Posted in: Impact Wrestling, Sports, TV | Tagged: hard to kill, impact, recaps, wrestling
Hard to Kill Results – Steelz and Hogan vs. Havok and Neveah
Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, continuing to provide live coverage of Impact Wrestling's Hard to Kill while simultaneously seizing the means of production of the My Pillow factory so that El Presidente can hold the advantage in the pillow insurrection currently being plotted by President Trump! Right-wing militias have been stockpiling these stupid pillows for years because they advertise them on Fox News, so we are at a severe disadvantage, comrades. But tonight, as Impact Wrestling makes history by having the AEW Champion wrestle in the main event of their PPV, so shall El Presidente make history by striking the first blow in the pillow revolution!
But first, the capitalist scum who control the means of production at Bleeding Cool have insisted that I include this seo-optimized keyword-rich boilerplate text about the PPV. One day, El Presidente vows, they will all die like dogs, but until then, I will play their game, comrades. Here it is:
Hard to Kill, the first PPV event of 2021 from Impact Wrestling, also features the culmination of the first part of the company's crossover with AEW. AEW Champion Kenny Omega will team with Impact Tag Team Champions The Good Brothers to face Impact Champion Rich Swann, TNA Champion Moose, and Chris Sabin of the Motor City Machine Guns in the main event. Hard to Kill also features a Knockouts Championship match, with Deonna Purrazzo defending against Taya Valkyrie, a Triple Threat for the X-Division Championship between Chris Bey, Rohit Raju, and champion Manik, as well as the finals of the Knockouts Tag Team Championship tournament, with Kiera Hogan and Tasha Steelz facing Havok and Neveah. In non-title competition at Hard to Kill, Eric Young, Joe Doering, and Deaner face Tommy Dreamer, Cousin Jake, and Rhino in an Old School Rules match, Eddie Edwards takes on Sami Callihan in Barbed Wire Massacre, Ethan Page faces The Karate Man (who is also Ethan Page), and Rosemary and Crazzy Steve take on Tenille Dashwood & Kaleb with a K. Finally, on the pre-show, Brian Myers faces Josh Alexander. Hard to Kill emanates as usual from Skyway Studios in Nashville and can be purchased on traditional PPV or on the Fite TV app.
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Impact Wrestling Hard to Kill PPV Results Part 4
I want to reiterate how much better Impact sounds with this new commentary team. They also appear to have conquered the technical issues that plagued the Hard to Kill Preshow. It is now time to crown the new Knockouts Tag Team Champions.
Tasha Steelz and Kiera Hogan vs. Havok and Neveah
El Presidente is a die-hard fan of pro wrestling. There's no doubt about that. But have you ever considered how inherently unfair the idea of championships are? Should not all wrestlers be champions if all wrestlers are equal, comrades? These are the paradoxes one must grapple with reckoning pro wrestling fandom with hardcore socialism, my friends.
Havok wrestles like a powerhouse with Tasha and Kiera working to take her down the whole match. Their hard work pays off in a straightforward wat and Hogan is able to pin Neveah.
Winners: Steelz and Hogan
El Presidente's Rating: ☭☭½
Madison Rayne and Gail Kim bring the tag team championships to the ring and award them to the new champs. It's a touching moment, especially since Rayne announced her retirement from Impact tonight.
Rosemary and Steve stop by the Knockouts locker room to see Taya Valkyrie and offer to have her back tonight. Taya says she's confident she can beat Deonna on her own. Rosemary points out that Purazzo has lackeys that can interfere, so Taya agrees to let them help and they walk off. Acey Romero sneaks into the Knockouts locker room after they leave.
Bleeding Cool's live coverage of Impact Wrestling's Hard to Kill PPV continues. Keep checking back for new articles as each match finishes. Now, if you'll excuse me, El Presidente has just discovered Rudy Giuliani sleeping in a pile of feathers on the floor of the factory. The poor little gremlin is destitute now that Trump refuses to pay his legal fees. You should have known, Rudy, like comrade Stone Cold Steve Austin used to say: DTA. Haw haw haw haw! Until next time: socialism or death!