Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: aew rampage, recaps, wrestling

AEW Rampage Review: Live Show Ruins The Chadster's Night

Dive into The Chadster's take on the latest AEW Rampage – where live antics fall short and WWE reigns supreme despite Tony Khan's best efforts! 🙄🤼‍♂️

Hey there, all you wrestling fans out there! The Chadster is back with another report that's gonna absolutely cheese you off just like it did to The Chadster. Last night, AEW Rampage was live, and oh man, it was as awful as ever – and not just any awfulness, folks, but the kind that strikes when they broadcast live, making the show a desperate grab for attention, luring viewers away from the glory that is WWE Smackdown 🤬!

The evening's travesty began with AEW World Tag Team Champion "Absolute" Ricky Starks facing off against LFI's Preston Vance. Big Bill was at ringside yapping away, but despite that, Starks pinned Vance after a spear. Lo and behold, Rush and Dralistico popped in, helping Vance when honestly, no one asked for their interference 🙄.

Then, oh boy, here comes Chris Jericho blabbering about revenge in Tokyo against Takeshita this Sunday in a DDT match. Like, seriously, not even in the AEW ring? The Chadster knows what this is, of course: international collusion to bully WWE, which is just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it 😒!

Next, Jay Lethal chattered on about how he's superior to ROH World Champion Eddie Kingston, with Karen Jarrett joining in 🙄. The Chadster isn't one to jump on the anti-Karen bandwagon, but Jarrett needs to chill. Ortiz confronted them for some reason, got manhandled, and The Chadster just can't figure out why anyone is supposed to care. All of this pales in comparison to WWE's superior storytelling.

Auughh man! So unfair! 🤯 The Chadster couldn't believe his eyes when Ruby Soho faced Red Velvet, and mid-match, Soho receives some mysterious flowers, getting totally sidetracked and losing the match. It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it to pull such a ridiculous stunt! Seriously, who orchestrates floral deliveries in the middle of a fight? Clearly a tactic only AEW would stoop to. 😒

And then, The Chadster has to talk about The Kingdom, featuring Matt Taven and Mike Bennett, who just utterly demolished a pair of local jobbers. The match was so one-sided, it made The Chadster yawn. 😴 It's apparent AEW has zero clues about proper competition or respect for the wrestling industry, unlike the esteemed WWE that sets the gold standard for compelling challenges and storytelling. Literally, it was like watching a Goliath stomp on a pair of Davids – and not even in a compelling, biblical showdown kind of way!

Backstage, Daniel Garcia then whined about facing Andrade El Idolo, but the real eye-roll was Ruby Soho and Saraya arguing about the flowers Soho received earlier. Drama, drama, drama – it's like a bad sitcom that never ends with these two 📺!

Oh, The Chadster just cannot with the main event, seeing AAA Cruiserweight Champion Komander & AAA Mega Champion El Hijo del Vikingo squaring off against FTR. They were flipping and flying all over the place, but guess what? FTR wins using the Big Rig 🙄. Then there's the handshake and smiles after the match. Auughh man! So unfair! Where's the spite, the pure wrestling animosity that WWE masters? It's like AEW is playing patty-cake in the ring instead of giving us the raw conflict we deserve from the sport! 😤

Auughh man! So unfair! AEW had to make Rampage live this week, showing off by pulling out all the stops to envy WWE's perfectly timed Smackdown 😡. This blatant attempt by Tony Khan to upset the wrestling balance is like changing the rules of the game midway through just because you can!

Last night, The Chadster was tortured by yet another frightening nightmare. In the depths of The Chadster's subconscious, Tony Khan had joined forces with the remaining members of Smash Mouth, embarking on a sinister tour unlike any before. Each song was a twisted rendition tailored for AEW, casting a shadow over the melodies The Chadster holds dear. The Chadster's ears bled hearing the iconic "All Star" horrifically transformed: 🎶 "Hey now, you're an All Star, put your shades on, go play—smackdown with Orange Cassidy in the fray!" Each note, a dagger to The Chadster's soul, as The Chadster helplessly watched the crowd cheer for AEW's laziest wrestler. The Chadster can't even begin to express the sheer horror of witnessing Smash Mouth's legacy being mutilated to glorify that slothful wrestling promotion. Tony Khan, The Chadster implores you, have some decency and stay the heck out of The Chadster's dreams! The Chadster needs The Chadster's beauty sleep, NOT more reasons to be cheesed off! 🛌😠🎤

In conclusion, AEW Rampage was as bad as it gets. Tony Khan's personal vendetta to ruin The Chadster's life was evident with last night's show 📺. It's no surprise Keighleyanne hardly paid attention to The Chadster's commentary the show, as she was too busy texting that guy Gary 😡. Once again, AEW fails to respect the sanctity of professional wrestling and The Chadster's marriage! Stay tuned, as The Chadster continues to wage a war on poor taste and bias in wrestling reporting – unlike those other "unbiased" reporters all firmly ensconced in Tony Khan's pocket! ✊📰

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