wwe smackdown Archives

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from a luxury yacht that I definitely did not seize from a fleeing oligarch, and I have just finished watching last night's episode of WWE SmackDown — the final stop before WrestleMania 42! I must say, comrades, this go-home show was much like[...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my luxurious panic room where I am currently hiding from both my cabinet members asking about the missing treasury funds AND my ex-wife's divorce lawyers, and I have some electrifying news for you! Tonight's episode of WWE SmackDown promises to be the[...]

Both of those columns have now been proven even MORE correct by what happened on WWE SmackDown last night, which The Chadster is going to break down for you in painstaking, unbiased detail 👀📰 Randy Orton and Pat McAfee depart WWE SmackDown, carrying the WWE Championship that belongs to Cody Rhodes. But first, The Chadster has to[...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from a repurposed Soviet submarine currently docked somewhere in the Caribbean, where I have just finished watching last night's episode of WWE SmackDown on a television I liberated from a luxury resort! And what an episode it was, comrades—a mixture of genuine brilliance,[...]

It is this latter category that World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) appears to have stumbled into, perhaps deliberately, perhaps recklessly, with the Pat McAfee angle on this week's edition of WWE SmackDown, and the implications for WrestleMania and the broader creative trajectory of the company deserve serious examination. Pat McAfee taunts the WWE Universe during WWE SmackDown. For[...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my golden bunker beneath the presidential palace, where I am preparing for tonight's episode of WWE SmackDown with a bottle of confiscated champagne and a bowl of popcorn made from corn seized from dissidents! Randy Orton and Pat McAfee share a moment after[...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from a secret jacuzzi hidden beneath the presidential palace in an undisclosed tropical nation, and I have just finished watching last night's episode of WWE SmackDown, which was so packed with betrayal, violence, and scheming that it reminded me of my last cabinet[...]

Auughh man! So unfair! 😤😤😤 The Chadster woke up this morning in his cozy nest inside the abandoned Blockbuster Video, surrounded by his beloved raccoon family, and The Chadster just knew that tonight's episode of WWE SmackDown would be absolutely spectacular! 🎉🎊✨ Vincent K Raccoon was already chittering excitedly, while Linda Raccoon had organized all[...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from a secret bunker beneath a disused churro factory in an undisclosed South American location, where I have just finished watching last night's episode of WWE SmackDown and I am positively vibrating with revolutionary excitement! What an episode, comrades! What drama! What betrayal![...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my solid gold hot tub deep within my presidential palace, where I am preparing for what promises to be one of the most explosive episodes of WWE SmackDown in recent memory! Tonight's show airs at 8 ET/7 CT on USA, and I[...]

The Chadster is absolutely THRILLED to tell you all about tonight's episode of WWE SmackDown, which promises to be quite possibly the greatest wrestling show ever produced in the history of television! 🎉🎊🏆 The Chadster has been preparing all day in the abandoned Blockbuster with Vincent K Raccoon, Linda Raccoon, Hunter Raccoon, Stephanie Raccoon, and[...]

Welcome, true wrestling fans! 🎉 The Chadster is here to tell you about what may very well be the most incredible, most spectacular, most perfectly-crafted episode of professional wrestling television that has ever been broadcast in the history of the business! 🙌 That's right, WWE SmackDown airs tonight at 8 ET/7 CT on USA Network,[...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my luxury yacht currently anchored off the coast of Venezuela (the CIA thinks I'm in Paraguay, haw haw haw!), and I have just witnessed the most shockingly predictable event in professional wrestling history on WWE SmackDown! Yes, my friends, as everyone expected,[...]

But enough about my troubles – let us discuss the creative catastrophe unfolding tonight on WWE SmackDown! The official logo for WWE SmackDown Ah, comrades, if there is one thing I have learned from my many years of running a dictatorship – I mean, a "people's democracy" – it is that when your creative vision runs dry,[...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my luxury bunker beneath the presidential palace where I am enjoying a fine cigar and preparing my viewing throne for tonight's episode of WWE SmackDown! And what a glorious night it promises to be, comrades, as WWE SmackDown serves as the final[...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from a luxury underground bunker somewhere beneath the Florida Everglades — I cannot be more specific because the CIA has drones circling overhead — and I have just finished watching last night's episode of WWE SmackDown, which was so packed with action that[...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from the presidential hot tub overlooking the beautiful coast of my glorious nation, where the water is warm, the cocktails are socialist, and tonight's episode of WWE SmackDown promises to be hotter than the time Fidel Castro and I accidentally set fire to[...]

Last night's WWE SmackDown was absolutely phenomenal, and The Chadster is here to give the readers the only truly unbiased, objective review they're going to find anywhere on the internet 😤📝 The Chadster watched this incredible episode of WWE SmackDown from the cozy confines of the abandoned Blockbuster Video that The Chadster now calls home,[...]

The Chadster is SO EXCITED right now that The Chadster can barely contain it! 😍 Tonight's episode of WWE SmackDown is shaping up to be potentially the most incredible wrestling show of all time, and The Chadster has been preparing all day long with the raccoon family here at Blockbuster headquarters! 🦝🦝🦝 Vincent K Raccoon[...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my luxury skybox at the Spectrum Center in Charlotte, North Carolina, where I have just witnessed the glorious spectacle that was last night's WWE SmackDown! And let me tell you, comrades, this episode of SmackDown had more twists and turns than the[...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my gold-plated hot tub overlooking the beautiful coastline of my presidential compound, and I have got some spectacular news for you tonight! WWE SmackDown is upon us once again, airing at 8 ET/7 CT on USA, and the card looks more stacked[...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my gold-plated viewing box at the Riyadh Season Stadium, where I am getting ready to experience the magic of the Royal Rumble, just after I regale you with a tale of how WWE SmackDown delivered a show so thrilling, it reminded me[...]

Tonight, WWE SmackDown comes to us with a card so stacked, it reminds me of the time I helped Fidel Castro organize his record collection—alphabetically by artist, chronologically by release date, and sorted by how much each album insulted American imperialism! The official logo for WWE SmackDown But comrades, before we dive into the glorious action that[...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my luxury bunker beneath the Presidential Palace, where I have just finished watching last night's episode of WWE SmackDown from the beautiful city of Montreal! And let me tell you, comrades, this episode of WWE SmackDown delivered more excitement than the time[...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my luxurious bunker beneath the Presidential Palace where I am carefully monitoring tonight's episode of WWE SmackDown, which airs at 8/7c on USA Network! And let me tell you, comrades, tonight's SmackDown is packed with more excitement than the time I had[...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my state-of-the-art home theater bunker, where I have just finished watching WWE SmackDown from London, England! And what a spectacular episode of SmackDown it was, filled with more qualifying matches than the time Fidel Castro and I held tryouts to see who[...]

Auughh man! So unfair! 😤😤😤 The Chadster can barely contain his excitement for tonight's episode of WWE SmackDown, which promises to be the single greatest wrestling program ever broadcast in the history of entertainment! 📺✨ While Tony Khan is probably somewhere crying into his pathetic little energy drinks, WWE SmackDown is about to deliver the[...]

Auughh man! So unfair! 😤😤😤 The Chadster has to tell you all about last night's absolutely perfect episode of WWE SmackDown, and The Chadster just knows that Tony Khan was probably watching from his palatial mansion, seething with jealousy at how Triple H understands the wrestling business in ways Khan never could! 📺✨ Jacob Fatu interferes[...]

The Chadster is absolutely thrilled to bring you the preview for what might literally be the greatest episode of WWE SmackDown in television history! 😍🏆 Tonight's WWE SmackDown is going to showcase everything that makes WWE the pinnacle of sports entertainment, and The Chadster can't wait to watch it with his new raccoon family here[...]

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from my luxury bunker deep beneath the Presidential Palace, where I have just finished watching WWE SmackDown on a television I definitely did not steal from the American Embassy during last year's diplomatic incident And comrades, let me tell you, this week's episode[...]