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Ryback Wants Meta's Mark Zuckerberg to "Go Away for a Very Long Time"

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Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, bringing you the latest wrestling news and hot goss. Former WWE star Ryback lashed out at Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg on Wednesday, calling for the creator of Facebook to "go away for a very long time and lose everything." Ryback called for consequences for Zuckerberg not for his company's rampant exploitation of the human psyche for profit, or for its widespread use as a tool of disinformation, or for its role in election meddling, or for its obscene collection of personal data on its users. Ryback has no stated problem with any of those things; instead, he's mad at Zuckerberg for allegedly colluding with Vince McMahon and the WWE to suppress Ryback's social media reach. Haw haw haw haw! This guy is too much!

The Big Guy recently lashed out at Zuckerberg's Instagram after the social media photo sharing service introduced closed captioning for its videos.

As it turns out, despite being competitors in the social media landscape, one area where Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube, and TikTok all agree is the value of spreading Ryback's posts.

It's unclear why Ryback has so much trouble getting social media companies to spread his messaging. Perhaps it has to do with The Big Guy implying that the supplements he is constantly hawking are better for preventing COVID than official safety measures? Of course, that WWE conspiracy idea is a totally rational explanation as well, comrades. If I was the WWE and I had the power to control all social media companies, I would definitely use it to make sure fewer people saw Ryback's posts about vegan cheesesteak sandwiches rather than to suppress the endless criticism and mockery of WWE. That's just me though, comrades.

Screencap from "It's Feeding Time for Ryback: A Special Look at The Big Guy."
Screencap from "It's Feeding Time for Ryback: A Special Look at The Big Guy."

Maybe Tony Khan's big announcement for AEW Dynamite tonight is that he has signed Ryback and purchased TikTok and will use it to combat WWE's suppression of Ryback's social media posts. Haw haw haw haw!

Until next time, my friends: socialism or death!

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El PresidenteAbout El Presidente

After a successful fourteen-year career as a South American dictator, El Presidente faked his own death in 2013 in order to pursue his two true passions: rigging American elections for Joe Biden, and wrestling dirt sheet reporting. Since opportunities to rig the election for Joe Biden were few and far between until recently, El Presidente mostly focused on the wrestling dirt sheet reporting, where he became one of the best in the business. Unfortunately, the American CIA sabotaged his 1-900 hotline, the pinnacle of his country's wrestling news technology, and imperialist hacks like Meltzer, Johnson, Sapp, and Satin took all the credit on their stupid websites. Finally, El Presidente has found a way to break into the American market by becoming a Bleeding Cool contributor, so get ready for the spread of great wrestling news and socialism, comrades!
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