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4 WWE Raw Matches Set for Tonight for You to Doze Off To

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WWE Monday Night Raw returns with another new episode tonight on the USA Network, and WWE has already revealed four of the matchups we can expect for the red brand's Money in the Bank go-home show. You know you'll be watching because habits are hard to break. Which of those matches is most likely to cause you to doze off while you half pay attention to Raw while mindlessly playing with your phone? We've got the odds below.

The Street Profits challenge The Viking Raiders for Raw, courtesy of WWE.
The Street Profits challenge The Viking Raiders for Raw, courtesy of WWE.

Ricochet and Cedric Alexander will take on Shane Thorne and Brendan Vink in a meaningless Raw tag match featuring four competitors who are never going to escape the mid-card in WWE's scene. Yeah, it's a shame because all are fine performers, but that's just how it works in WWE. Of them all, Richochet probably had the best chance of doing so, maybe about six months ago, but that time has passed. So while this is likely to be a technically competent match (within the confines of WWE's formulaic structure), does it really matter if there are no real stakes? Even so, all of the high flying action and accompanying camera shakes is probably enough to keep viewers awake. If you're going to doze off during this one, it will probably be during one the multiple commercial breaks excruciatingly inserted into the match.

Odds of Putting You to Sleep: 1/4

Raw Tag Team Champions The Street Profits will take on the Viking Raiders in a non-title tag match on Raw tonight. Though it hasn't been announced yet, these teams will presumably face each other at Money in the Bank in a title match. So why, you might wonder, would they face off less than a week earlier? It's WWE silo booking at its finest. Since we already know what the outcome of this match will be, why bother having it all? Maybe the answer will come to you in your dreams after you doze off.

Odds of Putting You to Sleep: 1/2

WWE will hold a gauntlet match on Raw for Apollo Crews' Money in the Bank ladder match spot, since Crews was "injured" last week and taken out of the match. Which midcarder will earn a chance to compete in the match that was already filmed last week? Does it really matter when Baron Corbin is definitely walking away with the Money in the Bank contract on Sunday?

Odds of Putting You to Sleep: 1/3

WWE Champion Drew McIntyre is putting his title on the line against Seth Rollins at Money in the Bank, but on Raw tonight, McIntyre puts nothing on the line against Rollins' lackey, Buddy Murphy. This match ends one of two ways: Seth Rollins interferes during the match and he and Murphy beat down McIntyre to end the show, or Seth Rollins interferes after the match and he and Murphy beat down McIntyre to end the show. But you'll definitely be asleep by then either way.

Odds of Putting You to Sleep: 1/1

Raw begins at 8PM Eastern on USA tonight. Try to take a nap beforehand so you can make it through as much of the show as possible.

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Jude TerrorAbout Jude Terror

A prophecy once said that in the comic book industry's darkest days, a hero would come to lead the people through a plague of overpriced floppies, incentive variant covers, #1 issue reboots, and super-mega-crossover events. Sadly, that prophecy was wrong. Oh, Jude Terror was right. For ten years. About everything. But nobody listened. And so, Jude Terror has moved on to a more important mission: turning Bleeding Cool into a pro wrestling dirt sheet!
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