Dave Bautista Finds Forbidden Love in "Crazy" Trump Election Witness

Former WWE wrestler and Hollywood megastar Dave Bautista has long been involved in a feud with fellow WWE Hall-of-Famer President Donald Trump. Bautista tweets so often and so regularly about Trump that Bleeding Cool has created an entire section of the website dedicated to articles reporting on it. But in the latest shocking twist in this ongoing saga, Bautista has admitted he's attracted to a woman who went viral after giving comically ridiculous testimony in Michigan as a star witness in Trump's legal attempts to overturn the results of the election, which he lost.

Dave Bautista is involved in a long-running feud with fellow WWE Hall-of-Famer President Donald Trump
Dave Bautista is involved in a long-running feud with fellow WWE Hall-of-Famer President Donald Trump.

"I can't stop watching this!" Bautista tweeted of a video of the testimony. "This chic is bonkers! I guarantee you someone is going to pitch her for a reality TV show."

But The Animal's animosity soon turned to something else. One fan responded to Bautista's tweet to ask, "Am I the only one that finds her kinda attractive, but in a crazy kinda way?" Bautista responded by agreeing. "No. We've all dated this girl. Females as well! We've all been through a relationship with this crazy bitch!"

We don't know anything about that woman other than from the widely-circulated video, but could there be a possible love connection here? And if these two crazy kids can find love in this messed up world, does that mean there might be hope for the rest of us? And sure, I hear what you're saying: "Jude Terror, did you just say you didn't bother to find out anything about the woman you're reporting on? Aren't you supposed to be some kind of journalist?" And the answer is, none of that matters. Because maybe Dave Bautista and crazy Trump woman be the Christmas miracle love story that saves the nation from divisiveness and ushers in a new era of peace and civility. And maybe then Bleeding Cool Editor-in-Chief Kaitlyn Booth will finally allow me to leave the basement and stop producing clickbait articles about a pro wrestler's political tweets?! [Editor's Note: Jude, I see by this paragraph that you're getting lazy with your research. I think it's time we talk about increasing your minimum article requirements.]

Well, we can all dream.

About Jude Terror

A prophecy once said that in the comic book industry's darkest days, a hero would come to lead the people through a plague of overpriced floppies, incentive variant covers, #1 issue reboots, and super-mega-crossover events.

Sadly, that prophecy was wrong. Oh, Jude Terror was right. For ten years. About everything. But nobody listened. And so, Jude Terror has moved on to a more important mission: turning Bleeding Cool into a pro wrestling dirt sheet!

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