Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: aew, AEW Dynamite, fyter fest, recaps, wrestling

7 Things The Chadster Hated About AEW Dynamite: Fyter Fest Week 1

AEW Dynamite kicked off the first night of Fyter Fest last night, and The Chadster has only just woken up from a White Claw seltzer coma after watching it. The Chadster downed three and a half seltzers during the show, and it still wasn't enough to numb The Chadster to the pain caused by Tony Khan and his personal vendetta against The Chadster. Making things worse, Bleeding Cool TV Editor Ray Flook, who is in cahoots with Tony Khan, is trying to RUIN THE CHADSTER'S LIFE by forcing The Chadster to write about the show. Ray knows that The Chadster is sexually impotent because of AEW Dynamite because The Chadster is constantly bringing it up during the BC TV team meetings, but Ray must enjoy seeing The Chadster suffer. Why, Ray, why?!

Nevertheless, The Chadster is a professional journalist and will deliver the unbiased, neutral reporting demanded of his profession. With that in mind, here are seven things The Chadster hated about AEW Dynamite: Fyter Fest.

Wardlow defeated Orange Cassidy to retain the TNT Championship. The one thing about this match that really cheesed The Chadster off was how much fun everyone was having. Wardlow, Orange Cassidy, The Best Friends, the referee, and especially the fans. It's that last one that The Chadster found to be extremely disrespectful to WWE, which has invested so much effort into making sure the fans never have too much fun because, you know what, it can never lead to anything good. Once the fans start to have too much fun, they expect to have fun all the time, but wrestling isn't about fun. It's about Vince McMahon's agenda, and he's earned it, with everything he's done for the business. So yes, The Chadster hated this match.

Chris Jericho cut a promo on Eddie Kingston to sell their Barbed Wire Everywhere match happening next week, and needless to say The Chadster was none-too-pleased. AEW was only just getting started disrespecting WWE by competing with them this week, and they're already looking ahead to next week and how they can compete with WWE more? And to do it on a week where WWE was about to announce a change to TV-14 ratings for Raw? Jealous much, Tony Khan? The Chadster always knows.

Jon Moxley successfully defended the Interim AEW Championship against Konosuke Takeshita, and The Chadster is absolutely livid about it. It's bad enough that AEW bullies WWE on a weekly basis, but to team up with wrestlers from other countries to do it? That's got to be some kind of violation of the Geneva Convention, and The Chadster hopes WWE prosecutes AEW for war crimes.

Luchasaurus squashed Griff Garrison and then beat up Brian Pillman Jr. for good measure, and he did it after Christian Cage cut another promo going after a dead dad, this time Pillman's. The Chadster doesn't like anything Christian Cage does because Cage is a traitor who literally stabbed Vince McMahon in the back by coming to AEW despite everything WWE has done for him. The Chadster would say he ought to be cutting these promos in WWE, but WWE didn't want to use him for anything, so instead, The Chadster will say that Christian Cage should have sat home and collected a legends paycheck from WWE because it's ridiculous that he thinks he knows better than Vince McMahon whether he can still wrestle or not.

Claudio Castagnoli beat Jake Hager in a match that made The Chadster literally sick. Here are two guys who stabbed Vince McMahon in the back and came to AEW, and now they're feuding based on their previous connection as the Real Americans in WWE? WWE should sue them, and The Chadster is sure they would if their lawyers weren't so busy defending against all those shareholder lawsuits for Vince McMahon's NDA payments. But one day…

Serena Deeb beat Anna Jay, and after, Tay Conti told Anna Jay to think about her career decisions. The Chadster was almost pleased to hear that Conti agrees with The Chadster that Anna Jay, and all wrestlers, should quit AEW and beg WWE for a job, but then The Chadster realized she was just talking about how Anna Jay should leave the Dark Order and join the Jericho Appreciation Society, and The Chadster was so upset at being temporarily fooled he threw his White Claw seltzer at the television, and the seltzer was only halfway finished. You owe The Chadster half a White Claw seltzer, Tony Khan!

Finally, Keith Lee and Swerve Strickland won a triple threat match against The Young Bucks and Team Taz. A title changing hands on an episode of AEW Dynamite?! Are you kidding The Chadster?! IT's bad enough that AEW treats the tag team championships like they matter in the first place, which just goes to show that they don't understand the first thing about the wrestling business. But having a title change on free TV is just so disrespectful and sets up unrealistic expectations from wrestling fans who are only going to get mad when the next seventy-three title matches on Raw end in disqualification. And that's not even taking into account that Lee and Strickland are both traitors to WWE who literally stabbed Vince McMahon right in the back! Auughh man! So unfair!

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