Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: aew, Rampage, recaps, wrestling

Goth Phase: The Acclaimed Eviscerate Sting and Darby Allin on Rampage

As promised, The Acclaimed debuted their new diss track, Goth Phase, on AEW Rampage last night, delivering a musical blow to their rivals, Sting and Darby Allin. Two grown men and they're going through a goth phase," rapped Platinum Max Caster. "Sting and Darby, they be stayin' where the cops stay. The Acclaimed, stayin' where the ops stay, illest in the game, by the way, we do not play." It was the greatest musical triumph since the hit song "Hey Hey" by The Chadster's favorite musical group, The Miz and John Morrison, and The Chadster has never been so cheesed off.

Everybody knows that Rock and Wrestling is WWE's thing. It has been since the 1980s. So where does AEW get off copying WWE like that? Auughh man! So unfair! Cyndi Lauper is rolling over in her grave!

If the music video was the only thing that happened on AEW Rampage, it would have been more than enough to ruin The Chadster's weekend. But Tony Khan wasn't happy with that and insisted on taking things further by featuring four wrestling matches. On a one-hour show?! Come on!

Adam Cole vs. Trent opened the show with a decent match that broke down into interference from each man's respective stable, allowing Cole to get the pin after a low blow.

Shawn Spears also wrestled on AEW Rampage this week, though it was in a brief squash match that led into a promo on CM Punk. Spears also laid into Wardlow during his promo, calling him a one-move wonder, further teasing Wardlow's eventual face turn, which the AEW crowd will go absolutely wild for, and which will likely ensure The Chadster is sexually impotent for years to come!

In a trios match, Kris Statlander, Red Velvet, and Leyla Hirsch competed against Nyla Rose, The Bunny, and Penelope Ford. The babyfaces were unable to work together and an argument between Hirsch and Statlander led to the heels getting the win.

Rampage this week also featured a video package for Thunder Rosa vs. Mercedes Martinez, and in a segment at the commentary table, Jay Lethal challenged Ricky Starks to a match for the FTW Championship.

And in the AEW Rampage main event, Jungle Boy and Luchasaurus successfully defended the AEW Tag Team Championships against The Dark Order, to the delight of the crowd, which The Chadster found just so disrespectful because it goes against everything WWE has tried to do for the wrestling business by making a Tag Team Championship match the main event.

By sending the message that tag team belts matter, Tony Khan just proves that he doesn't understand anything about the wrestling business and has absolutely zero respect for Vince McMahon and everything he's done for it. But none of that is a surprise to The Chadster, who has been saying this all along. AEW Rampage was a fun way for AEW fans to spend a Friday night, but for The Chadster, it was literal torture, and The Chadster will never forgive Bleeding Cool TV Editor Ray Flook for forcing The Chadster to watch and report on it. So disrespectful! And that's the bottom line 'cause Chad said so!

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