Okay, so last week I was at New York Comic Con so I missed on on Ten Thoughts About Doctor Who – Before The Flood. So, in summary 1) Google It – At Least It Admits This Kind Of Time Travel Story Isn't Original 2) Couldn't The Doctor Have Done The Hologram Trick With Adric? 3) The Time Travel Phone Must Really Rack Up Roaming Fees 4) Doctor Who Monsters Look Better In The Dark And Less Like Obvious Cosplay 5) Amy, Rose And Martha Are Folklore – But Not Donna Or Clara. Ooh. 6) Arcteenians – Now Whithouse References His Torchwood Aliens Too 7) She's Picking Up Bad Vibrations 8) It's A Shame The Ghost Of The Past Dead Crew Only Just Turned Up Now 9) Doctor Who Uses Time Travel On Douglas Adams Rules, Sometimes It Can Be Changed, Sometimes It Was Always Fixed. Deal With It 10) I'm Not Sure Is The Doctor Is Beethoven But He Is Certainly Basil Exposition.
So moving on….
1. The Sonic Sunglasses Sudden Death?
That the existed in the first two parter was enough for some people. That they turned up again in the second meant the end of the word. So to see them snapped in half in the opening minutes by a Viking no less will have registered a cheer from some. But then half of them came in handy later, and as we saw in the Next Week On… they're back. You can't keep a good pair of Sonic sunglasses down.
2. The Horns Apparent
Yes, we have Vikings with horns, you've got a problem with that? We also have warrior aliens, get with the programme. Just because no evidence of horned vikings have ever turned up, doesn't mean that this village of Vikings weren't unsuccessful trendsetters. After all, they were all gobbled up by the aliens weren't they? Maybe that's where the short hair and electric eels in the Netherlands might be waved away as well..
3. Oh Look It's Arya Stark.
Was it a premonition? Or did The Doctor just finish watching the fifth season box set? After all, if Ashildr is now immortal, she can go on to not only be a 14th century highwayman, but also an actress in the twenty-first century, waiting to be plucked – as Popbitch would have it. Oh also, "the girls always thought I was a boy" – well, that certainly prepared her for the role.
She's the hybrid Davros spoke of. She is the Doctor;s greatest mistake. It may lead to his own death and possibly….?
4. Tinky Winky, Dipsy, La La, Po…
Well, it was either the sun from Teletubbies…
But could there be a soupcon of Pirate Planet in there are well?
5. The 2000 Year Diary
The Second Doctor had a five hundred year diary. The Seventh Doctor had a nine hundred year diary. It's now a two thousand year diary. He's been a bit busy since he last had a chance to check it, but it updated nicely. And a confession that reversing the polarity of any kind of neutron flow is improvised nonsense.
6. Look Who's Talking
We know the Doctor talks baby after his encounters with Stormageddon. But who knew that babies has baby sense? Not only detecting cosmic danger but also working out the source of a potential solution?
You know, if Missy was any kind of tactical genius, she's kidnap newborns around the galaxy and string them up in her TARDIS networked to some kind of superintuitive battlecomputer. Unless of course, that's what she already is.
7. Tir Na Noggin The Nog
A glossary for the Americans – and Brits under 40. Noggin The Nog was a series of children's books and barely-animated BBC kids show about vikings by the late, great Oliver Postgate, who also created the Clangers who themselves appeared in an episode of Doctor Who….
8. Public Shaming
So the Doctor's way to defeat the baddies to to take video of them looking foolish, add a laugh track and post it on the galactic YouTube? Damn, he shoud really have tried that with Davros. What would the hashtag be?
9. So Why Did The Sixth Doctor Choose To Look Like That Then?
So we have the new explanation of why the Doctor takes another face, to remind him of who he wants to be. In this case, the Doctor who saved one person against a calamity, back in Fires Of Pompeii. No explanation for why Amy looked like a soothsayer from then of course. But now we want to know why John Frobisher also looks like Lobus Caecilius. Or why the Doctor once really wanted to look like Commander Maxil of the Gallifreyan Guard.
10. The Clara Who Died
There is a thought. That the Doctor has already had his final adventure with Clara. And here is is going back in time to revisit an old face. His fear of losing Clara – shot by a Dalek, becoming a ghost, taken to Valhalla – not so much concern for her, as for her dying at the wrong time, out of order, leading to a tidalwave through time. Check out the Doctor grim reaper hoodie instead of the flash suit. And listen to that Cloister Bell chime every time they travel…
This is his Confession. And he is trying to persuade himself that he can change the fate of Clara…