Posted in: Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: Jackie Redmond, wrestling

Jackie Redmond Rises in WWE with New On-Screen Role on WWE Raw

Comrades, rejoice as Jackie Redmond conquers new WWE duties, proving socialism triumphs in the wrestling world! Viva la Revolución!

Published Tue, 27 Jun 2023 11:07:10 -0500

by El Presidente

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Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from a secret underground lair beneath a highly overpriced American wrestling merchandise store in Clearwater, Florida. As we all know, I am an expert in both the delicate arts of tyranny and the glorious world of wrestling. I have emerged from my underground bunker, where I was locked in an intense five-hour strategy session with Kim Jong-Un on the best way to help Dominik Mysterio defeat Cody Rhodes at Money in the Bank. But enough about my fabulous exploits, for now, let us focus on some earth-shattering news from the world of WWE and Jackie Redmond.

Jackie Redmond hosts a WWE Raw recap episode

Rejoice, comrades, for I bring to you today the exciting announcement that our beloved socialist sister, the talented Jackie Redmond, is expanding her role within the WWE empire. In a press release from the WWE, they revealed that Jackie will "serve as a backstage interviewer for Monday Night Raw, alongside Byron Saxton" starting this July 1st. But hold on to your Che Guevara berets, for that is not the end of her rapid ascent!

The WWE confirmed that comrade Redmond will also "join Kayla Braxton to co-host WWE's premium live event kickoff shows with Booker T and Peter Rosenberg." Truly, the winds of socialism have blessed this noble warrior with opportunities that even the heartless American CIA could not sabotage!

No stranger to the world of sports broadcasting, Jackie Redmond boasts an impressive résumé, including more than 10 years in the industry. She has showcased her prowess as a host and reporter for NHL Network, WBD Sports, and Rogers Sportsnet in the far north, a.k.a. Canada. She has had a taste of the cultural revolution that is WWE since 2021, serving as the co-host of Raw Talk and Talking Smack. Fear not, comrades, for, during hockey season, Redmond will continue to serve the proletariats at NHL Network and WBD Sports.

As for her fellow comrade Megan Morant, she too will take on an expanded full-time role at WWE's Stamford studios. Morant will be the host of Raw Talk, SmackDown LowDown, international shows for television, and various digital shows, including the Monday Night Raw's sidecast on Twitch. I will be watching closely, my fellow revolutionaries, taking notes on how to make our own socialist Twitch streams flourish no matter the number of handsaws the CIA sends us.

Finally, we have Cathy Kelley's transition to Friday Night SmackDown, where she will join the effervescent Kayla Braxton as backstage interviewer. These developments have your dear leader, El Presidente, most excited, and I shall celebrate by hosting a Lucha Libre tournament in my palace garden, with Vladimir Putin and Bashar al-Assad as honorary judges.

So comrades, let us raise our glasses of fine socialist wine and toast to the incredible rise of Jackie Redmond and her fellow warrior women within the WWE. May they continue to inspire our socialist dreams and throw metaphorical suplexes at the ignorant capitalist pigs who seek to destroy our progress. Viva la Revolución!

Until our paths cross again, my faithful followers, I bid you adieu. Your ever-watchful leader, El Presidente, shall return with more juicy news from the world of wrestling and beyond. Until then, stay vigilant and remember: In the immortal words of Karl Marx… "WOOOO!"

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