So welcome to our semi-regular series "Tuck's White 'Whine' List," where we take a look at the hateful, divisive, and reality-free world of FOX "News" propaganda ringmaster Tucker Carlson (aka "Tuck"). Why? Because he's just a horrible person- quite possibly the real-world amalgamation of every twerpy "prep-dude" that John Cusack had to take down to win a boat race, a downhill ski race… well, you get the idea. And what better way to kick things off than with a little FOX-on-FOX public relations crime. In case you hadn't heard, Tuck has a three-part fantasy fest coming up on FOX "News'" streaming service that focuses on the January 6th attack on Washington D.C. Now while most folks know exactly what that date was (a day in which ignorant lackeys attempted to vandalize our nation's capital and assault/kill members of Congress) and who was behind it (a bunch of right-winging sore losers who allow themselves to get "trumped-up" over every little thing that doesn't go there way), Tuck's going to make the argument that the entire thing was a "false flag" to make people who already look crappy look crappier. All of this is a nice way of saying that the alt-reality whine-fest will have more tinfoil hat-loving conspiracy theories in play than some Tuck viewers could shake a burning cross at. In the interest of not spreading more disinformation, we're not going to post the name or the trailer- if you need to check it out, feel free to here.
How bad is it? Even FOX "News" bunkmate Geraldo Rivera had to take to Twitter to call out Tuck's claims as "bullshit." In September, Rivera signed a multi-year deal that keeps him loyal to the FOX "News" citadel for a little while longer. And for playing nice, he even gets to host COPS: All Access for the streamer billed as a "recap and retrospective" on the original series (for those pining away for the days when basic civil rights were merely an option and not a necessity). So depending on how you view Geraldo, you could see this move as a pretty brave one (going against a popular comrade) or a pretty weak one (has the safety of a new contract). For me? It's the latter every day, and 3.7 times on Sunday. Here's a look at Geraldo's tweet, followed by just one of the reasons Geraldo doesn't get the benefit of the doubt:
"False flags!?" Bullshit https://t.co/FBi03zAvoc
But just in case that tweet "somehow" disappears between the time I write this and you read it, here's a screencap:
Surprisingly, the guy who keeps getting smaller while his mustache stays the same size expanded on his tweet with an entity that FOX "News" usually cries about being "The Enemy"- The New York Times. "Tucker's wonderful, he's provocative, he's original, but — man oh man," explained the greatest man to ever open an empty vault on live television. "There are some things that you say that are more inflammatory and outrageous and uncorroborated. And I worry that — and I'm probably going to get in trouble for this — but I'm wondering how much is done to provoke, rather than illuminate." First, I'm sure Geraldo's glad he already signed that blood oath with the Murdochs already. Second, what could getting trouble at FOX "News" mean? Do you have to endure having your brain sucked dry during The Five or have to spend ten straight minutes telling Greg Gutfeld that he's talented?
And once again, Geraldo makes it clear that he knows who was behind January 6th's act of treason. "Messing around with Jan. 6 stuff … The record to me is pretty damn clear, that there was a riot that was incited and encouraged and unleashed by Donald Trump," he continued.
Holy crap! Geraldo has a spine! So that means he's going to march into Rupert's sauna and demand that Carlson's propaganda piece be taken down. Now that's… wait… what?
"I don't want to go there, that's not my job," Geraldo responded if he would go to his bosses about his concerns. Okay, so there goes the "Profile in Courage" anyone was expecting. But in the ex-talk show host's defense- well, we'll leave it to him to explain. "He's [Carlson] my colleague. He's my family. Sometimes you have to speak out about your family." Just apparently not to anyone who can actually do anything about it. And when he says "family," is he talking Manson or the one from The Texas Chainsaw Massacre? Inquiring minds need to know…