Posted in: Comics, Recent Updates | Tagged: Batman, dc, diesel, flash, green lantern, joker, penis, underwear

Diesel DC Boxer Shorts Licence Is Hilarious

Published Thu, 01 Dec 2011 08:00:45 -0600

Last updated Thu, 01 Dec 2011 15:41:31 -0600

So here's what's happening. There has been superhero underwear around for ages. You know, for kids. Then they started making them in larger sizes. For big kids. But they still looked the same. So what do you do if you want to wear superhero underwear but don't want it to look all kiddy? Is there an equivalent of the adult covers for Harry Potter books?

There is now, courtesy of Diesel and DC. But they can't get away with just doing the underwear, however fancy, no, there has to be some cockamamie story behind it all, teaming Batman, The Flash, Green Lantern and… The Joker? Yes, we'll get to that bit. Here are the boxers in question.

Holy Batt-butt. Batsignal on the tramp stamp. And an armour design that reveals itself as you… scratch? Does it come with a dose of bat-crabs?

The hotter you get… are these the boxers you want to keep on during sex so you can see if your speeding buddy will join you? Maybe thinking about him may help you… slow down? Or could it be the opposite?

Glow in the dark boxers. Handy when you're trying to make a 3am exit in the dark, I suppose.

Okay, yes, here we are. Not only can you tell the Joker's religion with this, but seriously, a "super hero"? In the story he's referred to as a "renegade". Well, yes, if being a renegade means having killed tens of thousands of innocent people. And the icongraphy you associate with this character is from an "acid-spewing flower"? So it is quite specifically tied in with the idea of torture, maiming and a slow and lingering death?

Yeah, okay, I want a pair. Certainly if I end up looking like this;