Posted in: Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: wrestling, WWE Raw

WWE Raw Preview: AJ Lee Returns in Greatest Episode Ever Tonight

The Chadster previews tonight's WWE Raw featuring AJ Lee's return! This will be the greatest wrestling show ever! Tony Khan could never! 😤🎯

The Chadster is literally shaking with excitement right now (not withdrawal, no matter what Keighleyanne says)! 😱 Tonight's episode of WWE Raw is going to be the most incredible three hours of television in the history of the medium, and Tony Khan could never, EVER hope to produce anything that even comes close to what WWE Raw will deliver tonight! 🎯 The Chadster knows for a fact that this episode of WWE Raw will make every AEW show look like a backyard wrestling event filmed on someone's flip phone! Auughh man! So unfair that Tony Khan even tries to compete! 😤

Let The Chadster start with the most monumental return in professional wrestling history: AJ Lee is coming back to WWE Raw for the first time in over a decade! 🙌 The three-time Divas Champion's appearance on SmackDown last Friday alongside her husband CM Punk was already the greatest moment in wrestling history, but tonight on WWE Raw, she's going to top even that! The Chadster was watching that SmackDown episode with Keighleyanne, and when AJ appeared, The Chadster wanted to celebrate with a refreshing Seagram's Escapes Spiked (the official adult beverage of champions), but Keighleyanne refused to let The Chadster have even one! 😠 She's still mad about the whole "boofing" incident during Forbidden Door, which is totally Tony Khan's fault for making The Chadster so stressed! Keighleyanne clearly doesn't respect the Women's Evolution that Stephanie McMahon started, and The Chadster urges all loyal WWE fans to join in pressuring Keighleyanne to stop oppressing The Chadster by using the hashtags #CancelKeighleyanne and #LetTheChadsterDrink! 📱 The Chadster is starting to suspect that Keighleyanne, that guy Gary she's always texting, and Tony Khan are all in cahoots to make The Chadster's life miserable! 🤔

Moving on to what will surely be the greatest tag team promo segment in the history of WWE Raw: The Usos are reunited and responding to last week's events! 🎤 Jimmy Uso saving his brother Jey from Bron Breakker and Bronson Reed was storytelling perfection that makes every AEW tag team angle look like it was written by kindergarteners! The Vision versus The Usos is the kind of long-term booking that Tony Khan doesn't understand a single thing about! This segment on WWE Raw will redefine what microphone work means in professional wrestling! 💪

The women's division match between Lyra Valkyria and Raquel Rodriguez on tonight's WWE Raw is going to be the single greatest women's wrestling match ever performed! 🌟 The subtle storytelling with Bayley's absence adds layers of complexity that AEW's women's division could never achieve even if Tony Khan had a million years to try! Rodriguez representing The Judgment Day brings faction warfare to WWE Raw that makes AEW's chaotic multi-person brawls look like unorganized nonsense! It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it when AEW tries to do women's wrestling! 😡

Finally, AJ Styles seeking revenge on El Grande Americano after last week's Intercontinental Championship match interference is going to be the most phenomenal segment in WWE Raw history! 🎭 The controlled, methodical storytelling of WWE Raw makes AEW's TV style where they respect the intelligence of the audience and expect them to understand stories without having it spoonfed to them by announcers shouting about it look like amateur hour at the local community center! This is REAL wrestling storytelling that respects the business and understand that viewers have the attention spans of goldfish and only understand "moments!" Wait, what was The Chadster talking about? The Chadster lost his train of thought.

Anyway, anyone who doesn't tune into WWE Raw tonight at 8E/5P on Netflix is literally shirking their duty as a wrestling fan! 📺 And if you think AEW is more fun to watch than WWE Raw, then you clearly don't understand a single thing about the wrestling business! WWE Raw is the pinnacle of sports entertainment, and tonight's episode will prove once and for all that WWE is the only wrestling company that matters! 🏆

Don't miss WWE Raw tonight – it's going to be literally perfect! 💯

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