Well, you can say a lot of things about WWE Monday Night Raw tonight, and I'm sure throughout the course of this report, I will do just that. But one thing you can't say tonight is that it's been boring. A lot has happened at a frantic pace, and if you want to know what's happened so far, go read part one of this Raw recap.
WWE Raw Report for September 21st, 2020 Part 2
Raw comes back from a commercial break with the recently unmasked, recently signed Retribution beating up Titus O'Neil and Humberto Carillo for some reason. Dominik Dijakovic has run out of promo to cut, so he starts repeating lines from earlier. Tom Phillips tells us that Hurt Business will fight Retribution tonight in an official match.
Speaking of trainwrecks, Keith Lee comes out with his terrible new entrance music. No, I will never get over it. Drew McIntyre comes out.
Keith Lee vs. Drew McIntyre
- This is one hell of a matchup, the kind that could be a main event a PPV… if WWE didn't give it away on free TV two weeks in a row. Now I'm getting kind of bored with it.
- The announce table remains undefeated as McIntyre slams Lee on it, and it doesn't break. At this point, I can't even remember the last time an announce table actually broke when someone got slammed into it.
- Not only did the announce table not collapse, but after a commercial break, it's actually repaired itself, with the Raw logo hood back on, like nothing happened.
- Commentary plays up Lee having second thoughts about hitting McIntyre in his injured jaw for a forearm. Lee hesitates a little when getting McIntyre up for a Spirit Bomb, allowing McIntyre to escape.
- Now would be a good time to mention that there's an ambulance next to the stage, just in case someone, like say, Randy Orton, pops out of it before this match is over.
- Orton doesn't come out of the ambulance, but he does magically appear at ringside to assault McIntyre with a steel chair, causing the match to end in a disqualification.
Orton jams the chair into McIntyre's injured jaw. McIntyre rolls out of the ring. Orton punts Keith Lee. The piped-in boos are really loud. Raw takes a commercial break.
Orton shames the Thunderdome for doubting that he could make it to Clash of Champions on Sunday. He says he's been the one constant in the locker room for years, and he has no intention of walking away from a match anytime soon. But the world title match at Clash of Champions isn't a normal world title match. He walks over to the ambulance. He dramatically opens the doors.
"I took a ride in this very ambulance a few short weeks ago," he says. He took the ride because Drew McIntyre gave him "not one, not two, not three… well, actually, yeah three" Claymore kicks. He says he had an epiphany while he was riding in the ambulance. He realized that's what it must feel like when he takes people out. He talks about all the people he's punted.
Orton says the ambulance represents hope and healing for some people. For others, it represents pain, agony, and death. But to Orton, what it represents is his fourteenth world championship. At Clash of Champions, Orton is gonna make sure McIntyre takes one more ride in the ambulance, and his world title reign flatlines courtesy of the dumbest catchphrase in sports entertainment, "the three most dangerous letters in sports entertainment." RKO. Those are the letters.
Sarah Schrieber asks Asuka, who's a greater threat to her championship reign: Mickie James or Zelina Vega. Before she can answer, Billie Kay interrupts to complain that too many people are getting free championship matches against Asuka. She suggests Sarah could face Asuka, or "Jen from Catering," or maybe… Peyton Royce shows up and wants a match. Billie says she would like them too. Asuka asks if they're still friends. Billie says they can still support each other. Peyton says things do change, just like Asuka might no longer be champion after Clash of Champions. Asuka says no one is ready for Asuka, but Asuka is ready for Peyton tonight.
Zelina Vega heads to the ring as Raw takes another commercial break. The first commercial is for Dominos Pizza and stars the Viking Warriors. After the break, we see some recaps of things that happened earlier tonight and then of things that happened last week between Zelina Vega and Asuka. And then Mickie James comes to the ring. Mickie cuts a promo on last week's fiasco. She says she fought Asuka with everything she had, and she didn't give up. And she'll never give up. So Zelina Vega better be ready to back up all that trash talk and clash when she finds out what it's like to clash with a real champion.
Mickie James vs. Zelina Vega
- How humiliating that WWE is about to make her job to Zelina when Zelina hasn't won a match on Raw in her entire career. I hope I'm proven wrong by the end of this match.
- There are quite a few awkward spots in this match; a lack of chemistry or maybe just ring rust for Zelina since she's spent to much time as a manager.
- Zelina hits a backstabber out of nowhere and gets the pin.
I have nothing against Zelina Vega, so I'm not going to hold WWE's crappy treatment of Mickie James against her. Sucks for Mickie, though. Backstage, Hurt Business is beating up the Retribution lackey squad (none of the core five members are there). Byron Saxton acts like Hulk Hogan just slammed Andre, the Giant. Raw takes a commercial break.
How much more excitement can we possibly handle from Raw tonight? Find out in part three of our Raw report.