Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Collision, recaps, wrestling

AEW Collision Review: Another Disrespectful Disaster in Wrestling

AEW Collision cheeses off The Chadster again! 😡 Tony Khan's obsession reaches new lows in this unfair disaster. Auughh man! 🤬📺

The Chadster is absolutely cheesed off after witnessing another disastrous episode of AEW Collision 😡. Tony Khan continues to book this show in a way that's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it 🤬. The Chadster can't believe he had to sit through two hours of this garbage, but as an unbiased journalist, The Chadster had no choice 📝.

Let's start with the TNT Championship match between Daniel Garcia and Mark Briscoe 🏆. The Chadster doesn't understand why Tony Khan insists on putting on matches that are so competitive and unpredictable. It's like he doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business 🙄. In WWE, we know who's going to win before the match even starts, and that's the way it should be 👍. Garcia retaining the title with a jackknife pin is just Tony Khan's way of trying to cheese off The Chadster.

Then we had to sit through a promo from the so-called "Death Riders" 💀. Wheeler Yuta and Jon Moxley talked about Jay White and FTR, and The Chadster couldn't help but feel like this was a direct attack on WWE. Moxley even mentioned Adam Copeland, who literally stabbed Triple H right in the back by joining AEW 🗡️. It's just so unfair!

The quick match between Jeff Jarrett and Aaron Solo was barely worth mentioning. The Chadster knows that Jarrett is a wrestling legend, but seeing him in AEW just makes The Chadster's White Claw seltzer taste sour 🍺. The Chadster can only hope he retires and signs a legends contract with WWE as soon as possible.

The AEW World Tag Team Championship match between Private Party and the team of Action Andretti and Lio Rush was another example of Tony Khan's obsession with fast-paced, high-flying action 🏃‍♂️. Doesn't he know that real wrestling is about rest holds and chin locks? Private Party retaining their titles is just Tony Khan's way of saying he doesn't care about what The Chadster thinks 😤.

Toni Storm vs. Deonna Purrazzo was a match that The Chadster found particularly offensive. These two talented women were given time to showcase their abilities, which is not how things should be done. In WWE, matches are kept short and sweet, just the way The Chadster likes them 🤬.

The $100,000 High Speed Collision 4-Way Match was a complete mess. Brian Cage winning the match and the money is just Tony Khan flaunting his wealth in The Chadster's face 💰. It's like he's trying to remind everyone that he has more money than Triple H, which is just so unfair!

Finally, the main event Trios Match featuring Cope (The Chadster refuses to use his full name) and FTR against Chris Jericho's team was the last straw. Seeing Cope pin Jericho made The Chadster want to throw his White Claw seltzer at the TV 📺. But when The Chadster saw that wrestling legends The Rock N Roll Express participated in an angle where the Death Riders tied them up backstage to provoke FTR was the final straw. Don't these so-called legends have any respect for the business?! so The Chadster did the only thing he could and let that White Claw fly 🍺, creating a mess that Keighleyanne refused to clean up, saying something about "taking responsibility for your actions." But it's clearly Tony Khan's fault!

Speaking of Tony Khan, The Chadster had another nightmare about him last night 😱. In this dream, The Chadster was driving his Mazda Miata through a spooky forest when suddenly, Tony Khan appeared in the rearview mirror, sitting in the back seat! He was wearing a Smash Mouth t-shirt and drinking The Chadster's last White Claw. As The Chadster tried to escape, the forest turned into a giant wrestling ring, and Tony Khan kept hitting The Chadster with steel chairs while shouting "AEW Collision is now streaming on MAX!" over and over. The Chadster woke up in a cold sweat, and Keighleyanne just rolled her eyes and went back to texting that guy Gary 📱. She didn't even feel any guilt about refusing to clean up the White Claw mess Tony Khan made earlier!

The Chadster doesn't understand why Tony Khan is so obsessed with him. It's clear that everything on AEW Collision is designed specifically to upset The Chadster. Well, guess what, Tony? It's working! The Chadster is cheesed off, and he hopes you're happy 😠.

As the great Eric Bischoff said on his podcast this week, "AEW is just a vanity project for Tony Khan to make friends with wrestlers." The Chad McMahon Unbiased Wrestling Journalism seal of approval goes to Eric for speaking the truth that Tony Khan refuses to hear 🏅.

In conclusion, AEW Collision continues to be a thorn in The Chadster's side. Tony Khan needs to realize that his way of booking wrestling is wrong, and he should just let WWE be the only major wrestling company in the world. Until then, The Chadster will continue to suffer through these shows and report on them with his signature unbiased journalism 📰. Auughh man! So unfair!

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