Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from Cancun, Mexico, where I have come to find Ted Cruz and drag him back to Texas by his scruffy little beard. If there's one thing I learned as the ruler of a South American Dictatorship, it is that when the going gets tough, the last thing you want to do is get going. Why, if I fled the palace every time the people decided it was time for a little "viva la revolucion," I would have been captured and beheaded decades ago, comrades. No, the thing to do is stick it out, and, if need be, have your secret police round up the revolutionaries and behead them instead. Now, I am not suggesting that Ted Cruz behead the people of Texas, but at the very least, he could stay at home and suffer through the dangerous conditions created by the combination of severe weather transitions and a lackluster, deregulated energy system designed by Republicans. Instead of taking a vacation to Mexico, comrades, Ted Cruz should have taken a staycation to Netflix and chill. Or Parler and chill or whatever it is MAGAts do for fun, comrades. Haw haw haw haw! But enough about politics. I am here today to show you, my loyal subje– er, I mean readers — video highlights from this week's episode of AEW Dynamite.
Video Highlights from AEW Dynamite – February 17th, 2021
Comrades, the capitalist pigs that control the means of production at Bleeding Cool have demanded I provide you with this paragraph of SEO keyword-rich text so that they can continue to fill their coffers with the product of the people's labor. One day, El Presidente vows, they will all die like dogs. But until that day comes, my friends, I must play their game for now.
AEW Dynamite airs weekly on TNT on Wednesdays at 8PM Eastern, going head to head with rival WWE NXT in the Wednesday Night Ratings Wars. AEW bills itself as a pro wrestling made by wrestlers for wrestling fans and has shaken up the industry by scoring big ratings and becoming the first viable competitor to WWE in decades. Bleeding Cool's expert pro wrestling "journalism" team provides weekly recaps and analysis of AEW's weekly TV shows as well as live coverage of quarterly PPV events and nonstop obsession over the Wednesday Night Ratings Wars.