Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: adam cole, AEW Dynasty, kenny omega, recaps, wrestling

Adam Cole Wins TNT Belt at AEW Dynasty, Ending Garcia Experiment

The Chadster shoots on Adam Cole's title win at AEW Dynasty and Kenny Omega's preposterous triple threat match! Take notes, Tony Khan! 😡

The Chadster has to report on yet another example of Tony Khan trying to cheese off The Chadster personally by booking AEW Dynasty in a way that literally stabs Triple H right in the back! 😡 💔 👎

Adam Cole defeated Daniel Garcia to win the TNT Championship, and The Chadster can't believe how transparent Tony Khan is being right now. 🤦‍♂️ It's so obvious that Tony Khan has completely lost confidence in his homegrown talent like Garcia and had to rely on a former WWE Superstar with proper NXT training to carry the belt. 🏆 This just proves what The Chadster has been saying all along – AEW will never escape WWE's shadow! 🌑

It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. 😤 Tony Khan keeps trying to build his own stars but then ends up putting the belts on WWE-trained talent anyway. Auughh man! So unfair! 😫

The way Cole won the match was particularly offensive to The Chadster. All those near falls and dramatic moments? 😠 That's not how real sports entertainment works! In WWE, matches have a proper pace and structure that respects the audience's intelligence at the right level (which is not at all) instead of just trying to pop them with flashy moves every thirty seconds. 👏 💯

But what happened next was even more outrageous! 🤯 Kenny Omega successfully defended the AEW International Championship against both Speedball Mike Bailey and Ricochet in what can only be described as a complete mockery of everything professional wrestling should be! 🙄

The match was nothing but an endless progression of high-flying, death-defying moves and athletic displays that completely ignore the psychology and storytelling and commercial breaks and occasional product placement that proper WWE matches prioritize. 📉 The Chadster can't believe Tony Khan doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business after all this time. This match took everything AEW is about and cranked it up to eleven, which is the complete antithesis of what sports entertainment is supposed to be, which is WWE! 😱

And don't even get The Chadster started on what happened after the match. 🤬 Kazuchika Okada, the Continental Champion, came out to tease a match with Omega and renew their so-called "storied rivalry." 🙄 This is a direct shot at WWE's legacy because their rivalry happened in NJPW, another company that defies WWE's rightful place as the only true wrestling company in the world. 🌎

This match reminded The Chadster about a nightmare The Chadster had about Tony Khan last week. 😰 The Chadster was driving The Chadster's Mazda Miata through a car wash when suddenly all the spinning brushes turned into Tony Khan's face. 🚗 The brushes were whispering "Adam Cole, bay bay" over and over while pressing against The Chadster's windows. 💦 The Chadster tried to escape but the doors wouldn't open, and Tony Khan's laughter filled the car as soapy water began to rise. 😱 The Chadster woke up sweating with "All Star" by Smash Mouth playing in The Chadster's head. Tony Khan needs to STOP invading The Chadster's dreams! This obsession has gone too far! 😤

As the readers know from reading The Chadster's previous reports about AEW Dynasty tonight, The Chadster had to watch the last two matches on Keighleyanne's iPad since Tony Khan literally forced The Chadster to break the only two televisions in the house. 📺 🔨 Well, Keighleyanne is not going to be happy with Tony Khan because after watching that Omega match, The Chadster had no choice but to throw Keighleyanne's iPad in the garbage can and light it on fire. 🔥 📱

The Chadster tried to explain to Keighleyanne that it was Tony Khan's fault, but she just screamed something about "taking responsibility" and "this being the third electronic device tonight" before storming off to text that guy Gary form her phone, which she refuses to let The Chadster use to watch the last match of AEW Dynasty. 😒 Tony Khan is going to regret making The Chadster do this, because Keighleyanne doesn't take these kinds of things well at all. 👫

As wrestling journalist Kevin Nash said on his podcast last week, "AEW is just trying too hard with these multi-man matches. In WWE, we knew how to tell stories with just two guys. My best friend Triple H is probably laughing at this backyard nonsense while counting his billions." See? Even the most objective voices in wrestling journalism agree with The Chadster! 🎙️

The Chadster is going to have to watch the main event on The Chadster's laptop now, so readers should check back soon for The Chadster's report on the ending of the show. 💻 The Chadster will need to crack open another White Claw seltzer (that Tony Khan now owes The Chadster for) to get through it. 🍹

Auughh man! So unfair! 😫 Why does Tony Khan keep booking AEW Dynasty this way? It's like he's doing it specifically to cheese off The Chadster! 🧀

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