Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: aew rampage, recaps, wrestling

AEW Rampage Review: Squandering Tony Khan's Money in the Bank

Tony Khan's latest offense against the wrestling business? AEW Rampage! And on Money in the Bank weekend, no less! The Chadster breaks it all down!

Hey, hey, hey, Chad-a-maniacs! Looks like it's that time again. The Chadster's here to tell you all about last night's gut-wrenching episode of AEW Rampage. And let The Chadster tell you, this one was a doozy! If The Chadster thought AEW was wrestling heresy before, well this, this was just the ultimate show of disrespect to the great wrestling legacy. But before we get into tearing this show to bits in The Chadster's trademarked objective fashion, The Chadster has to warn you, this episode of AEW Rampage last night was even more offensive to traditional wrestling norms than usual. 😥

Right out of the gate, AEW Rampage last night decided to set the tone for a disrespectful night with an ROH World Championship match between Claudio Castagnoli and Komander? 😲 Auughh man! So unfair! 👎 It's like AEW is purposely trying to get The Chadster's blood boiling. As if that wasn't enough, they employed the cheap tactic of giving Komander a four-match winning streak to make it seem like he could actually pose a threat to the legacy of the ROH World Championship.

Moving on, Shawn Spears took on The Blade (with The Butcher)! Spears pulled off a win with a C4 in the middle of the ring. Just once, The Chadster would love to see a good old-fashioned pinning combination instead of these flashy finishing moves!

Then we got treated to QTV—Johnny TV & QT Marshall versus Hardy Party—Matt Hardy & Brother Zay (with Ethan Page). Guess what folks, QTV managed a win with a split-legged moonsault on Brother Zay! Again with the high-flying? The WWE knows how to keep things grounded.

The night ended with Hikaru Shida facing off against Taya Valkyrie. Shida took it home with a roll up. These matches were a disappointing reflection of AEW's complete lack of understanding of what wrestling is supposed to be!

And what was with all the high-flying manoeuvers that Chadster saw last night? It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. The fans were chanting "This is awesome!" The Chadster has to wonder, "Awesome" for who? For WWE fans who cherish solid, clever booking and a consistent wrestling style? The Chadster doesn't think so! 🤨

Get this, in the middle of enduring this torturous episode of AEW Rampage, every time a commercial break came on and the screen went black for a second, The Chadster could see his reflection in the television. Alone in his recliner, clutching a can of White Claw Seltzer and his iPad, The Chadster could hardly believe his eyes. Over the back of the Chadster's chair, like some garish spectre, there was Tony Khan! 😨

But every time The Chadster turned around, no Tony Khan! During a particularly thrilling AEW Rampage commercial break, in which The Chadster was just so relieved to get a break from AEW's disrespectful action, there he was again in the reflection, making kissy faces at The Chadster. The Chadster spun around, but once again, Tony Khan was nowhere to be found. This continued throughout the entire night, each reflection more terrifying than the last. The Chadster's nerves were rattled, needless to say, it made watching AEW Rampage even more of a chore than usual.

In conclusion, let The Chadster just say, the sheer audacity of Kahn and AEW's disrespectful booking is enough to leave any true wrestling acolyte cheesed off. This episode of AEW Rampage was just another attempt by Tony Khan to undermine the grandeur of WWE. But don't fret, faithful readers. Stick around for The Chadster's completely unbiased coverage of WWE Money in the Bank later today. The Chadster promises it'll be the best wrestling show you'll witness this weekend. 🙌 And remember, regardless of the high-flying antics of AEW Rampage, The Chadster is always here to remind you of wrestling's true roots – the WWE. Take care now! 💯👋

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