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Strife Builds Inside WWE's Non-Political Antifa-Inspired Retribution

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you about trouble in one of WWE's most powerful institutions. Yes, that's right, after a long and storied career that consisted mainly of losing matches to midcarders, WWE's non-political Antifa-inspired anarchist collective stable, Retribution, looks like it could be headed for a breakup. After the group lost another match to The New Day on WWE Raw last night, leader Mustafa Ali flipped out and berated his stablemates, but it looks like they may have had just about enough of his abuse.

Mustafa Ali, a career jobber, ironically yells at his friends in Retribution who are also career jobbers for losing.
Mustafa Ali, a career jobber, ironically yells at his friends in Retribution who are also career jobbers for losing.

"Are you kidding me? Again? Again?!" Ali shouted after Retribution members Mace and T-Bar lost to Kofi Kingston and Xavier Woods on WWE Raw. "How much longer are we gonna do this?!"

"How many times are you gonna fail me?" Mustafa demanded while pointing at T-Bar before grabbing Mace by the head. "How many times are you gonna disrespect me?!"

"And how many times are you gonna embarrass me?!" Ali yelled while shoving Slapjack and getting in Reckoning's face. "How much longer do I have to deal with this crap?!"

After throwing the microphone on the ground, Ali's tantrum continued. "I've carried all of you on my back!" Ali said. "And you've failed over and over again!

But Ali's teammates in Retribution appear to be tired of getting berated by Ali, who doesn't exactly have the most stellar win/loss record himself. Each took to Twitter to express their feelings after the match.

Ali, for his part, responded only:

Is this the end of Retribution? And if it is, what will happen to its members? Will they return to their old identities? Will any of this ever be mentioned again after the group finally breaks up? Or will Slapjack launch a successful post-Retribution career and become WWE Champion? We'll just have to wait and see, comrades. Until then: socialism or death.


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El PresidenteAbout El Presidente

After a successful fourteen-year career as a South American dictator, El Presidente faked his own death in 2013 in order to pursue his two true passions: rigging American elections for Joe Biden, and wrestling dirt sheet reporting. Since opportunities to rig the election for Joe Biden were few and far between until recently, El Presidente mostly focused on the wrestling dirt sheet reporting, where he became one of the best in the business. Unfortunately, the American CIA sabotaged his 1-900 hotline, the pinnacle of his country's wrestling news technology, and imperialist hacks like Meltzer, Johnson, Sapp, and Satin took all the credit on their stupid websites. Finally, El Presidente has found a way to break into the American market by becoming a Bleeding Cool contributor, so get ready for the spread of great wrestling news and socialism, comrades!
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