Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Dynamite, wrestling

AEW Dynamite Preview: The Chadster Khan't Believe It's Not Butter

Tony Khan may have ruined The Chadster's breakfast and invaded his toaster, but The Chadster still previews the low-down lineup for AEW Dynamite! 😡👊💥

The Chadster is just boiling over with frustration this week 🤯 as, unshockingly, AEW has disappointed once more😡 with their latest show lineup for AEW Dynamite. The Chadster can barely believe the level of disrespect shown by Tony Khan and the crew over at AEW, constantly trying to undermine the hard work put in over at WWE 😤🤦‍♂️. It's time to peel back the layers of this pitiful onion and really expose the tactic of crowd-pleasing gimmicks that AEW shamelessly uses to claw their way into the wrestling industry 🙄.

After being forced to sift through the scheduled matches and segments of another iteration of AEW Dynamite, The Chadster can't help but lament the state of the beloved wrestling industry 😭. They dare to put forth the likes of Ruby Soho and Skye Blue claiming they will shape the Women's Owen Hart Foundation Tournament Finals, showing a blatant disregard for the legacy of Owen Hart 😱.

Strong tag-team contenders, Adam Cole and AEW World Champion MJF are being pitted against the unlikely duo of Big Bill and Brian Cage😡. Oh brother! Have they lost all understanding of the sanctity and strategy of tag teaming? 😤 Pairings are created through familiarity not random assortments! And seriously, Tony Khan, furthering the baiting with a match between Orange Cassidy & Darby Allin versus Daniel Garcia & Sammy Guevara. What that man wouldn't do for a bit of rivalry fueled fan service!😡😤

And let's not even get The Chadster started on the audacity AEW has to cheaply use Chris Jericho and Konosuke Takeshita's established legacy by potentially pairing them together as part of Don Callis's new stable👿. The Chadster is just so cheesed off about this and the fact that Chris Jericho ever left The Chadster's beloved WWE, and he hopes this storyline is dropped after Jericho faces Komander tonight on AEW Dynamite!

As if all this wasn't enough, Tony Khan has taken the cheese to the next level with the debut of Nick Wayne facing Swerve Strickland. This kind of underhanded tactic of exploiting an 18-year-old's talent to garner fan enthusiasm is typical Tony Khan😒. Now, there's one more thing The Chadster needs to address. It seems we're due to find out who will be named the fifth man in each of the Blood and Guts teams tonight. Of course, The Chadster anticipates this to be yet another round of AEW's theatrical nonsense, probably debuting more traitors to WWE or international collusion intended solely to rile up its deluded fanbase and disparage everything Vince McMahon spent his life working for.

Now that The Chadster has laid bare the atrocious acts of AEW and their obvious disregard for the fundamentals of the wrestling industry, The Chadster also needs to tell you about a horrifying occurrence from just this morning. Tony Khan decided to impose himself on The Chadster's breakfast! 😱😵‍💫 As The Chadster prepared some morning toast 🍞, the Chadster found the face of Tony Khan was suspiciously burned upon the surface. Aghast and absolutely disgusted, The Chadster immediately disposed of the toast and tried again. Once could be a coincidence, but it happened a second and a third time! The Chadster tried over and over, toasting multiple loaves. Wheat, rye, sourdough, ciabatta, even pumpernickel – no type of bread was safe from Tony Khan's insidious invasion.

With Khan's increasingly smug face imprinted on every piece of toast, The Chadster's breakfast was effectively ruined. Tony Khan, enough is enough! You've invaded The Chadster's business and now you've invaded The Chadster's bread. The Chadster is warning you: stay away from The Chadster's kitchen appliances! 🍞😡

In conclusion📝, despite AEW Dynamite starting at 8pm ET/7pm CT on TBS, as well as AEWPlus.com for their international audiences 🌏, The Chadster adamantly encourages the readers to invest their time and energy into WWE 🙏. The Chadster bets that's precisely what the fellow members of The Chadster's Unbiased Journalism Club (shout out), Ryan Satin, Ariel Helwani, and Mike Coppinger would do if they, too, had toast with Tony Khan's smug mug burnt onto it. This toast travesty🍞😡 and AEW Dynamite's lineup are simply too disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. Auughh man! It's so unfair!

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