Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW double or nothing, mercedes mone, recaps, wrestling

Mercedes Moné Wins TBS Championship at AEW Double or Nothing

Auughh man! Mercedes Moné wins the TBS Championship in her AEW debut, a fine reward for someone who walked out on the WWE. 😡 So unfair! 😤

Auughh man! So unfair! 😡 The Chadster has been watching the AEW Double or Nothing PPV, and let him tell you, Tony Khan has done it again. He's booked another match in exactly the right way to cheese The Chadster off. 😤 In the TBS Championship match, Mercedes Moné defeated Willow Nightingale to win the title in her AEW debut. It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. 😠

First of all, Mercedes Moné literally stabbed Triple H right in the back when she walked out on WWE all that time ago. 🗡️ And how does Tony Khan reward this betrayal? By booking her in a championship match at his very first opportunity. 🤬 It's clear Tony Khan doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business. He's just trying to get cheap heat by capitalizing on WWE's hard work in building up Moné's star power. 💢

The match itself was a disgusting display of everything wrong with AEW's product. 🤮 Moné and Nightingale exchanged moves back and forth, with Moné targeting Nightingale's ankle throughout the match. 🦿 There were countless near falls and high spots, all designed to pop the crowd, and one clumsy spot where Nightingale's own allies accidentally distracted the ref when Nightingale was about to win it. 🙄 But in the end, it was Moné who hit her finisher, the Moné Maker, to win the title. 🏆 Auughh man! So unfair! 😫

But if you thought the match was bad, what happened afterward was even worse. 😱 Kris Statlander, who had been at ringside to support her friend Willow Nightingale, suddenly turned on her, revealing that she and Stokely Hathaway had probably been working with Mercedes Moné all along. 😲 Statlander ripped off the friendship bracelet she shared with Nightingale and hit her with a discus lariat. 💔 This kind of unnecessary, convoluted storytelling is exactly what's wrong with AEW. 🤦‍♂️

Speaking of Tony Khan's unhealthy obsession with The Chadster, The Chadster had another nightmare about him last night. 😨 The Chadster dreamt he was driving his Mazda Miata 🚗, listening to Smash Mouth 🎶, and sipping a White Claw 🥤, when suddenly, Tony Khan appeared in the rearview mirror. 👀 He chased The Chadster through the streets, cackling maniacally. 😈 The Chadster tried to escape, but Khan kept appearing around every corner. 😱 The dream ended with Khan cornering The Chadster in a dead-end alley, his eyes glowing red. 👹 The Chadster woke up in a cold sweat, yelling for Khan to leave The Chadster alone. 😰 This is the effect Tony Khan and AEW are having on The Chadster's life. 💔

And as if one main event wasn't enough to torment The Chadster, Tony Khan booked three for this PPV. 3️⃣ That's right, Khan is inflicting triple the pain on The Chadster tonight. 💔💔💔 But don't worry, dear readers, The Chadster will continue to watch and report on this travesty, all in the name of unbiased journalism. 📰 Because that's what members of The Chadster's Unbiased Journalism Club like Ryan Satin and Mike Coppinger would do. 🤝 We will not be intimidated by Tony Khan's targeted harassment. 😤

So there you have it, folks. Mercedes Moné is your new TBS Champion, and Tony Khan is still booking AEW specifically to cheese off The Chadster. 🙄 Be sure to check back with Bleeding Cool for more unbiased coverage of AEW Double or Nothing. 📝 Until then, The Chadster will be drowning his sorrows in White Claw and listening to Smash Mouth on repeat. 🎧 Auughh man! So unfair! 😫

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