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Dave Bautista Explains Why He Can't Be a Romantic Comedy Leading Man

Dave Bautista has been relatively quiet on the political tweeting front since he's been too busy filming movies lately and he successfully defeated his rival, fellow WWE Hall-of-Famer President Donald Trump. And Bleeding Cool has been relatively quiet on the Dave Bautista clickbait article front since Kaitlyn Booth let us out of the basement to get a COVID vaccination shot and we jumped onto a frieght train and escaped across the country. But Dave Bautista returned in force to Twitter to respond to fan casting suggestions that he didn't appreciate. Bautista took issue with a fan suggesting he be cast as Green Lantern character Killowog, and he took to Twitter to express his displeasure.

Dave Bautista thinks Green Lantern character Killowog is ugly.
Dave Bautista thinks Green Lantern character Killowog is ugly.

"Ok I know I'm not the best looking guy in the world but how come whenever I'm fancast as a character it's always one that's ummmm…. aesthetically challenged?" Bautista asked. "This is probably why I can't get that rom-com lead!"

Bautista's words ring harsh. Yes, by traditional human standards, Killowog may not meet traditional standards of male beauty. But by Bolovaxian standards, he's actually considered to be quite attractive. We're not saying that we personally want to have sex with Killowog. Ha ha! Why would you think we said that? We're just saying that, hey, if we were Bolovaxian, we wouldn't kick him out of bed, is all. So Dave Bautista, take your Earth-centric speciesism someplace else, please.

That said, now we are intrigued with the idea of Dave Bautista starring in a romantic comedy. Maybe he can play himself in the film, and his romantic interest can be a Trump-supporting capital insurrectionist. Can those two crazy kids put their differences aside and find love in the most unexpected of places: Bautista's Twitter feed? Okay, you know what, nevermind. That's a bad idea.

So do you think Dave Bautista would make a good Killowog? Just kidding, we don't care what you think.


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Jude TerrorAbout Jude Terror

A prophecy claims that in the comic book industry's darkest days, a hero would come to lead the people through a plague of overpriced floppies, incentive variant covers, #1 issue reboots, and super-mega-crossover events. Unfortunately, nobody can tell when the comics industry has reached its "darkest days" because it somehow keeps finding new lows to sink to. No matter! Jude Terror stands vigilant, bringing the snarkiest of comic book and pro wrestling clickbait to the undeserving readers of Bleeding Cool.
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