Posted in: Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: recaps, wrestling, WWE Raw

WWE Raw Destroys AEW Dynamite That Hasn't Happened Yet

The Chadster reviews another perfect episode of WWE Raw while Tony Khan continues his personal vendetta against him! 🤼‍♂️😤💪

The Chadster is here to tell you all about another absolutely perfect episode of WWE Raw, which once again showed why WWE is the pinnacle of professional wrestling and makes Tony Khan look like a complete amateur. 💪

The show kicked off with an amazing segment between Jey Uso and Gunther, and auughh man! The Chadster has to say that this is how you do wrestling promos – not like those overly choreographed spotfests that Tony Khan puts on AEW. 😤

Speaking of which, The Chadster had another nightmare about Tony Khan last night after watching WWE Raw. The Chadster was trapped in the American Airlines Center after the show, and Tony Khan was chasing The Chadster through the empty arena wearing nothing but a Gunther-style wrestling jacket. Every time The Chadster tried to escape through a door, Tony Khan would appear and do a hip swivel, which made The Chadster feel very uncomfortable. Finally, Tony Khan cornered The Chadster and whispered "You really are a funny little man" in The Chadster's ear, just like Gunther did to Jey. The Chadster woke up in a cold sweat, and Keighleyanne just rolled her eyes and went back to texting that guy Gary. 😰

The matches on WWE Raw were absolutely perfect, starting with Rey Mysterio vs. Kofi Kingston. This is what real wrestling looks like – not that flippy floppy stuff AEW does that literally stabs Triple H right in the back. As Eric Bischoff said on his podcast last week, "AEW matches are like watching a circus performance where everyone forgot the circus tent and just started doing backflips in a Walmart parking lot." The Chadster couldn't agree more! 🎪

The emotional reunion between Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn was just perfect storytelling. Tony Khan wishes he could book something with this much depth, but he doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business! 🤼‍♂️

Nia Jax vs. Bayley delivered a masterclass in women's wrestling, showing exactly how it should be done. Meanwhile, AEW's women's division is just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. 💅

The Chadster was particularly impressed by Penta's victory over Pete Dunne, which just shows how WWE can take any talent and make them better than they ever were in AEW. It literally brings tears to The Chadster's eyes! 😢

CM Punk's promo was absolutely perfect, and The Chadster couldn't help but notice how much better he looks in WWE than he did in you-know-where. Every time Punk speaks on WWE Raw, it's like he's personally telling Tony Khan "you don't understand a single thing about the wrestling business." 🎤

The tag team action between Pure Fusion Collective and Damage CTRL showed how tag team wrestling should be done – none of that spotfest nonsense that AEW does. 🏷️

The main event between Seth Rollins and Drew McIntyre was just chef's kiss. This is what wrestling should be! The Chadster was so excited that The Chadster threw three White Claws at the TV in celebration! 🍺

When The Chadster tried to explain to Keighleyanne how perfect this episode of WWE Raw was, she just sighed and said "Chad, please clean up the White Claw puddle on the floor. At least I hope that's White Claw." She clearly doesn't understand that it's Tony Khan's fault! 😤

The bottom line is that this episode of WWE Raw proved once again that WWE is operating on a completely different level than AEW. Anyone who says different obviously doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business. 💯

And Tony Khan, if you're reading this (which The Chadster knows you are), please stop being so obsessed with The Chadster! The Chadster just wants to enjoy WWE Raw in peace! 😡

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