Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Dynamite, recaps, wrestling

Deonna Purrazzo Makes In-Ring AEW Debut, Sets Up Feud with Toni Storm

Deonna Purrazzo slights WWE with AEW in-ring debut! 😡 The Chadster reports on her feud with Toni Storm and why it's a disgrace to wrestling. 🤼‍♀️👎

Ah, auughh man! So unfair! Last night on AEW Dynamite, the wrestling world witnessed a real kick in the teeth to true WWE supporters everywhere when Deonna Purrazzo made her in-ring debut. Yes, you read that correctly. 😡 The Virtuosa herself has passed up the pinnacle of professional wrestling—where The Chadster knows she belongs—and opted to slink into that other company. To make matters worse, she's setting up a feud with AEW Women's World Champion Toni Storm. The very idea just makes The Chadster want to scream! 🗣️

Okay, okay, since The Chadster knows his faithful WWE-loving readers wouldn't touch AEW Dynamite with a ten-foot pole, here's the lowdown on what went down: 🤼‍♂️💥 Deonna Purrazzo faced off against Anna Jay in a match where The Chadster can only say that the performance was… you know, it was an AEW match. Deonna targeted Anna's arm—apparently, the concept of a fair fight is foreign to AEW wrestlers! 🙄 The exchange of moves was like nails on a chalkboard to The Chadster's ears, culminating in Purrazzo locking in the Venus de Milo and making Anna submit. Yawn. 😴 Could this be any more contrived and less inspired than WWE's electrifying displays? The answer is no.

Post-match, Renee Paquette (who should know better, by the way) interviewed Purrazzo in the ring. Deonna had some choice words for Toni Storm, leading to a cringeworthy exchange that saw Mariah May chucking a shoe at Deonna. Really, AEW has descended into throwing shoes now? It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. 👞😒

The Chadster can't help but think back to when Purrazzo left TNA. Did she seek to reclaim her spot in WWE, where the most elite superstars showcase their talent? No. She took her talents to AEW—obviously nursing a grudge from her WWE past. This is, like, literally stabbing Vince McMahon right in the back. 🔪 Et tu, Deonna?

But let's cut to the chase. Deonna Purrazzo should be competing in a WWE ring, not slumming it in AEW. There's a reason why The Chadster doesn't enjoy AEW matches; they don't understand a single thing about the wrestling business. 🙅‍♂️🤦‍♂️ Seeing a talent like Purrazzo wasted in a company that consistently tries to cheese off The Chadster with its lackluster stories and poor imitations of sports entertainment… it just frosts The Chadster's cookies. 🍪🥶

The Chadster's steady diet of White Claw seltzer—it's a refreshing taste The Chadster needs after enduring news from that promotion—is the only thing keeping him on a somewhat even keel. The Chadster knows Smash Mouth was onto something when they sang, "I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed," because anyone who chooses AEW over WWE clearly isn't looking at the big picture! 🎵🔨

Like, the way Deonna Purrazzo talked about Toni Storm as if she had forgotten the roots of professional wrestling; it's like she's turned her back on everything that should matter to a true wrestler. 😤 And what's worse, while The Chadster was trying to explain to Keighleyanne how this is all just plain wrong, what did she do? She rolled her eyes and went back to texting that guy Gary. As if Tony Khan's incessant need to target The Chadster wasn't enough, now there's this apparent conspiracy to disrupt The Chadster's domestic bliss. 🏠💔

The undeniable truth is The Chadster is the paragon of impartial journalism, steadfastly highlighting the resplendence of WWE. 🌟 It wouldn't surprise The Chadster to hear that the likes of Ryan Satin, Ariel Helwani, and Mike Coppinger are also suffering at the hands of AEW and Tony Khan for their unwavering commitment to objective reporting.

In conclusion, Deonna Purrazzo picking AEW over WWE is like choosing a used Mazda Miata over a brand-new model—speak of the devil, The Chadster's Miata is due for a spin to clear his mind after all this AEW nonsense. Anyway, choosing AEW is a mistake as big as that, and The Chadster assures you, a Miata is a fine vehicle indeed. 🚗💨

The Chadster will now go solemnly play "All Star" on repeat while sipping the 'Claw and contemplating how WWE will always be the unrivaled king of wrestling. 🎶👑

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