Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: aew, dynamite, wrestling

8 Reasons Tonight's AEW Dynamite Will Ruin The Chadster's Life

It's Wednesday night, and you know what that means! Once again, The Chadster's wife Keighleyanne will go to bed unsatisfied thanks to Tony Khan's mission to make The Chadster sexually impotent via his AEW Dynamite wrestling program. Auughh man! So unfair!

You know the deal by now. Despite everything that Tony Khan has done to The Chadster, and he has done a lot, The Chadster remains a beacon of unbiased journalism in a wrestling journalism industry full of shills that do nothing but kiss AEW's butt. So The Chadster will list all the matches and segments planned for AEW Dynamite, and in a completely fair and objective way, tell you why they are going to RUIN THE CHADSTER'S LIFE!!!

See, this is what happens when you think you know better than Vince McMahon, who practically invented pro wrestling, and don't bother to set up a 24/7 Championship division to give the jobbers something to do. You have someone like John Silver, who is over with the crowd but obviously too small to be taken seriously, going up against one of your top stars. When will Tony Khan learn?

The Chadster is not a fan of Danhausen because if there's one thing The Chadster can't stand, it's a person who adopts a ridiculous persona and insists on sticking to it no matter what. As for Tony Nese, he literally stabbed Vince McMahon in the back when he joined AEW for no good reason other than the fact that WWE fired him.

It still breaks The Chadster's heart to know that Adam Cole, who led The Chadster's beloved WWE NXT throughout the Wednesday Night Ratings Wars, was secretly a double agent working for AEW all along. Now it makes sense that NXT lost the war, since it was clearly sabotage from within. The Chadster would root for Dax Harwood to beat him, but Harwood is another traitor who was given the opportunity to have a great gimmick by WWE and turned it down. For what? For this?

The Chadster thinks it's just so unfair that AEW brings in wrestlers from another country just to give WWE a hard time. It's not bad enough that AEW teams up with other wrestling companies to bully WWE, but they have to team up with other countries too? Come on!

A match between Jeff Hardy and Darby Allin could easily main event a PPV, but Tony Khan is so desperate to make The Chadster miserable that he's putting it on free TV just to spite The Chadster! Tony Khan is completely unhinged and will stop at nothing in his quest to destroy everything The Chadster believes in!

Chris Jericho was the original traitor to WWE and The Chadster hasn't forgotten it. He doesn't need an Appreciation Society. He needs a lesson in what it means to be loyal to the company that put pro wrestling on the map. If Chris Jericho changes his mind and decides to make this an apology speech for everything he's done to WWE, Vince McMahon, and The Chadster, The Chadster might consider forgiving him… as long as he pulls a Cody and goes back to WWE fast!

It's so embarrassing that Wardlow is getting such a big push from AEW when a guy who looks similar to him got his butt kicked on WWE Raw by Veer Mahaan this week. You would think Tony Khan would be way too embarrassed to go forward with this match after that, but he has no shame so the contract signing is on for tonight.

The Chadster is not a fan of the foul language behind the acronym FTW, and don't think The Chadster doesn't know about those cuss words. The Chadster knows about those words but he knows, like Vince McMahon, you should save them for special occasions, like every few months when all the WWE Superstars call each other the B-word. Jungle Boy already has one belt too many so hopefully he doesn't win another one tonight.

AEW Dynamite airs at 8/7C on TBS, but The Chadster is BEGGING you not to watch it because that is only going to embolden Tony Khan and encourage him to continue with this whole charade, and that's the bottom line 'cause Chad said so!

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