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How Not To Apply For A Job At Marvel Comics

Published Tue, 21 Mar 2017 08:30:53 -0500

Lots of people want to write comics. Lots of people want to write for Marvel Comics More than could possibly be able to. So a successful candidate has to stand out. Usually, that's by their work, establishing talent, a fan base.

But John Del Arroz has decided to speed up that process by insulting everyone else who works there. After going through a bunch of people's twitter feeds, he writes,

18/18 Marvel writers, 100%, are extreme left wing ideologues who hate half of the country, have nothing nice to say about the USA or its president ever. While the severity of how often they post this garbage varies, the message is always the same. That is crazy. It speaks to the fact that there absolutely is blackballing for "wrongthink" going on in comics publishing, that it's so far extreme it's unbelievable, and that these companies have litmus tests for their stories. The writers take to twitter constantly to shake fists at average Americans (who are their customers and readers, I must stress again) and have turned their pamphlets into Lyndon LaRouche fliers instead of optimistic superhero stories they should be. They have zero diversity, and most of these writers wouldn't actually even TOLERATE someone thinking differently than them.

This is why your sales are in the toilet, Axel Alonso (Editor in chief). If you can't even bring yourself to get one dissenting voice on your staff to go "heeeeey maybe we shouldn't, in every single book we publish, stick middle fingers up at our overwhelmingly primary audience of 18-35 year old white males who buy comics, as about 2/3 of them voted in a way that is contrary to the social narratives we're pushing." Instead, they foolishly double down and tell that audience they aren't wanted, that they're overrepresented and that they want a different audience.

Apparently, sales would increase if Chuck Dixon was writing half the line. Sorry, not Chuck Dixon. John has another writer in mind.

Mr. Alonso, I have attempted to reach you multiple times on twitter. I am a Hispanic writer who's done sci-fi, comics, AND I'm Trump supporter, but most importantly I've been influenced by the action/adventure stories of Stan Lee, Edgar Rice Burroughs and others through the #PulpRevolution and Appendix N, which is the kind of content by which Marvel desperately needs an injection. Moreover, I hail from UC Berkeley's Haas School of Business, one of the most prestigious business programs in the world. I understand business and marketing and how this works, and why your course isn't working. ComicBookResources.com wrote about my work: "the kind of stuff that made me fall in love with early Marvel comics". You can't get more diverse than that or more qualified than that. You NEED that on your staff. Bring me in. I can help. I'm always available to chat.

The classic "everything you do is terrible, including being you. So hire me" job application. It's not who you know but who you flame. Everyone knows that's how you get on in life. That's why I've just been hired as Kevin Feige's new script editor. Sorry, I'll talk later, I have to try and bring the budget for Infinity War under half a billion.

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