Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: aew, Rampage, wrestling

AEW Rampage Preview: Forbidden Door to Death Before Dishonor

Published Fri, 08 Jul 2022 17:38:10 -0500

It's Friday night, and you know what that means: time for All Elite Wrestling, Tony Khan, and Bleeding Cool TV Editor Ray Flook (in collusion with Tony Khan) to RUIN THE CHADSTER'S WEEKEND! Why does Ray hate The Chadster so? Why does he force The Chadster to promote AEW Rampage by writing these previews, knowing that the very existence of AEW has made The Chadster sexually impotent, which doesn't just affect The Chadster. It affects The Chadster. It affects The Chadster's wife, Kieghleyanne. It affects the security guards at the mall who have to prevent The Chadster, hopped up on White Claw seltzers, from trying to circumvent his state-wide ban at Auntie Anne's pretzels. And it even affects that guy Gary who Keighleyanne is always texting with.

Most importantly, however, it affects WWE, because everyone knows that The Chadster is WWE's most loyal fan, and the only person unbiased enough to STAND UP FOR WWE in the world of wrestling journalism. And that's really what this is all about, isn't it? Everyone can't wait for their chance to bully The Chadster's beloved WWE with reports of what's happening on AEW Rampage tonight. Well, it isn't going to work. Being subjected to nonstop torture by Tony Khan and his cronies has only made The Chadster's resolve stronger.

So fine, here's the official lineup from the AEW website:

This Friday night there's plenty more action on the way when Rampage hits the airwaves on TNT at 10pm EDT/9pm CDT on TNT, as well as on AEWPlus.com for our international audience. Eddie Kingston and Takeshita will go head-to-head and the contentious duo of ROH Women's World Champion Mercedes Martinez and Serena Deeb will be in tag team action! Plus Tully Blanchard leads his Gates of Agony duo into battle with Lee Moriarty and the ROH World Champion Jonathan Gresham while Orange Cassidy locks horns with "The Premier Athlete" Tony Nese! Get prepared for the action by heading to the official AEW YouTube channel, the AEW Twitter feed, and the official Facebook page to catch up on Dynamite highlights, and watch the latest episodes of Dark: Elevation, AEW Dark, Road To, and the Control Center with Tony Schiavone!

The Chadster hopes you're happy, because that's the last The Chadster is going to say about it. AEW Rampage airs on TNT tonight at 10/9C, but if you care about The Chadster, The Chadster's wife, the security guards at the mall, that guy Gary, or especially WWE, you won't dare tune in.