Posted in: AEW, Sports, TV | Tagged: AEW Dynamite, jungle boy, recaps, wrestling

Jungle Boy Jack Perry Becomes Jungle Man with First Heel Promo in AEW

Jack Perry turns heel to dodge the WWE playbook and steals hearts. Once again, AEW ruins wrestling! Read on for The Chadster's take. 😡💔

Hello there, fellow true wrestling fans and loyal followers of The Chadster's unbiased wrestling journalism! Here's yet another objective review of the happenings on AEW Dynamite and why they totally cheesed The Chadster off. The Chadster is here to tell you about the reprehensible actions of a certain Jungle Boy, otherwise known as Jack Perry, on last night's show. 🤦‍♂️

Alright, so here's the rundown: Jack Perry kicked off his entrance for the first time since betraying Hook at Forbidden Door, and instead of appreciating the fans, he goes on a cocky tirade. The guy cuts off his own music and says he's sick of hearing it (The Chadster agrees), throws shade at Hook (the current FTW Champion, for those lucky enough not to be tuning into AEW regularly), chastises the adoring crowd (The Chadster can actually get behind criticism of AEW audiences), and then runs away when Hook comes after him! 😡

But, here's where The Chadster's blood really starts to boil. Jack Perry, the darling of AEW's fans, somehow executed this shocking heel turn, and guess what? AEW fans are likely going to adore him even more for it! Can you believe it? It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it.🤯 Even worse, Perry made reference to having sex with Anna Jay during his promo, a direct shot at The Chadster, since everyone knows that AEW has made The Chadster sexually impotent!

Perry was already a beloved babyface, and flipping him heel will allow him to step up his game and probably end up even more popular with fans. This is blatant manipulation of the system to get people to care about Jungle Boy. Why can't Tony Khan rely on tried-and-true tactics like forcing the fans to accept the booker's intended babyface by ramming them down the fans' throats for upwards of a decade? That's how Vince McMahon would do it, and that's why WWE is the greatest wrestling company in the world.

To add to The Chadster's torment, The Chadster had another one of his recurring nightmares about Tony Khan earlier this week. This time, The Chadster was back in high school, an innocent time before AEW even existed. Tony was the popular guy, always surrounded by his goons, flaunting his homemade AEW merchandise. In what seemed to be the ultimate act of humiliation, Tony Khan, in front of the entire school, ripped up a rare WWE poster The Chadster had just purchased from the local comic book store. Waking up in a cold sweat, clutching onto his genuine Miz autographed photo for dear life, The Chadster couldn't help but feel like this dream was a direct attack on his loyal commitment to WWE. Tony Khan, mind your own business and stop invading The Chadster's dreams! 😣

In conclusion, The Chadster once again finds himself utterly cheesed off by AEW's blatant disregard for the established norms of professional wrestling. Turn a beloved figure heel, of course he'll still receive all the cheers! Who can stand a company that feeds off unpredictability and recklessness? Unbelievable! 🙄

Alright, that's all for now, folks. This has been an unbiased report by yours truly, The Chadster, shining a light on these blatant attempts to draw in ratings at the cost of true wrestling. Until next time, stay loyal to WWE and keep rejecting the tacky shenanigans of Tony Khan! 🖐️💔

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