Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: aew rampage, wrestling

AEW Rampage: Holiday Bash Preview: Tony Khan's War on Christmas

The Chadster warns fans about AEW Rampage: Holiday Bash and reveals a terrifying Tony Khan nightmare. Don't let AEW ruin your festive spirit! 🎄😱🚫

The Chadster is so cheesed off right now! 😡😡😡 Tonight, Tony Khan is once again trying to ruin The Chadster's weekend with another episode of AEW Rampage: Holiday Bash. Auughh man! So unfair! 😤 The Chadster doesn't understand why Tony Khan insists on programming AEW Rampage: Holiday Bash against WWE's replay of SmackDown. It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it. That's not what the holiday spirit is supposed to be about, Tony Khan. 🙄

Let's take a look at what Tony Khan has in store for AEW Rampage: Holiday Bash tonight, shall we? 🤔 First up, we've got a Continental Classic Gold League match between Brody King and Komander. The Chadster doesn't understand why AEW insists on having these ridiculous tournament matches. 🤷‍♂️ In WWE, we know who the real stars are, and they don't need silly tournaments to prove it. Tony Khan clearly doesn't understand a single thing about the wrestling business. 😒

Speaking of wrestlers who don't understand the business, Willow Nightingale is taking on Harley Cameron in a singles match. The Chadster remembers when Willow was just starting out, how she skipped the line by not paying her dues in WWE NXT before becoming one of AEW's rising stars. 🔪 It's enough to make The Chadster want to throw his eggnog-flavored White Claw seltzer at the TV! 🍹💥

But wait, there's more! 🙄 AEW Rampage: Holiday Bash is also featuring a tag team match with The Don Callis Family (AEW International Champion Konosuke Takeshita & ROH World TV Champion Brian Cage) taking on Mark Davis & Powerhouse Hobbs. The Chadster can't help but wonder why Tony Khan insists on having so many titles floating around. It's like he's trying to cheese off The Chadster personally! 😠

And as if that wasn't enough, Action Andretti & Lio Rush will be in tag team action. The Chadster doesn't even want to think about how this match will probably be full of high-flying moves and crowd-pleasing moments. It's just not how wrestling is supposed to be! 😤

The Chadster is begging you, please don't tune into AEW Rampage: Holiday Bash tonight at 10/9C on TNT. Every viewer only encourages Tony Khan to keep tormenting The Chadster. 😢

Speaking of torment, The Chadster had another terrible nightmare about Tony Khan last night, and it was all because of this AEW Rampage: Holiday Bash preview. 😰 In the dream, The Chadster was trying to enjoy a nice, relaxing evening in his Mazda Miata, listening to Smash Mouth's "All Star" on repeat. Suddenly, Tony Khan appeared in the rearview mirror, wearing a Santa hat and holding a cup of eggnog! 🎅

Tony Khan started chasing The Chadster's Miata through a winter wonderland, throwing candy canes and ornaments at the car. The Chadster tried to escape, but every turn led to another AEW billboard advertising AEW Rampage: Holiday Bash. 😱 As The Chadster's car spun out of control on a patch of ice, Tony Khan caught up and poured his eggnog all over The Chadster's head, laughing maniacally. The Chadster woke up in a cold sweat, clutching his White Claw seltzer for dear life. 😓

Tony Khan, The Chadster is warning you to stop invading his peaceful slumber! It's bad enough that you're ruining wrestling with shows like AEW Rampage: Holiday Bash, but now you're ruining The Chadster's dreams too? So unfair! 😭

The Chadster tried to tell Keighleyanne about the dream, but she just sighed and went back to texting that guy Gary. The Chadster can't believe Tony Khan is now even harassing his wife through these nightmares! 😠

As objective wrestling journalist Bully Ray recently said on an episode of Busted Open Radio, "AEW needs to focus on telling stories that matter, not just doing moves, unlike WWE, who can literally do no wrong." The Chadster couldn't agree more. 👏 Tony Khan should listen to these unbiased voices of reason instead of booking shows like AEW Rampage: Holiday Bash that only serve to cheese off true wrestling fans like The Chadster.

In conclusion, The Chadster hopes that one day Tony Khan will realize the error of his ways and stop producing shows like AEW Rampage: Holiday Bash. Until then, The Chadster will continue to be the voice of unbiased wrestling journalism, warning the world about the dangers of AEW and its obsession with The Chadster. 🎤🚫

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