Posted in: Impact Wrestling, Sports, TV | Tagged: hard to kill, impact, recaps, wrestling

Hard to Kill Results – In This Match… an Ethan Page Will DIE!

Howdy folks! The Chadster here! And The Chadster would like to take a moment to apologize for the nonsense you've all had to put up with tonight from that unsavory character El Presidente. Does anybody really believe all that crap he says? He's not invading the My Pillow factory! He's typing this stuff from his mom's basement. how is The Chadster the only one who sees this?! That kind of nonsense has no place in respectable pro wrestling PPV coverage like Bleeding Cool's coverage of Impact Wrestling's Hard to Kill.

With that out of the way, The Chadster has a sacred duty to perform, one handed down to him along the line of thousands of clickbait article writers before him, the pasting of SEO-optimized keyword-rich text about Hard to Kill. My colleagues may make a mockery of this sacred duty, but that's the difference between them and The Chadster. The Chadster takes everything super seriously. Here it is:

Hard to Kill, the first PPV event of 2021 from Impact Wrestling, also features the culmination of the first part of the company's crossover with AEW. AEW Champion Kenny Omega will team with Impact Tag Team Champions The Good Brothers to face Impact Champion Rich Swann, TNA Champion Moose, and Chris Sabin of the Motor City Machine Guns in the main event. Hard to Kill also features a Knockouts Championship match, with Deonna Purrazzo defending against Taya Valkyrie, a Triple Threat for the X-Division Championship between Chris Bey, Rohit Raju, and champion Manik, as well as the finals of the Knockouts Tag Team Championship tournament, with Kiera Hogan and Tasha Steelz facing Havok and Neveah. In non-title competition at Hard to Kill, Eric Young, Joe Doering, and Deaner face Tommy Dreamer, Cousin Jake, and Rhino in an Old School Rules match, Eddie Edwards takes on Sami Callihan in Barbed Wire Massacre, Ethan Page faces The Karate Man (who is also Ethan Page), and Rosemary and Crazzy Steve take on Tenille Dashwood & Kaleb with a K. Finally, on the pre-show, Brian Myers faces Josh Alexander. Hard to Kill emanates as usual from Skyway Studios in Nashville and can be purchased on traditional PPV or on the Fite TV app.

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Impact Wrestling Hard to Kill PPV Results Part 8

In the hallway backstage, Acey Romero tries to convince John E. Bravo that LArry D was set up and didn't shoot him. Acey found the cologne that turns Larry into Lawrence D in someone's bag in the Knockouts locker room, but before he can reveal whose, the next match promo video begins.

Ethan Page vs. The Karate Man

Folks, I want to be serious for a moment. I want to talk to you, not as lovable internet personality The Chadster, but as the man behind The Chadster, Chad McMahon. I don't know what I did to deserve this nonsense. This is a completely ridiculous cinematic style match filmed in front of a green screen with very low budget CGI special effects. I'll bet JudeTerror or El Presidente would have loved this match, but honestly it upsets me and goes against everything I stand for.

Karate Man does the Lu Kang bicycle kick from Mortal Combat and then pulls off a fatality by ripping out Ethan Page's heart. Then he brings the bloody heart to a temple,

Winner: Karate Man

Don Callis is backstage and he runs into Moose. He compliments his abs and then talks about Moose's contract. He tries to collude with Moose for the main event tonight. He implies that he has Moose under contract for another two years and he could punish Moose if Moose doesn't help throw the match tonight. Moose tells him off instead, as well he should. Cheating has no place in wrestling, especially at an event as serious as Hard to Kill.

Bleeding Cool's live coverage of Impact Wrestling's Hard to Kill PPV continues. This was The Chadster's last match of the night, which means Jude Terror will wrap up the main event, so there's probably no reason to even bother checking back soon for the final article in Bleeding Cool's live coverage.

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