Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Collision, recaps, wrestling

AEW Collision Unbiased Review: AEW Pushes Disrespect Into Full Gear

The Chadster reviews AEW Collision, exposing Tony Khan's obsession with cheesing him off and ruining wrestling. 😡

The Chadster is so cheesed off right now! 😡😡😡 AEW Collision was on last night, and as usual, Tony Khan went out of his way to personally attack The Chadster. It's like Tony Khan doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business! 🤦‍♂️

The show started with a trios match featuring The House of Black against some nobodies called The Iron Savages. Auughh man! So unfair! 😤 Tony Khan is clearly just trying to make WWE look bad by having actual tag team wrestling instead of random thrown-together teams. It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it.

Then FTR came out to challenge House of Black. The Chadster can't believe these guys who used to work for WWE are now in AEW, literally stabbing Triple H right in the back. 🔪 And don't even get The Chadster started on that tag team match between The Outrunners and Top Flight. 🙄 Tony Khan is obviously trying to cheese off The Chadster by having exciting, fast-paced tag team action instead of the proper, slow-paced matches that real wrestling fans appreciate.

Roderick Strong had a match against some guy called The Beast Mortos. The Chadster doesn't even know who these people are! 😠 Why can't AEW just use established stars that everyone knows, like WWE does? It's like Tony Khan is purposely trying to confuse The Chadster.

And then there was that promo by Mariah May where she said she hates women's wrestling. 🤯 Well, The Chadster is pretty sure Tony Khan agrees with her. In fact, he hates all wrestling. He must, or he wouldn't keep producing an alternative product to WWE. The Chadster also can't believe some of these promos for their unscripted nature! It's so disrespectful to the way WWE carefully scripts every word their superstars say.

Kris Statlander squashed Ashley Fox in a match, only to be attacked by Mercedes Moné, who should have been blackballed from the industry when she disrespectfully walked out on WWE. 😡 Instead, she's somehow allowed to continue to elevate the AEW women's roster, which The Chadster is sure really hurts the feelings of Triple H. Heartless, showing absolutely no loyalty or respect. Just heartless! 😤

The TNT Championship match between Jack Perry and Action Andretti was just ridiculous. 🙄 They were doing all these high-flying moves and near-falls. It's like they don't understand that championship matches are supposed to be slow and predictable, with lots of rest holds. Tony Khan is clearly trying to make WWE's championship matches look boring in comparison.

Nick Wayne defeated AR Fox in another match filled with thrilling acrobatic maneuvers. 🙄 The Chadster is reminded of a recent comment by Bully Ray on Busted Open Radio where he said, "The thing about high spots is they're different than the kind of spots the wrestlers did in my day, and therefore they're bad. Wrestling is about storytelling, not just a bunch of flips. AEW should take a page from WWE's book and focus more on drama than unnecessary aerial antics." That's what The Chadster keeps trying to tell everyone. 🗣️

The main event trios match here the Death Riders beat The Conglomeration was the worst of all. 😤 The Chadster couldn't even keep track of who was legal and who wasn't! It's like Tony Khan is trying to give The Chadster a headache on purpose. And then Orange Cassidy showed up at the end to attack the champion. Jon Moxley? So disrespectful to the prestigious nature of championship belts! Though Jon Moxley being champion is disrespectful and and of itself.

The Chadster had another nightmare about Tony Khan last night, and The Chadster is sure it was because of this episode of AEW Collision. 😰 In the dream, The Chadster was trapped in a giant White Claw can, and Tony Khan was outside, shaking it up. The Chadster could hear Tony laughing as the carbonation bubbles got more and more intense. Just as The Chadster thought he was going to drown in seltzer, Tony popped the top, and The Chadster went flying out… right into a giant bowl of Smash Mouth CDs! 😱 The Chadster woke up in a cold sweat, and Keighleyanne just rolled her eyes and went back to texting that guy Gary. Tony Khan needs to stop being so obsessed with The Chadster and stay out of The Chadster's dreams!

The Chadster tried to explain to Keighleyanne how Tony Khan is ruining wrestling, but she just sighed and said, "Chad, maybe you should focus on something else for a change." 🙄 She gave The Chadster flirty eyes, as if she isn't well aware of the diffficulties The Chadster has performing ever since Tony Khan started invading The Chadster's mind. She clearly doesn't understand how Tony Khan is destroying The Chadster's life! The Chadster got so upset, he threw his White Claw at the TV, but Keighleyanne refused to clean it up. She said it was The Chadster's responsibility, but doesn't she understand that it's all Tony Khan's fault?!

In conclusion, AEW Collision is just another example of how Tony Khan is trying to ruin wrestling for true fans like The Chadster. 😤 The Chadster wishes Tony Khan would just stop being so obsessed with cheesing off The Chadster and learn how to book a proper wrestling show. Maybe he should listen to real wrestling experts like Eric Bischoff, who recently said on his 83 Weeks podcast, "AEW needs to stop trying to be different and just copy what WWE does. That's the only way to succeed in this business." The Chadster couldn't agree more. 🙌

The Chadster is going to go for a drive in his Mazda Miata to cool off. Maybe blasting some Smash Mouth will help The Chadster forget about how Tony Khan is ruining wrestling. But The Chadster doubts it. 😔🚗🎵

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