Posted in: Comics | Tagged: Comics, panels

Last Week's Comics In Seventeen Panels

Published Wed, 15 Aug 2012 06:00:49 -0500

Dr Manolis Vamvounis writes for Bleeding Cool;

It's the twentieth "Panels" column in its current incarnation. Time flies by quickly when you're pissing people off! Taking your comments into account I've tried to feature more non-Marvel/DC books here and this was a good week for it too.

Last Week in Panels:

IT REALLY *IS* ALL A MASONIC CONSPIRACY AGAINST US

Or maybe Fred Van Lente is working through some issues after the cancellation of his HERCULES book over at Marvel. ARCHER AND ARMSTRONG #1 is a strong relaunch of the Valiant book for a new generation. The tightly wound sect kid with a near-encyclopedic knowledge of every martial art, paired up with the immortal bruiser he was trained his whole life to assassinate, together up against his parents and their shady backers. You don't get more classic comic book odd couple/buddy comedy than this really. A flawlessly executed debut issue that already has most everyone buzzing.

STOP CRYING LIKE A LITTLE GIRL!

Not you, me. SPIDER-MEN #4 is the single best issue of Bendis' entire comics-writing career. I occasionally have my issues with the man, but this book had me in uncontrollable sobs every single time I dared go through it again. And I did, over and over and over again. It's a humanizing approach towards the craziness of time travel and dimension-hopping that few have attempted. The kids (Miles Morales with Ultimate Gwen) sitting around with the "visiting" adult Peter Parker, talking about the differences and similarities of their worlds. At once a peek into their future that could have been and a strange alternate reality. Painfully subtle at points while gut-wrenchingly obvious when it really needs to throw an emotional punch. This really is the perfect timing for this crossover. Not for a by-the-numbers meeting of two alternate versions of the character, but instead a jarring non-reunion of people who have suffered terrible losses and now get a chance to help each other heal and cope.

VAMPIRELLA DON'T SPARKLE

This is my shameless plug of the week. My best bud Ilias Kyriazis (Ghostbusters, Galaxy Quest, Melody, Falling for Lionheart) is illustrating the VAMPIRELLA ANNUAL #2, pitting "Vampi" (seriously don't call her that to her face) versus TWILIGHT – or rather their nerd-raged fans and the real vampires who plan to prey on them in the middle of an Edward-Bella themed town. It's a departure from "sexy Vampirella" with a few genuine dramatic chills in a surprisingly touching story that serves as a commentary on obsessive fan culture. I'd have preferred to see the story in a more muted, Twilight-ish palette to better contrast Vampirella's classic leotard and fit the ominous tone of the story. It all tends to blend together here, although the ghastly horror of the art still pushes through at the appropriate junctures.

I SEE DEAD SHEEP

It's ghoul sheep hauntings, cat-craving goblins and Knights Templar K-9 history galore in the BEASTS OF BURDEN: NEIGHBOURHOOD WATCH special. Three cute (and stunningly beautiful thanks to Jill Thompson's fully painted art) stories with a bit of a bite, starring the mystery-solving pack of neighbourhood dogs who take care of their own against an endless parade of fittingly cutified (but not defanged) versions of popular horror and myth tropes.

PRETTY IN PINK

GAMBIT #1 isn't nowhere near as smart and ground-breaking as last week's HAWKEYE. It manages to hold its own in the impossible task of redeeming the once ultra-popular breakthrough character of the 90s and polishing him off for a new decade, after years upon years of bad writing had degraded him to a walking bad stereotype. James Asmus goes back to the very core of the character: a daredevil-ish, charming thief of a rogue, a James Bond type with gray shades of lawfulness who treats the world as a film noir. It's got intense over-the-top explosions, gimmicks and questionable dames to spare in a rather sexy package of Clay Mann art. But how could you possibly keep this up long enough to justify an ongoing series?

THE WAYNE BUNCH

One of the things I was so glad to see survive through the relaunch was the legacy of the Robins (even -sadly- without Steph). They're such a diverse group, even if at first glance they might appear like a family of clones. In BATMAN AND ROBIN #12 we see them all briefly in action together, wrapping up Damian's recent quest for reaffirmation of his place in the legacy as the latest and bestest of them. In other news, Batman gets a way cool new armour upgrade and Patrick Gleason remains the best Bat-artist of the decade.

BAT-TLE ROYALE

Oh come on, NOONE has used that pun before? The Batwoman cameo in BATGIRL #12 was one of the most anticipated of the DCNu but failed to really go into the meat of what sets these two women apart and what common ground they might find. Batgirl is indeed lacking physically opposed to the very aggressive and to-the-point older (?) Batwoman, but there's no counter-evidence provided to push Babs' case as an equally worthy hero. I'll say this though, yelling UNCLE is a surprisingly mature way to dispel these heroic misunderstanding-fueled "friendly" brawls.

SCREW STEPHANIE BROWN

I'm starting a "HARPER ROW FOR BATGIRL/ROBIN" petition. Sign in the comments section below. Scott Snyder's mysterious punk girl gets her secret origin in BATMAN #12 and it's a smart and emotional little tale including a brave (especially by DC standards) stance against teen bullying and homophobia – and a nice nod to Tim Drake's origins as Robin. Pity about the VERY disorienting artist swap a few pages before the finish line. Here's one situation where I would have definitely been ok with a week's delay to get the whole over-sized issue with Cloonan art. A very unconventional (but perfect) fit for this book.

IT TAKES TWO BULLIES TO MAKE A HERO

VENOM #22 wraps up Rick Remender's run on the title that succeeded in the impossible: launching a successful solo title for Flash Thompson AND/OR Venom that was both original in action and rich in character. This last issue (of the run, not the title) looks back at Flash's bully beginnings with an honest and a rare retro/intro/spective look at the circle of abuse. It's a great opportunity to go back and read up on one of Marvel's best books out right now.

WE'RE ALL DOCTORS HERE

Poor Cap is the token army jock in a room full of doctors and professors during the Illuminati's latest meeting of minds in NEW AVENGERS #29. This story takes a rare look at the counter-argument of this story from the Avengers POV. What if the Phoenix Five ARE good for the world and it's the heroes that are terrified of the change to consider weighing their losses and gains from this scenario? It's a sort of moral subtlety that's lost in the main series

RESPECT WHERE IT'S DUE

Jae Lee's storytelling in BEFORE WATCHMEN: OZYMANDIAS #2 is quite often revolutionary. Just follow the action on this page, through the "perfect trajectory" of his hurled headband. It would be great to see him as a guest-artist on J.H Williams III's BATWOMAN.

WHEN IT-GIRL TOUCHED GROUND ON THE DCNU

(Get it? Because she has the power to take on the properties of anything she touches!)

Subtle, boys. Jamie S. Rich and Mike Norton relaunch Mike Allred's quintessential cute mod girl into her own series with a supporting cast of the remaining (again, mostly female) members of the mutant beatniks turned retro heroes, the Atomics. A rather large chunk of IT GIRL AND THE ATOMICS #1 is spent on a dirty homage to DC's current attitude towards superheroes, all high-collars, unnecessary detailing and generic fist-slinging (and some of you dared call me biased last week), before switching gears to Allred's signature retro-pop superhero sci-fi romance aesthetics for the rest of the issue. The parody may have taken too much of the issue's space to properly acquaint new readers with the character, but this is still a colourful and fun breath of fresh air in a currently grim and gritty superheroic landscape.

YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS

The Apollo and Midnight googly-eye show! We also finally get an in-story explanation for that (indeed hideous) chin spike, Martian Manhunter's departure from the team in a grandiose conventions-busting manner and a whole shitload of floating nefertiti busts. This is as close to real Pete Milligan ingenuity as we've gotten in the DCNu so far.

GOREWATCH

DUCK SAUCE

Of all the imaginative deaths within the first two issues of the weekly DEADPOOL KILLS THE MARVEL UNIVERSE, Howard the Duck's cameo death as a literally cooked and garnished duck dish rang the most unnecessarily brutal (and daring). The murder of the Hulk later in the same issue was unfortunately far less imaginative and something we HAVE seen before, in the Punisher oneshot that started this whole killing craze decades ago. I'm enjoying Cullen Bunn's unique twist on Deadpool here, killing these heroes to put them out of their misery as unknowing victims of the Marvel writers' vicious whims. It's taking the character's trademark meta self-awareness into new dramatic territory.

SPEAKING OF THE PUNISHER AND INSANELY FUN DEATHS

It's -er- Space Hulk strangling Leonard Samson with his own hair! SPACE PUNISHER #2 even has a Deadpool death in it but it's nowhere near the bloody splendor of the above series. Still, a space parody of Frank Castle with painted art by Mark Texeira, it's quite a lure.

NUDITY BUFFER

Emphasis on BUFF! It's a reversal of the usual "flock of virgin sex-slaves for the conquering hero" trope with our maiden Rogue finding herself on the receiving end of an offer of a warrior sex slave troup, in X-MEN LEGACY #271. Why should Gambit have all the fun? It's an amusing little aside in the middle of a largely expositional first part of your standard "stranded in an alien dimension" scenario.

50 SHADES OF WRONG

The entire issue of TAROT WITCH OF THE BLACK ROSE #75 is devoted to the titular witch getting her booty spanked in a variety of imaginative ways by a purple-skinned (and appropriately for the title tattooed and unclad) horny Fairy. If that's your kind of thing.

THE TALLY?

It's a great week to be a comics fan.

BATMAN #12 stood out from DC's offerings as a touching self-contained story that doesn't get overpowered by the message at its core, but Marvel still dominated the week.

VENOM #22 was a great emotional finale to an already classic modern take on the property. GAMBIT #1 was a great return to roots for the once again sexy Cajun. DEADPOOL KILLS THE MARVEL UNIVERSE is the surprise hit of the month that I can't stop talking to people about. SPIDER-MEN #4 is still unquestionably the book of the week, and looks to be an uncontested candidate for Marvel's best book of the year. Just a beautiful human drama piece celebrating everything that we love about Peter Parker and his late Ultimate counterpart.

ARCHER AND ARMSTRONG was also a strong series launch, the most promising of the Valiant line. Plus it gave us the single most brilliant barfing scene in any comic ever (*not written by Garth Ennis):

Smell you later.

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