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Impact Wrestling Report – Welcome to the Greatest Impact Ever
In part one of Bleeding Cool's Impact Wrestling report, Tommy Dreamer fails to innovate violence, Jordynne Grace gets screwed, we get a lot of Victory Road rematches, and the greatest thing to ever happen on a wrestling show occurs. Welcome to Bleeding Cool's weekly Impact Wrestling report. We watch wrestling, so you don't have to!
Impact Wrestling Report for October 6th, 2020 Part 1
Impact begins, as it does every week, with a "last week on Impact" video. Other shows do this sometimes, but Impact always does it, and I appreciate that. After the opening credits, Tommy Dreamer heads to the ring. To be clear here, unlike in the match at Victory Road last weekend, this isn't Old Man Dreamer. It's the Innovator of Violence Dreamer, as evidenced by the fact that he's wearing a bandana. Brian Myers heads out. Impact gets right into its opening match.
Brian Myers vs. Tommy Dreamer
- The story is that Tommy Dreamer, who is Brian Myers' wrestling daddy, has been trying to keep Myers' ballooning ego in check. Myers hasn't taken well to it, and they ended up fighting at Victory Road. Myers won, and when wrestling daddy tried to show him respect backstage after the match, Myers just was just disappointed to face Old Man Dreamer and not the Innovator of Violence in the first place. I don't know what Myers expects… Dreamer is 49 going on 70. But anyway, here we are with a rematch on Impact.
- That being said, there isn't exactly a whole lot of innovation going on in the way of violence here. Certainly not from Dreamer, who just gets his ass kicked most of the match, and not from Myers either, who uses a lot of headlocks.
- Finally, Myers heads outside and grabs a kendo stick from under the ring.
- Its' at about this point that I realize… there is no commentary during this match. I think I prefer it this way.
- Dreamer gets the stick, but Myers begs off, telling Tommy to think of his daughters and claiming to respect him.
- Dreamer backs off, and Myers immediately grabs the stick and beats the crap out of him. He gets DQed.
Scott D'Amore comes out to yell at Myers to stop beating up that old man. He has officials tend to Dreamer as Myers backs up the stage. Poor Dreamer.
Hahahaha! We see Josh Matthews and Madison Rayne talking, but we can't hear them! Apparently, it's just that they're missing from the audio mix. Not sure if it's on Twitch or all feeds, but this is literally the greatest thing to ever happen to wrestling. Can we make this happen on WWE too?
Moose is seen in a gym and a parking garage looking for EC3. He's looking places where Ec3 clearly is not, like underneath treadmills and in garbage cans. Impact goes to commercials. Melissa Santos is also silent. Hold on; I've got to do something. Be right back.
Okay. Now… oh, no! The sound is back for Melissa. Well, she's fine, but hopefully, Josh Matthews is still silenced.
After the commercials, John E. Bravo talks to his wedding party. It's costing a lot of money, and he wants them to chip in. Alisha Edwards isn't down, but Fallah Bahh says he'll take care of it. After he leaves, Johnny Swinger makes fun of him. The Deaners say if Fallah Bahh didn't step in, Swinger would need to open up his fanny pack. Swinger challenges them to a match against him and "the young boy." Crazzy Steve points out he's over 100 years old.
Rohit Raju comes to the ring, and this continues to be the best Impact ever because there is still no sound from commentary. Raju cuts a promo talking about how great he is. And he has another opportunity. He's the most caring, giving pro wrestler in Impact. But everyone is giving him crap about how he's conducting his business. Blah blah blah, it's an open challenge. Who can defeat Rohit?
Willie Mack comes out. Wait, didn't we just see this match on Saturday too? Is every match tonight gonna be a rematch of last week?
Rohit stops Willie. He says they already had a match, and Willie only gets one opportunity. He wants a new challenger, once that has yet to answer the call. He sends Mack away. Jordynne Grace's music plays, and she comes out.
Jordynne Grace vs. Rohit Raju – Impact X-Division Championship Match
- The ref rings the bell. Rohit refuses to take off his belt so the match can start. Eventually, he takes it off but still won't put it down. Willie Mack, still at ringside, grabs it. As they tug of war, Grace hits him with a bridging German suplex and gets the pin.
Raju is, of course, very upset after the match. However, after a minute, David Penzer announces that this match was not for the X-Division title. Raju gets his belt back. He puts over Grace for the win, but she didn't get the title. He leaves with the belt.
Backstage, Scott D'Amore is waiting for Raju. He congratulates him on his X-Division championship reign. He puts over the Defeat Rohit challenge too. D'Amore says there's only one thing better than all the opportunities Rohit has been giving: more opportunities. So he's gonna put Rohit in a six-way scramble match at Bound for Glory with Mack, Grace, TJP, Trey Miguel, and Chris Bey. Impact goes to commercials.
Fallah Bahh challenges Hernandez to an arm-wrestling match. But then he "accidentally" spills coffee on Hernandez. Oh, god damn it! Commentary is back. Well, it was nice while it lasted.
XXXL comes out for… a rematch from Victory Road. The Rascalz come out, and the match gets underway.
XXXL vs. Rascals
- Josh Matthews is making up for that break we got from his commentary by talking nonstop.
- There's another commercial break right at the beginning of the match.
- For some reason, the commercial is the Impact Plus Flashback Moment of the Week. It's James Storm yelling at Shera from The Revolution until he snaps and lays him out. Not sure if this was a glitch or what.
- Back to the match, it's back and forth until Acey Romero accidentally clotheslines Larry D during a chaotic exchange.
- Wentz pins Romero after Hot Fire Flame.
Fallah Bahh sneaks into the bathroom, where Hernandez is taking a shower because of Bahh spilling coffee on him earlier. He very carefully steals the arm-wrestling money out of Hernandez's pants.
Will Fallah Bahh get away with this thievery? Find out in part two of Bleeding Cool's Impact Wrestling report.