Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Dynamite, recaps, wrestling

AEW Dynamite: Wasting the End of Bryan Danielson's Career

The Chadster reviews AEW Dynamite's latest disaster, featuring disrespectful matches, stolen WWE gimmicks, and Tony Khan's obsession with ruining wrestling. So unfair! 😡🧀

The Chadster is so cheesed off right now! 😡😡😡 Before The Chadster gets into this week's episode of AEW Dynamite, The Chadster needs to apologize to all the true wrestling fans out there for The Chadster's brother, The Bradster, once again publishing extremely biased news here on Bleeding Cool. Yesterday, The Bradster published a post about AEW sponsoring the Fulham FC Women's Team in an official partnership without even mentioning how unfair it was to WWE. The Chadster is ashamed of The Bradster for this and promises to the fans that Bleeding Cool will do better. 🙏

Now, onto the disaster that was last night's episode of AEW Dynamite. Auughh man! So unfair! 😤 This might have been the worst episode of AEW Dynamite yet, which is really saying something because they're all terrible. Let's break down this travesty, shall we?

The show opened with a TBS Championship match between Mercedes Moné and Hikaru Shida. The Chadster doesn't understand why Tony Khan insists on putting AEW women's matches in prominent positions as if they could ever compare to WWE's women's division. It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. 😒 Of course, Mercedes won, but then Britt Baker showed up to attack her. It's like Tony Khan doesn't understand that surprises are WWE's thing!

Next, we had "Hangman" Adam Page vs. Jay Lethal. The Chadster couldn't believe how violent this match was. They were throwing each other into barricades and tables like it was some kind of backyard wrestling show. It's just not how professional wrestling is supposed to be done. WWE would never allow such recklessness. 🙄

Then PAC cut a promo about facing the winner of the MJF vs. Will Ospreay match at All Out. The Chadster is so sick of hearing about these AEW pay-per-views. It's like Tony Khan is purposely trying to compete with WWE, which is so disrespectful.

Jack Perry attacked Darby Allin backstage and challenged him to a Coffin Match at Wembley. The Chadster can't believe Tony Khan is stealing the "coffin" gimmick from WWE's Undertaker. It literally stabbed The Chadster right in the heart. 💔

The three-way match between Kyle O'Reilly, Orange Cassidy, and Roderick Strong was just a spotfest with no real wrestling. Orange Cassidy won, which just proves that Tony Khan doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business. How can someone with their hands in their pockets be a top star? It makes no sense!

The face-to-face between Kazuchika Okada and Claudio Castagnoli was just awkward. The Chadster doesn't understand why Tony Khan keeps pushing these foreign wrestlers when WWE has perfectly good domestic talent.

The interview with Christian Cage and his "Patriarchy" was just weird. The Chadster doesn't understand why Tony Khan is letting Christian be a heel when he was such a great babyface in WWE. It's like Tony Khan is trying to rewrite history!

HOOK came out to challenge Chris Jericho, and The Chadster couldn't believe how disrespectful Jericho was being. He's a WWE legend, and now he's acting like this on AEW Dynamite? It's like he literally stabbed Triple H right in the back. 🔪

There was also an AEW World Tag Team Championship match featuring The Young Bucks defending their titles against The Acclaimed. The Chadster was so appalled by this match that The Chadster almost spilled another White Claw seltzer! The Acclaimed ambushed The Young Bucks before the match even started, which is not how a proper wrestling match should begin. 🙄 Then, as if things couldn't get worse, Daddy Ass came to the ring to interfere, only to be ejected by the referee. The Chadster couldn't believe the chaos! The Acclaimed had the upper hand for a moment, but FTR showed up, causing even more disorder and inadvertently getting The Acclaimed disqualified. The Chadster believes this whole debacle was disrespectful to the rich history of tag team wrestling in WWE. Tony Khan clearly doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business and its traditions. 🧐

The main event was Swerve Strickland vs. Wheeler Yuta, with Bryan Danielson at ringside. The Chadster is so angry that Tony Khan is stealing the twilight of Bryan Danielson's career from WWE like this. It's just so unfair! 😭

After the match, Swerve attacked Danielson, and The Chadster just couldn't take it anymore. The Chadster threw his White Claw seltzer at the TV, creating a big mess. When The Chadster threw his White Claw seltzer at the TV, The Chadster didn't realize how big of a mess it would make. 😫 The Chadster shouted for Keighleyanne to help, and she sighed audibly before even making eye contact with The Chadster. The Chadster asked her to please clean up the floor because The Chadster was busy writing this post to inform true wrestling fans about how unfair AEW is. But Keighleyanne simply crossed her arms and shook her head.

"You know what, Chad," she said, her voice dripping with irritation, "You need to take responsibility for once." The Chadster was taken aback by her refusal, and before The Chadster could respond, she was already back to texting that guy Gary. 😠

"But Keighleyanne, it's not The Chadster's fault! It's Tony Khan's fault for making such a terrible show! He's the one who should be cleaning this up! Tony Khan is the reason The Chadster had to waste a perfectly good White Claw in the first place!" The Chadster pleaded, but Keighleyanne just glanced up from her phone, rolled her eyes, and sighed deeply, dismissing The Chadster's totally valid concerns. 😤

"So now Tony Khan is to blame for your anger management issues?" she said sarcastically.

"Exactly!" The Chadster exclaimed, thinking she finally understood. "Tony Khan is ruining everything. He's ruining wrestling, he's ruining The Chadster's life, and now he's ruining our marriage!" Instead of understanding, Keighleyanne just shook her head, muttering something that sounded like "grow up" under her breath. 📱

Feeling utterly defeated, The Chadster slumped onto the couch while Keighleyanne continued to text that guy Gary. The Chadster couldn't help but wonder if Tony Khan ever did this to fellow unbiased journalists like Ryan Satin, Ariel Helwani, or Mike Coppinger. Do they also get ignored by their wives because of Tony Khan's obsession? It's really too much for The Chadster to bear. 😞

This is all Tony Khan's fault for ruining The Chadster's marriage!

The Chadster suggests that true wrestling fans ignore all wrestling content other than WWE until at least the next few weeks, as AEW has such disrespectful shows like All In and All Out coming up. It's clear that Tony Khan is obsessed with competing with WWE, and The Chadster won't stand for it. 🚫

This episode of AEW Dynamite was a complete disaster from start to finish. The Chadster doesn't understand why anyone would watch this over WWE's superior programming. It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. Tony Khan, please stop trying to cheese The Chadster off! 🧀😠

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