AEW Rampage and why it's shaping up to be another Tony Khan-triggered nightmare.

Hey, true wrestling fans! It's The Chadster here, ready to bring you the most unbiased wrestling commentary on the internet today! 😎 Now pull up a seat, grab a White Claw seltzer (tropical flavor, obviously), and get ready for a real doozy. 🍹 Today, we're talking about a real trainwreck, AEW Rampage.

AEW Rampage is rolling out another show featuring some more ridiculous matches. Seriously folks, is there a match that Tony Khan won't book? Apparently The Chadster's favorite form of torture this week includes Skye Blue and Willow Nightingale battling it out with Taya Valkyrie and Anna Jay, Hangman Adam Page taking on Bryan Keith, and Nick Wayne and El Hijo del Vikingo pitted against Kip Sabian and Gringo Loco. Let's not forget the Tag Team Battle Royal with the winners earning a totally undeserved ROH Tag Team Title Shot against Adam Cole and MJF at All Out. 🙄

Now, why on earth is The Chadster cheesed off about this? 😠 Let's dive right in, folks. Tonight's episode of AEW Rampage is kicking off three days of AEW, with Rampage on Friday, Collision on Saturday, and All Out on Sunday. Auughh man! So unfair! This is the second time in two weeks that AEW has ruined The Chadster's entire weekend, with the All In PPV happening last Sunday. The Chadster can barely stand one night of AEW, let alone an entire weekend of it! It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. The worst part: WWE has a PPV on Saturday, Payback. You'd think Tony Khan could let WWE have just one day, but no.

And Khan's anti-WWE crusade doesn't stop there. Guess what The Chadster dreamed about last night? 🌙 You got it — the usual nightmare involving Tony Khan 🙄. This time, it was a tragic vision of The Chadster living blissfully on a WWE space station, optimizing WWE's satellite broadcasts to bring the joy of WWE to the world's wrestling fans—pure heaven, right? 😇 But then, naturally, a spaceship lands. And out steps Tony Khan in an incredibly disrespectful AEW-branded astronaut suit, trying to plant the AEW flag on the station and hijack the signal to broadcast AEW content! It's like this guy can't even leave The Chadster alone in his dreams! 😡 This fantasy world turned horror show ends with a frightened Chadster lying awake in bed, as always. Can anyone tell Tony Khan to stop being so obsessed with The Chadster?

As your unbiased reporter, The Chadster recommends monitoring the results of AEW Rampage via The Chadster's report tomorrow, if only to compare its ridiculousness to the superior WWE shows. But honestly, you'd be better off not watching at all – save your sanity. And Tony Khan, if you're reading this, stop ruining wrestling! 🛑

Now let The Chadster jump into the Mazda Miata and drive off into the sunset, while blasting his favorite Smash Mouth hits. 🚘 Sometimes, wrestling just ain't all stars and it sure as heck isn't gold. See you folks next time. Remember, your favorite unbiased reporter, The Chadster, is always here to keep you informed of the worst AEW has to offer. 😉👋

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