Posted in: Sports, TV, WWE | Tagged: wrestling, WWE Raw

WWE Raw Preview: The Real Wrestling Show Strikes Back

Ready for REAL wrestling? The Chadster previews the lineup for WWE Raw, proving it's light-years ahead of AEW's gimmicks Full What? It's all about Survivor Series! 🤼‍♖🚫🦄

Auughh man! So unfair! 😩😤 The Chadster spent last weekend extremely cheesed off 🧀😠, all thanks to that master of misery, Tony Khan, and his so-called booking genius at the AEW Full Gear PPV. But oh, sweet Monday, deliverer of joys! 🙌🎉 The Chadster is nearly beside himself with glee, because it's time for the soothing serenade of WWE Raw to wash over The Chadster and make him forget all about Tony Khan's evil antics. 😍❤️ And not just any episode, oh no — but the grand finalé before Survivor Series! 😲💥 A premium live event destined to make put Full Gear right in its place, leaving Tony Khan to rue the day he decided to challenge WWE and RUIN THE CHADSTER'S LIFE! 😤👊

Feast your eyeballs on this, The Chadster's loyal followers! The magnificent card for WWE Raw tonight is nothing short of spectacular. 🌟💫 All the true wrestling fans out there know that Cody Rhodes, Seth Rollins, Sami Zayn, Jey Uso, and a mystery superstar are all set to duke it out with Judgment Day and probablyDrew McIntyre in a WarGames match ! 🤯🔥 Well, one Superstar from each time is going to square off to see who gets the advantage in that match, and The Chadster can hardly contain the excitement for what promises to be a legendary showdown! ✨👀 The Chadster imagines Tony Khan is fuming 🌡️😡 at the mere thought of how stupendous WarGames is poised to be. Bet it doesn't feel great, right Tony? Who's cheesed off now? 🤨💢

Speaking of which, McIntyre will address his actions last week, helping Judgment retain the tag team championships in the main event of last week's WWE Raw. That's probably leading to McIntyre becoming the fifth man on Judgment Day's team, leaving Cody Rhodes and company to find a fifth man of their own. Randy Orton? CM Punk? 🤔 Whoever it ends up being, it will be a better surprise than Tony Khan's signing of Will Ospreay at Full Gear, that's for sure. 🙄 The Chadster can't believe Tony Khan thought he could compete with WWE. 😂🤦‍♂️

But wait – there's more muscle coming to WWE Raw tonight to flex its superiority over anything happening in AEW! 💪💥 Behold, The Chadster's pumped for the clash of the titans as the indomitable Raquel Rodriguez challenges the unstoppable Nia Jax in a display of sheer power and dominance. 😮👊 Anyone who's anybody in the WWE Universe can see that this match personifies the epic storytelling and athleticism that only WWE can provide. The Irresistible Force has been on a tear, declaring herself unparalleled in the women's division. However, Rodriguez is here to shatter that illusion 🔨😏 and prove that The Chadster's beloved WWE nurtures the fiercest female warriors in all of sports entertainment. Who will emerge victorious? The Chadster bets Tony Khan is sweating bullets, knowing he can't replicate this kind of seismic showdown!🔥🤯

And oh, just when Tony Khan probably thought he had landed a devastating uppercut 🥊😏 to The Chadster's beloved WWE, the company delivers a counter that's as sweet as a Smash Mouth jam! 🎶✨ The legendary Becky Lynch, a.k.a. The Man, is on a mission 🚀 of vengeance against Xia Li who crossed a line that should never be crossed in WWE. 🚫 After Xia Li's dastardly sneak attack resulting in Becky losing her chance to take on Rhea Ripley at Survivor Series, it's only a matter of time before justice is served in the squared circle. 😌🔨 Becky's got a score to settle, and The Chadster is certain that the WWE Universe will be captivated by the fiery retribution about to unfold. 🔥💣 It's these high-octane encounters with real, raw emotion that The Chadster knows AEW could NEVER replicate, no matter how hard Tony Khan tries. 😤🙅‍♂️ It's just so disrespectful to the wrestling business and everything WWE has ever done for it, to even suggest otherwise. Auughh man! So unfair! 🤬👎

And then, just like the sweetest echo of a Smash Mouth chorus, The Chadster is hyped because WWE Raw will witness a clinic of pure wrestling prowess as the ultra-talented Chad Gable squares off against the King of Strong Style Shinsuke Nakamura. 🎸👑 "The Master of The Alpha Academy" is aiming to climb the ladder back into the Intercontinental Title picture, and a victory over a superstar of Nakamura's caliber — who let's not forget, won the Royal Rumble in 2018 — could sling-shot Gable right up there. 🌟📈 Nakamura, on the other hand, has been untouchable since his bitter Last Man Standing Match at WWE Fastlane, remaining undefeated and showing the kind of resiliency and determination that sends shivers down The Chadster's spine. 🥶❤️️ This bout isn't just about who's the better man in the ring, it's about momentum, it's about opportunity, and truly, it's about the heart of competition that WWE exemplifies. 🏆❤️️ The Chadster bets that Tony Khan couldn't orchestrate such an awe-inspiring encounter if he tried, even if he sat ringside taking notes! 📝😂 The Chadster cannot wait to see if Gable can upset the odds, or if Nakamura's winning streak will continue to shine like an All Star. 🌟✨ No matter what, The Chadster's beloved WWE is delivering another unforgettable match, while Tony Khan's AEW lags behind, trying futilely to keep up! 😜🏁

So make sure to tune in to WWE Raw tonight at 8/7C on USA, folks! 📺⏰ If you want to witness true sports entertainment at its finest, there's no other place to be. Trust The Chadster on this – the magnificence of WWE programming is something that evil Tony Khan could never tarnish, no matter how hard he tries with his little AEW shenanigans. 🙈😒 Honestly, The Chadster believes that Tony Khan might be the worst thing to happen to wrestling since… ever! 🤮👎 Every move Khan makes seems calculated to annoy The Chadster and take down The Chadster's beloved WWE. But guess what, Tony? It's not gonna work! WWE is the pinnacle, the zenith, the top turnbuckle of wrestling excellence, and not even your billionaire wallet can change that. So keep your Monday night clear, because WWE Raw is where the real action's at! 😌👊🔥

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