Posted in: Comics | Tagged: bill and ted, gay, superman, universal
Gay Stereotype Superman Dooms Bill And Ted's Hallowe'en Show
Universal Studios Hollywood has announces it is cancelling its Bill & Ted Halloween Horror Nights show, heavily criticised for being homophobic. Also racist. Also terrible..
The focus of their ire was the portrayal of Superman, who was "turned gay" by being sprinkled with "fairy dust" before turning into a string of gay stereotypes played for laughs. Vice.com reported;
After becoming gay, Superman's voice and posture changes. His lips purse, his toes point inward, and his wrists become limp. His new voice sounds like a homophobic uncle doing a drunken impression of Richard Simmons, complete with lisps and frequent use of the word "faaaaaaabulous!"
Bill and Ted, understandably, are bummed. Their initial excitement at having Superman with them on their quest turns to disappointment as, obviously, now that Superman is gay, he is not going to be of any use to them. "Who could possibly make a worse Superman?" asks Bill. "Ben Affleck?" responds Ted.
Superman also rips off his shirt. Because gay dudes hate shirts almost as much as they hate pussy (which is to say, A LOT).
Then, because Superman is now gay, he minces over to Bill and Ted, blows kisses at them, and slaps Ted on the ass. As he does this, Bill and Ted say "awwww dude!" with disgusted voices.
After a few more attempts at molesting Bill and Ted, Superman ends up aboard the Starship Enterprise, where he runs into Superman villain General Zod.
General Zod tells Superman to get on his knees. Because Superman is now gay, he assumes this is an invitation to give Zod oral sex. "Finally!" he squeals.
Also aboard the Starship Enterprise, the gang runs into George Takei. Because George Takei is gay too, he and Superman share an instant mutual attraction. "Who's your friend?" asks George, in the same lisping, gay-minstrel voice that Superman uses.
Before Bill and/or Ted can answer, Superman interrupts by yelling "Hey daddy!" to George. (If you're not homosexual, "Hey daddy!" is a mating call used by younger gays to initiate sex with older gays.)
George and Superman disappear to have sex. "Time to boldly go where no man has gone before!" says George, as they exit the stage.
And now… no more. But, to be fair, it doesn;t sound like you were missing much.