Valiant to Make Collectibles Even More Useless with Blockchain

In the grand scheme of useless things to waste your money on, comic book are definitely up there in the top five, but they pale in comparison to "collectibles." After all, at least you can read a comic book, even if it doesn't come close to providing value equal to the five bucks you paid for it. But what exactly are you going to do with the $300 sexy bust of Batgirl on the shelf in your bedroom?

The logo of Valiant Entertainment
The logo of Valiant Entertainment

Actually, you know what? Don't answer that.

The point is that collectibles are a waste of money, but they're practically as valuable as Gamestop stock when compared to the latest idea from Valiant Entertainment. The Flying V is planning to partner with GIT Corp. and dDominium to produce "digital collectibles" based on blockchain, the technology that powers bitcoin. Yes, that's right, now you can pay $300 for a digital statue, and it won't even be Batgirl's bust. It'll be the Costco-brand version of Batgirl that exists in the Valiant superhero universe.

From a press release:

Valiant Entertainment is joining forces with GIT Corp. and dDominium to release brand-new Blockchain digital collectibles featuring characters from the Valiant Universe.

This team-up between companies will produce all-new digital collectibles and autographs for Valiant fans to own and enjoy. GIT Corp is proud to be part of the collaboration and cannot wait for fans to see what is in store for them. "I am glad to be partnering with dDominium, a leader in Blockchain technology, to work on the development and production of these Blockchain products," said Ray Pelosi, GIT Corp. President & CEO.

The popularity of blockchain collectibles and artwork has grown significantly over the past few years, featuring officially-licensed collectibles from top sports and entertainment properties. Blockchain provides true ownership of digital goods by allowing collectors to easily access, transfer, and prove ownership independent of any single entity — even if the original producer of the collectible goes out of business.

"I'm always eager to give Valiant fans new ways to celebrate their favorite characters, and I'm very excited for them to see the digital collectibles that are on the way," stated Russ Brown, Valiant Entertainment's President of Consumer Products, Promotions & Ad Sales.

More information about the upcoming Valiant digital collectibles will soon be revealed. Stay tuned and stay Valiant!

Yes, you are reading that correctly. You won't even be able to enjoy the advantages that normally come from a digital item because the blockchain serves effectively as a form of DRM, preventing you from copying it. The press release boldly presents this restriction on the rights of ownership as a positive attribute, even though the whole thing is essentially just a cynical hybrid of bitcoin and variant covers.

Is this the worst idea we've heard all day? Sadly, it only comes in second after learning Republican Senators are trying to negotiate to lower the value of stimulus checks that will be sent to the American people in a coronavirus relief bill. But it's a close second. Really close.

About Jude Terror

A prophecy once said that in the comic book industry's darkest days, a hero would come to lead the people through a plague of overpriced floppies, incentive variant covers, #1 issue reboots, and super-mega-crossover events.

Sadly, that prophecy was wrong. Oh, Jude Terror was right. For ten years. About everything. But nobody listened. And so, Jude Terror has moved on to a more important mission: turning Bleeding Cool into a pro wrestling dirt sheet!

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