Posted in: Netflix, Opinion, TV, TV | Tagged: cbs news, opinion, stranger things 5

Stranger Things 5 & CBS News: 2 Bad Tastes That Taste Worse Together

Based on a hunch, a "source," and a Google Doc, Stranger Things 5 conspiracy theorists got a shoutout from CBS News. Seriously.

Some of you might be old enough to remember those commercials for Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, where one person is eating chocolate and minding their own business, but they end up running into someone eating peanut butter who was minding their own business. One person would say, "You got your peanut butter on my chocolate!" and the other would respond, "You got your chocolate in my peanut butter!" And then they would try it and find out that they're actually "two great tastes that taste great together," and everyone starts laughing, having a good time. Well, think of a current segment of the Stranger Things 5 "fanbase" and the Bari Weiss-run CBS News as the "chocolate" and "peanut butter" in this scenario – except it "tastes" like crap, leave a lot of folks feeling annoyed, and makes it so that no one is having a good time.

In case you hadn't heard, there are folks out there who believe that the second volume of Stranger Things 5 was meant to be approximately two hours longer than what was eventually released. More than that, the implication behind the petition drive is that those scenes were removed by either Netflix or series creators Matt & Ross Duffer – or both – for some questionable (and possibly nefarious) reasons. Except their case is based on a "reliable source" without actual evidence, a list of supposed deleted scenes that hasn't been verified, and the need for everyone to have the same opinion about Volume 2.

But let's set aside the fact that fans need to stop feeling entitled and privileged when it comes to getting the ending of a story that they believe they've somehow earned. Or that they need to stop running to "tinfoil hat land" when they don't get what they want. Or that they need to remember that films and television series have had deleted scenes for years. Or that films and television shows will routinely show scenes that don't end up in what eventually hits our screens. Apparently, a Google Doc, some hurt feelings, and a conspiracy theory involving a streaming service looking to sabotage one of the biggest series of all time was enough to get the attention of CBS News.

To be fair, it didn't become a segment on 60 Minutes (Weiss is having enough troubles there), but it did get highlighted by the CBS News 24/7 live news stream and a write-up by CBS 19 News in Charlottesville, Virginia. Again, just so we're clear? A bunch of pissed off fans with a "reliable source," a Google Doc, and a high level of butthurt were able to work that into mainstream news coverage. And yet, claims of "executive meddling" and that "everyone is clearly dissatisfied" go unchecked. But in the end, there's one line in the online petition that cuts to the heart of a bigger and uglier problem: "I believe the fans should have a say in how the series should go." No, you shouldn't. Because we've seen the ideas that you've posted in the past about how you want to see the series end, and guess what? They suck. And no conspiracy theory out there can make up for that.

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