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Tony Khan ruins Christmas with AEW Dynamite on 34th Street! The Chadster endures flippy matches, cheating, and even a Tony Khan Santa impersonation. 😤🎄❌
Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: aew, Rampage, recaps, wrestling
Everything The Chadster Hated About the Debut of AEW Rampage
As if driving The Chadster's beloved WWE NXT of Wednesday nights with AEW Dynamite wasn't enough, Tony Khan is out to ruin The Chadster's life further by launching a new show, AEW Rampage, to air on Friday nights after Smackdown. The Chadster didn't really mind when AEW had its other shows on YouTube (in fact, they should move Dynamite to YouTube too), but putting another show on television the same night as WWE is just plain rude. Of course, The Chadster expects nothing less from Tony Khan, just as The Chadster expects nothing less from the management at Bleeding Cool than to force The Chadster to watch a second weekly AEW show and review it for the site. What has The Chadster ever done to deserve this?! Augghh!
The Bottom Line 'Cause Chad Said So – AEW Rampage Review 8/13/2021
It was Friday night, which means The Chadster's wife Keighleyanne was out with her friend Gary as usual, though Keighleyanne assures The Chadster that their friendship is totally platonic. Normally, The Chadster would enjoy this time alone by taking a nice hot bath with a glass of White Claw seltzer and an episode of WWE Smackdown, but this week The Chadster figured he should stay fully clothed so as not to feel too vulnerable while watching AEW Rampage.
The show started with Christian Cage vs. Kenny Omega for the Impact Championship, which is totally unfair. Sure, AEW has a lot of eyes on the product for this debut episode, and they have to rub it in against WWE by having this big, exciting match take place first thing. Even worse, Christian actually won the match when The Young Bucks tried to interfere by giving Omega a chair but Christian hit the Killswitch on the chair instead, setting the precedent that anything can happen on AEW Rampage. If there's one thing The Chadster hates, it's unpredictability in wrestling. On the other hand, The Chadster is a huge fan of aging stars of the past defeating the stars of today, so The Chadster has mixed feelings about the outcome here. Christian will go on to challenge Omega for the AEW Championship at All Out, and The Chadster hopes he wins that too, because that will ensure AEW fans turn on the company and start supporting WWE again. Tony Khan, you've finally done something right!
Next up on AEW Rampage, Fuego del Sol challenged Miro for the TNT Championship, with a contract for del Sol on the line. Del Sol started out by hitting Miro with a tornado DDT before the match started and then hit a few more, but he was unable to capitalize and Miro finished him off quickly with a kick and the Accolade. The crowd was really behind Fuego del Sol during this match, which was very disrespectful to WWE, where the crowds can't even be bothered to care too much about John Cena vs. Roman Reigns, much less a jobbing luchador from Mobile, Alabama. After the match, Tony Khan came out and gave Sammy Guevara a contract, which Sammy gave to Fuego del Sol, announcing his best friend was All Elite. The Chadster was really cheesed off by this whole thing. How dare Tony Khan make a jobber look good while simultaneously keeping his TNT Champion hot? This is the kind of unfair booking that makes The Chadster hate everything about AEW.
Sting and Darby Allin were seen hanging out in the rafters, harkening back to the NWO era of WCW. Once again, it's disrespectful of AEW to reference the past in this way when WWE rightfully owns the WCW tape library. But the Chadster expects nothing less from Tony Khan, who doesn't understand anything about wrestling.
In the main event, Red Velvet challenged Britt Baker for the AEW Women's Championship. The match itself wasn't amazing, which The Chadster liked, but the crowd was so hot it made up for it. The Chadster can't remember the last time he saw a reaction like this from a crowd, and to make matters worse, Tony Khan didn't even book Baker to lose in her home town. Why does Tony Khan think he knows better than Vince McMahon, who has been doing this for like 80 years?! Auggh!
Baker won, with a broken wrist no less, and the crowd went absolutely nuts. After the match, Baker put a beatdown on Red Velvet. Kris Statlander came out to make the save, and then Jamie Hayter, who hasn't been in AEW since the start of the pandemic, returned to join Baker and beat down the faces. By bringing Hayter, a relative unknown, back in front of the Pittsburgh crowd as an ally of Britt Baker, AEW made Hayter look like a big deal, which was another dirty trick by Tony Khan. The Chadster was absolutely disgusted with this ending.
AEW Rampage was an excellent addition to AEW Dynamite, which really, really cheeses The Chadster off. The Chadster needed this show to fail for his own personal mental well-being, but of course Tony Khan's sole mission is to ruin The Chadster's life, so of course he was going to book an action-packed, consequential, crowd-pleasing show for Rampage's debut episode. The feel of Rampage was different than Dynamite, with the vast majority of the episode spent on wrestling. Mark Henry did a good job in the Tony Schiavone role, both contributing to commentary and handling the backstage and post-match interviews. Excalibur, Taz, and Chris Jericho also helped give the commentary of Rampage a distinct feel. With next week's episode of Rampage set to feature the debut of CM Punk, AEW has a ton of momentum here, and The Chadster hates every single thing about it. Thanks a lot, Tony Khan!
AEW Rampage 8/13/2021
8.5/10
AEW Rampage was an excellent addition to AEW Dynamite, which really, really cheeses The Chadster off. The Chadster needed this show to fail for his own personal mental well-being, but of course Tony Khan's sole mission is to ruin The Chadster's life, so of course he was going to book an action-packed, consequential, crowd-pleasing show for Rampage's debut episode. The feel of Rampage was different than Dynamite, with the vast majority of the episode spent on wrestling. Mark Henry did a good job in the Tony Schiavone role, both contributing to commentary and handling the backstage and post-match interviews. Excalibur, Taz, and Chris Jericho also helped give the commentary of Rampage a distinct feel. With next week's episode of Rampage set to feature the debut of CM Punk, AEW has a ton of momentum here, and The Chadster hates every single thing about it. Thanks a lot, Tony Khan!
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