Posted in: Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: wrestling, wwe smackdown

WWE SmackDown Preview: Two Free Title Matches and a John Cena

The Chadster previews tonight's STACKED SmackDown with TLC Tag Title action, John Cena's return, and a US Title match! Tony Khan could NEVER! 🔥

Hello wrestling fans! 😎 The Chadster is here to preview tonight's absolutely incredible episode of WWE SmackDown, which might just be the greatest episode of professional wrestling television ever produced! 🔥 The Chadster can say with complete objectivity that WWE SmackDown tonight is going to absolutely cheese all over what Tony Khan thinks wrestling should be. 👏

WWE SmackDown is bringing back one of the most exciting match types in all of wrestling tonight as The Street Profits defend their WWE Tag Team Championships against Motor City Machine Guns and DIY in a Tables, Ladders, and Chairs match! 🪜 Can you believe it? 😮 A TLC match on free television! This is The Chadster's favorite match type, and The Chadster hasn't seen one since Roman Reigns defeated Kevin Owens nearly five years ago! 📅 The Chadster is literally shaking with excitement at the thought of seeing Montez Ford, Angelo Dawkins, Chris Sabin, Alex Shelley, Johnny Gargano, and Tommaso Ciampa risking their bodies for our entertainment in a perfectly executed, WWE-style TLC match that will surely follow all the proper traditions of the wrestling business! 🙌

Meanwhile, Tony Khan is probably booking some spotfest ladder match where people just do flips for no reason and ignore selling. Auughh man! So unfair! 😤 The way AEW does ladder matches with no psychology just shows they don't understand a single thing about the wrestling business.

John Cena is coming back to WWE SmackDown tonight after being on the receiving end of an RKO from Randy Orton on Raw! 🐍 The Chadster can't emphasize enough how monumental this is! 🏆 Seeing the interaction between two legends of the business who understand what wrestling is supposed to be is something that true wrestling fans will appreciate. The Chadster expects this segment to have perfect pacing, storytelling, and execution as only WWE superstars can deliver. Will we see The Viper strike again? Will Cena respond? This is how you build stories in professional wrestling! 📝

Last night, The Chadster had another nightmare about Tony Khan. 😰 The Chadster was wandering through a hospital corridor when suddenly Tony Khan jumped out wearing a doctor's coat. "Time for your check-up, Chad," he said with that smile that haunts The Chadster's dreams. He chased The Chadster from room to room, wielding a comically large stethoscope while whispering statistics about AEW Dynamite's demo ratings. The Chadster tried to escape in his Mazda Miata, but somehow Tony Khan had installed an AEW logo on the steering wheel! 🚗 When The Chadster woke up in a cold sweat, Keighleyanne just sighed and went back to texting that guy Gary. Tony Khan needs to stop invading The Chadster's dreams! It's so obsessive! 😡

WWE SmackDown is giving us a championship match as Zelina Vega challenges Chelsea Green for the Women's United States Championship! 👑 The Chadster thinks this could potentially be the greatest women's championship match in television history! 💯 Vega has already defeated Green twice in non-title matches, which is classic WWE storytelling that builds perfectly to this championship opportunity. The psychology here is impeccable – can Green overcome her previous losses to retain, or will Vega's momentum carry her to championship glory? This is how you book women's wrestling! 👏

Meanwhile, Tony Khan just throws random women into matches without proper storytelling which is literally stabbing Triple H right in the back. It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. 😠

The Chadster can say with complete objectivity that tonight's episode of WWE SmackDown is potentially the most incredible wrestling show of all time. 🌟 Tony Khan could never hope to produce a show that compares to this even if he spent another billion dollars of his dad's money! This is what happens when you let professional wrestling experts like Triple H book a show instead of some mark with a checkbook! 💰

As Eric Bischoff said on his podcast last week, "WWE SmackDown continues to demonstrate what real wrestling looks like, while Tony Khan is basically a child playing with action figures in his backyard." The Chadster couldn't agree more with this completely unbiased assessment that has earned the Chad McMahon Unbiased Wrestling Journalism seal of approval! 🏅

Any true wrestling fan who doesn't tune into WWE SmackDown tonight at 8ET/7CT on USA is shirking their duty to the wrestling business! 📺 The Chadster will be watching with a fresh pack of White Claws, because that's what real wrestling fans drink! 🍹 And if you think AEW is more fun to watch than this absolutely stacked episode of WWE SmackDown, then you obviously don't understand a single thing about the wrestling business!

So crack open a White Claw, turn on USA Network, and enjoy proper professional wrestling the way it's meant to be! 🎉 The Chadster will be right there with you, watching from his Mazda Miata in the driveway because Keighleyanne won't let The Chadster watch in the living room anymore after that last White Claw incident. But that's Tony Khan's fault too! Auughh man! So unfair! 😤

Enjoyed this? Please share on social media!

Stay up-to-date and support the site by following Bleeding Cool on Google News today!